It's weird how last year

I cried because I'd

A soul sheared alone



And yet now I've felt

Quite fine when I try

For true solitude



Strange 'tis: I find bliss

In wind that did spin

The storm of great form

Why

Does my sad mind belie my life

In such a way like that of flames?

For

The side of mine that cries I try

With much in vain to flick away

Though

Inside it hides, alive in spite

The hutch that reins it far from day

Perfect for jackets;

live rainbows laced with gold that

fills my library.

I concede I shall never be a truly happy man. I'm disregarding and empty of faith in everything; Any God, humanity, and love. I've tried to mask myself as much as I can. But the mask I wore is gradually peeling. My days of trying are exhausted and done.



Now I'll surrender any control of my Self, but not my body. Drift along a river that's flowing past. With battle scar to commemorate the times when I still loved and for Love I did try. But I've lost the war and the sky is foggy. The exile of my own soul unto me is cast. Glance back at the gates; far through them, it's reminiscent of when I had flied.

The wait is much too long for me to bear

A laugh eclipses a diminished mind

Temporary joy that is soon to die

Crying on the shoulder made up of air

Pile blankets and wrap your arm 'round it

Share your feelings to the void as you sleep

Getting by, by faking the things I need

Like a magnet, it just pulls me right in



But even if all I do is glance left

The water and love; within they are kept

Like a magnet, it just pulls me astray

Farther and farther until I give up

And my only chance is gone all because

I hesitated the whole year away.

I drew.

I drew with the shapes I've learned to make everything of.

These shapes could be used

On a canvas absent of boundaries

And I drew

I drew of love, and hope, and suicide

An art that depicted loss, and solitude, and desperation

And all of this and nothing changed;

I knew not one thing more

Except I was given another thought

To pile upon the mountain of them

That drowns the whole sea of them

And soars through the air that was clouded with them



The thought?



It was love

That I had hoped

As I once contemplated suicide



The cure of loss

Of people and solitude

That made me living desperation



I would say I like to only think about things instead

But if I were to once listen to my feelings,

Well,

I would say not one single lie was etched here.

When the day rains

The sky is crying tears

Tears that have fallen

For thousands of years



Tears of billions of souls

The sky cries them all

Some of them are yours and mine

So let them fall, just fall



The sky picked them all up

From the ground where I wept

Let fall the ones formed from

The pillow upon which I have slept



Allow these despaired waters

To wash away your pain

As you cry your own tears

That will soon become rain



Rain is the name

We call the sky

When the dark clouds fold

And it starts to cry



And soon the long-kept sorrows

Will all be washed away

As the rain sprinkles your face

On a wet crying day



A rainy day

Washes the pain.