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Peppy Miller Nov 2013
I forget too often that not everyone sees me the way I see me;
Not everyone knows there to be a bleeding heart sinking solemnly behind my ribcage
Nor the rattle that my skull makes from too many poor decisions,
The scars on my knees and legs that tab a memory of a something somewhere in the history that is mine,
The lack of lobe that inhibits my passions for specificity,
The anger that bubbles within my veins when I neglect the rose bushes I've slept in for so long,
The tuft of hair that throws itself to the wind, proving to be the small stubborn part of me,
The knowledge that has escaped me with the miles I burn on four wheels,
The physical pain that plagues my valuable parts that become less and less worth something everyday,
The weight that overcomes me sometimes when I feel myself through waves of gravity,
The form I place to my inner and outer self: nothing good, smart, or attractive.
I suppose the mirror has darkened over the years, the veil has been placed lower over my eyes so most of the view is felt through shadows that are  drawing me day in and day out, begging me to make a choice.
I suppose that it's not the way I'm perceived though,  I ought to remember.
Peppy Miller Nov 2013
The checks you cash will never rid your tooth of it's browned imperfections
The ounces you pour will never give your eyelids the tender kiss of sleep they so deserve
The empty words you place in everyone's ear will prove less dense than skin cells, contributing that much to your beauty
The numbers you record will not make your locks hit any further down on your shoulders
Likewise the tips you earn won't save you from your thoughts
You may be rich though;
Rich in memories
Rich in sorries
Rich in imperfections
Rich in leaves
Rich in heart
Rich in beauty
You will be taxed on your emotions and health by the universe one day
The price you put on things will affect the kind of person you aspire to become and the radiance of your soul
If you were rich enough to buy one
Peppy Miller Nov 2013
The depths of the sea will never know me
My mysteries are as good as hers
But I was there once
An oyster at best
Making pearls
Drowned
Peppy Miller Oct 2013
Have you ever seen brains pouring down the sidewalk?
Been so scared your next move could cost you your life?
Never dreamed about having no kids, no wife
When the only thing you know is fight or flight.

Do so many drugs that you can't think no more
Children ignored, women all ******
The only escape is the next time I'm high
get out of myself and finally fly

I dream of a world where the humor comes easy
things aren't so serious and me becomes we
But sometime ago the line had been drawn
whites fearing blacks and the neighborhood, gone

Suburban white girl, you've got a thing to learn
I don't get sad because the sadness burns
I incinerate enough with the trouble I'm in
either school or jail, I just can't win

It's all obligation, a survival technique
I intimidate them, their money makes them weak
I can't say that I would want to get along
I know what love is though, correct me if I be wrong

Yea I'm in a gang, but I ain't never killed a dude
I still feel ****, I still need food
So maybe my thoughts and actions don't align
I don't care for the segregation but I ain't tryin
For now, my words are to inform and make you think
Put yourself in my shoes, only then will our worlds sync
Peppy Miller Oct 2013
we are pushed out of our mothers' wombs into this cruel world
where we..
all ****
sleep
love
think
exist
*****
control only us
control only our hearts
breathe
breathe
breathe
feel
feel nothing
feel everything
create
destroy
die
Peppy Miller Oct 2013
We took everything off the shelf
opened each can to look inside our self
diced the onion until we had tears in our eyes
skinned the potato until the rough skin subsides
chopped the carrot so only sweetness remained;
rotten lost, flavor gained
turned the knobs to the highest setting
combined our ingredients to avoid forgetting
heated well and tried for taste
we added spices until the right ones were placed
you said you wanted a cinnamon girl
we grabbed it from the lazy Susan and gave it a whirl
it was just what we needed but we were too blind to see
I burned my tongue when you were feeding me
it still needed work but we never lost patience
we just kept trying; most things require maintenance
the finished product was reached after a while
you poured in cheese as I flashed a cornbread smile
Peppy Miller May 2013
Day time unfolds like a puddle being evaporated by the sun
We can't exactly predict when it will happen but we can feel it all around;
Outwardly, we are lifted of our bodies
As we look down, the ground begins to turn to magma
If we leave anything behind then it will surely be swallowed up by the gravity
Left without density
Left without a shadow
If neither are present then this something must not exist
How can it be felt if it can't exist
It lives on within all of us at different points of each day
We cannot know what prompts it
We cannot prepare ourselves for it
Alls we can do is recognize it and let it become a particle of the sky
Just like all the things we let go.
My anxiety comes within the sunlight
My soul is heavy in the day
The clock strikes a certain hour and it decides to rear it's ugly head;
Only to be evaporated once the sun hits the routine part of it's orbit
When dusk begins to fall, so too does my mood
The worries subside
Until I reach my peak of R.E.M. Or perhaps get stuck in a web before that
Either way, I'm one by night and another by day.
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