So much pain, and whose to blame -
So much pain, and easy to say it wasnt me.
But if I look into the mirror of my heart,
And if I am honest with myself I will see
That much of the blame belongs to me.

How many times have I accepted the stories
Ive been fed, in the stories Ive read,
about them and me Who is them and who is me,
We call ourselves two nations but if we go back
we will find we are really brothers and sisters,
with the same father-Abraham

In this land  Palestine / Israel that we call home
That both nations consider that we own,
What was done then, created a rift so vast so painful.
Could Sarah then have known or conceived
That that her actions would continue for so long.
And would leave ripples of separation for her family.

How many times have I read the slanted news
That made me and my family right so we could make
our brothers in the wrong, and visa versa.
Is it possible now after so long
That we can change the path we walk along.
Is it so important to prove who is right and who is wrong.

It is not too late to change the state of mind,
To bring down the barriers that we have created,
To share the land and prosper, and return to being family.
All it would take is to remember Love to remember that
the separation starts in our minds,  
And that there are always two sides to every story.

We hurl rocks and missiles at eachother
We forget that we are hurting our brother and our sisters
We forget that children know how to play
And make up and return to love, a heartbeat away.
Two rights cant make it wrong if we remember eachother
Two wrongs remembered - separate eachother
It is time to recreate that what we have done wrong
And not one side or the other is totaly right or wrong.

Where have I been these past months?
How have I raised myself past the humps.
I gaze at the screen as these little squiggles
Fill the lines - and the back of my neck
shivers as I try to persuade myself
that I’m feeling fine.

Time passes, the days separate into nights,
Weeks go past and now months -
Where have I been?  The sun I’ve hardly seen
People like mosquitoes have tried
to get my attention. Now they are here,
now there and sometimes, everywhere.

I’m tired, I wish from work that I was fired
That way in my bed all day I would stay.
Without getting up, I could close the windows
to protect me from my awful neighbors .
That way the smell of their cooking
would stay out of my head.

Tomorrow, like yesterday is kinda far away.
In my bed I would stay waiting for the day to become yesterday.
Waiting to escape from my body and go home
to the place I would feel at home in.
Where once again I would connect and merge into the Everything,
Nothing to see, nothing to feel, nothing to do or nothing to be.

Until the day  I can look into the mirror of my soul
And realize throughout eternity I was always connected and whole
It was boredom  with which I was affected.
It was boredom which which encouraged me to flee
To seek  new worlds and pastures of where to play and be me
New characters I would create to mirror my present state?

I realize too that the wonderful children loved ones and friends
that surround me  - are parts of me
How could I think that I was lonely and separate
When so many mirrors of love shine all around me
Where every day a new day dawns, and every night I go back home
Back to the place where I am safe the place which is my true home.

You are always with me
Even though I have separated from you
Even when I feel alone and unloved.
You are always with me

You never forsake me even though
I  have forsaken you,
Your love is the gentle breeze
That ruffles leaves on trees.
It is the glue that holds mountains in place
And keeps Earth on its axis.

And even though I have forgotten
All my  highest aspirations.
Your love is in the warm darkness of caves,
And the light of dragonfly wings.

No matter where I hide and what  I do
You never forsake me.
Your voice is in the sound
Of every inbreath and outbreath I take.

The Earth my mother caresses my feet,
And holds my head pointed
Straight to you in the heavens.
The sun shines even behind clouds,
And the moon casts a heavenly light
Over Earth as I sleep.


Like the catterpillar I gratify only my earthly needs
And forget my  highest aspirations.
I even forget that within me
Lies the promise of the beautiful butterfly I am.
It is only when I begin to love the catterpillar within
Will I soar to my highest potential

1)  Thou shalt have reverence for Life, for that Life flows through you, your neighbour and all the Kingdoms of the Universe. Yea even to the very Source of all Life.

2) Thou shalt let Life flow and fear not, for there is a definate plan which shall lead you and give you that which is right for you.

3) Thou shalt not get so emotionally involved in Life that you forget the purpose thereof.  It is an experience to open your Divine Heart to an even greater love. It is a way to gain understanding and a greater experience of enlightenment.

4) Thou shalt enjoy Life for it was meant to be enjoyed, and can only be lived to the full by serving others in joy and love.

5)  Thou shalt have compassion for thyself, remembering that if you cannot love thyself you cannot not truly fully love anything or any one else to the full - for all is One and all is Love

6)  Thou shalt hold onto the positive for by holding onto the negative you make it strong.

7) Thou shalt not bend to earthly desire for power, wealth, food nor drink - in  excess these are not good for you.

8) Thou shalt not punish yourself or another needlessly - you have paid past debts back by suffering - and now have wiped the slate clean. Remember too that you are held responsible for all new debts incurred.

9) Thou shalt not be afeared by mass media which pollutes your mind and springs from a mass of polluted minds.

10) Know that ultimately you have power over nothing material - and nothing material has power over you except that which you give power to.
Remember too that one cycle of Life is but one season in Eternity. Therefore LIVE, LOVE and ENJOY the NOW yesterday has been, and cant be changed, tomorrow will come bringing its own changes.

Dear people, what have you done to the dream?
I stood with so much pride
As the votes were counted one by one,
My heart burst with love as the exiles returned
And my soul was fired with the desire
To fulfil our destiny and return the land
Once again into an oasis of hope.

But what have you done to the dream?
Where is the love the unity and hope?
What have you done to my dream when your sons
Who serve in the army fear that their bullet will strike down
An angry stone wielding youth so full of hate because
Your hearts have become hardened to his needs.

I have walked this land in my dreams
And have seen what we could have had
A  heaven on earth, but what have we got?
A land so full of intolerance not only of enemy against enemy
But of brother against brother.
Money has become G-d, and the banks, temples of worship.
No more is it what can I give, but rather what can I get.

I have walked this land in the guise of an immigrant-
And have taken the 'rights' given to me.
I have walked this land in the guise of an old person,
And have felt the fear of being unwanted and unloved.
And  I have closed my  heart,
And have lost my ability to give love freely.
I have walked  this land in the guise of boys and girls
Who have borne the responsibility of the army
But have mourned my lost youth.
I  have closed myself to my sensitive heart .
And I have walked this land in the guise of men
And women burdened by the system.
The path seems an uphill fight to survive.
I have walked this land in the guise of a politician ,
Offering the solution - only if done my way.
To survive I have wheeled and dealed
And have almost forgotten how to make miracles happen
It is only when crisis strikes and I forget myself,
And remember my brothers and sisters
That I go within and draw from the fountain of strength,
And get a glimpse, once again of what
We as a nation of brothers and sisters can create.

Sobbing from the heart
Is the cry of all humanity.
It is the yearning to be free
Of the shackles
That keep us tied to Earth.
It is the pain of separation,
The veil that shuts us from the truth.

We cry - not only for ourselves
But for past and future generations.
It is a longing to return to the Oneness
within which all is known.

We create the pain
In order to release it
Back to the Universe
It allows us to be free

I stand alone - a child in need of care
I have rights, but these I do not know yet.
I can only learn them from you,  the people around.
Through the clamour and noise hear me,
I have the right to be heard.

Please teach me that I have the right to be me,
And that I have a right to an equal share.
Help me to express my own feelings,
Even the confusion, hurt and anger within,
In such a way, that I know that I am accepted.

With acceptance, teach me acceptance.
Give me love unconditional,
For I live up to  your expectations of me.
Give me space to grow, and sometimes the right to say no.

May I be proud of my uniqueness,  
And help me understand,
That the names I'm called
I don't have to be.

With integrity, teach me integrity.
With love, teach me love.
Within me is a special gift.
Help me to unlock it,
So I can share, be it a loving smile,
A patient way, or the ability to care.

When I look into the eyes of a child

A sense of fun, love and beauty smiles down on me.

When I look into the eyes of a child

I remember stillness  and the stillness of  just being me

I remember love and the joy of knowing love

And of needing not to be.

When I look into the eyes a child

There is an elusiveness that reminds me

That there is something  I still need to remember.

I am encased in all that I am but not all that I have to be.

May your life stretch out before you
As a rainbow, on which you glide,
In health, joy and happiness.
May you walk
Through fields of flowers,
And see beauty
In the way things are.
May the love I have for you
Warm you.
May there always be
Someone close
To share love with you,
And wipe your tears away
With their kisses and caring.
May you never make the mistake
Of punishing yourself, or others.
May you be free to
Throw away early conditioning,
Which might separate you from yourself.
Allow the light and wisdom
Which lies deep in your subconscious
To be set free.
May you see your life's purpose
And create and fulfill your destiny,
May happiness be with you always.  
        

Depression had been my companion for a while,
I felt trapped in a body wracked with pain.
My heart was heavy.

I saw her running down the isle of the supermarket,
All of three years old, golden curls billowing behind,
A look of pure joy on her face,
An angel straight from heaven right in our midst.

Her mother walked behind,
Lines of care and tension etching her face.
I saw she was living in a world of struggle and turmoil.
"Glenda" she called,
"How many times have I told you not to do that".
Her hand spun out -- she gave the child a whack.
I saw surprise and a veil dull the eyes
That a moment ago were so alive.
"Don't ever do that again." she slowly said.

For one moment I remembered what it felt like to be so free,
For in that child I saw me.  
I remembered how it felt to have a heart that had no boundary,
To have a body light as can be.
When was I told not to be me?

I wanted to say
"Dear child don't let that experience deter you
Remember who you really are.
Always remember that feeling of freedom that surrounds you.
Dont forget who you really are
And never be afraid to be who you are."
Stay open and remember where you were
Before you even arrived here on earth

You come from a place of rainbows, butterflies and angels,
A place where everything is possible and achievable
A place where miracles happen
And a place where there is only love
Reach for the moon, reach for the stars
You are a light sent from afar

If your words were seeds,
What kind of flowers would grow?
If your thoughts were flowers,
What garden would show?
If your feelings were colors,
What picture could you paint?
Your past and future,
The pattern of your life
And the world around you,
Are the results of your
Collective thinking.

As I reflect on my experience of you
I remember the first time we met.
You were placed in my arms.
As I unwrapped you, you opened one eye,
Sized me up and went to sleep.
In that moment I got to see
The being you truly are – PERFECT.

Unfortunately it was not long until I got caught up in the role
of what I thought a parent ought to be –
Which was not to become like my parents.
I started working on the long list stored in my mind.
The memos that began with "a parent should not"
Somehow were the easiest ones for me to repeat.

Luckily in time, with your help,
I realized I was reflecting myself on to you.
With the result that I was behaving in an inappropriate manner.
I'm  now sorry for the pain my ignorance caused you.
Me reflecting my inadequacies on to you,
was my attempt to teach me what I had forgotten,
And that was just how perfect you are.

I also had forgotten how perfect
I was when I too arrived on this planet.
So the game of parenting had begun.
Your training began with me teaching you my faults
which of course I was reflecting on to you.
You in your quiet way stood your ground
and showed me what I wanted to see.
                            

What I admire you so much for,
is that  you remembered who you are,
you began teaching me life as you saw it.
I was a puppet in your hands.
With each lesson you taught me,
I landed up richer in experience
And my mind was stretched
into seeing a different aspect of truth.

Today I am able to ask "What is truth?
What you taught me? is that truth is what it is.
And when it comes from an open mind
and a loving heart it is always kind and supportive
and that there always is room in it for growth.
  I think that  I known that when you were younger
you would have had an easier time.

You gave me so many wonderful opportunities
of seeing life through your innocent eyes.
The games we played together
and the stories we read enabled me to see
many other aspects of life,

As you sponged up experience and knowledge
I little realized that I was absorbing things anew.
The person you are has made me a better person
than I could ever have been without you.

Early childhood milestones **** by,
   first tooth,
       first words,
           first steps,
                first days at school.

Teenage milestones are anticipated,
    first date,
       first dance,
            first kiss.

Adult milestones arrive,
       first job,
           twenty-first,
                 engagement,
                     marriage,                                                                              
                       offspring.

Middle age milestones are measured
             by milestones of offspring.

Through latter years one yearns for
             milestones that have been.

At the end of one's years
        one waits for the inevitable,
              ultimate, milestone of
                    death and rebirth

Do not sell your ideals for a love
That is conditional and transitional,
It might cause you to give up the real you.
Seek that which is enduring
It will fulfill you more than passing pleasure.
Understand the limitations of others
But never let them trap you in their own reality.
Know what you really are -
You are a universe, you are beauty,
You are truth, you are love.
Forgive yourself for all the times
That you have hurt yourself and others
Know, that had your realised the truth
You would not have done the things to them
And most of all to yourself
Love all that you are
Love all that you see
Judge not, stay free

To To the eight girls in my care
and thanks to Rudyard Kipling]

IF I can keep my cool,
When all about me are losing theirs and
IF I can retaliate "I hate you",
With "I see you are angry",
And still give you all an equal share.
IF the infectious diseases,
Sleepless nights, and bad language,
Don't destroy me and
IF I can hang in there,
I'm getting there,
So I'll hang in there.
IF I can be and allow you to be,
And still be,
I take my hat off to me.
IF I can temper
The tantrums with a laugh,
And laugh at the temper,
The temperature's right.
IF I can be a listener,
A friend, a seamstress,
A driver a giver a taker ,
A mother, a teacher and a father
I'm your parent my friends,
And you had better listen to me

You are the child I that I call mine,
The child that I birthed into this place.
You have brought me joy,
And an opportunity for growth.

Your open heart, and loving soul
Has opened me to the understanding
That I cannot know all of you
For you are all things to me.

When I feel the gentle rain
I feel your gentle love.
The sound of water, the smell of the sea,
The breeze on my face all remind me of you.

When I stand on a mountain
I feel your support.
When I look at the stars
I see your shining light.

You never comprise yourself or judge another,
You never complain but in your quiet way,
You smile and laugh, even though others would cry.
You always have a kind and loving word for everyone.

You remind me that life
Cannot be parceled into tangible form.
You remind me to be open hearted
And that Love is forever

You remind me, that without you,
I would not be the me that I am.
And through you my horizons

Have encompassed the planet.

You remind me of hope for a better future
.You are the light of my soul,
The joy in my heart
And the promise of a better world.

When I was a child
Fireflies romped and played
In the night skies.
But that was before DDT

Wagtails strutted on green grass.
They drank from pools and made me laugh
That too was before DDT

When I was a child
Forested mountains grew high
For us to climb up into the sky
But now new mountains
Of plastic and garbage grow
And so they will stand
For they decompose so slow.

Trees on the mountains
Are all chopped down.
The birds and the animals
Who lived there before
Are gone and many will be seen no more.

We’ve ****** the underground rivers
Of oil almost dry
And polluted the air
Until you can hardly see the sky
We've dirtied the rivers
With our waste that piles high.

Proud mountain lions, tigers,
Elephants, gorillas and monkeys do flee
To the last few places
Where they can roam free.

I fear what will happen
When we destroy them too.
What kind of world
Do we leave for our children
Tell me please do

When are we going to realize
That we are running out of time.
The earth, birds, animals, air, and sky – cry.
Who is listening?
Who cares?
Who will try to change
The course we are moving along?

I wrote this poem about 4 years before Mandella became president
I post it now as we remember Mandella and the legacy of change that has taken place in S.A.


Out of the darkness of Apartheid and separation came Reconciliation and new ways of beingness have opened up, not only in South Africa but all over the world.
I prayed for peace for South Africa my birth place.
I pray for peace for Israel Palestine and the Middle East where I now live
And I pray for peace throughout our world may we all remember love and may our legacy for our children be one of LOVE


People came to Southern Africa from many lands and many places drawn by their destiny.
They came, bringing with them memories of each place they called home.
They moved deep into the heart of the country engulfing the people already there.
Alas for many many years the nations remained separate and the people suffered.
Great nations from far away who felt the call within their own lands for change called out to the people of South Africa and told them it was time to make changes,
But the hearts of those in power remained hardened.
The Black people became strong and it came to pass that a great need for change arose deep within their hearts -
"Let's break down the barriers" they cried -- but how? They tried to talk, but the words became meaningless,
They tried to fight and many died. Still people went their own separate ways.
There came a time when the winds of change blew from far off lands the winds blew over the mountains.
They blew over the cities and farms. The earth called out to the people
Remember the heart of Africa has many colours, and beats in many different ways
The heart of Africa lies deep within the rhythms of the land.
If within the heart of Africa there is love - peace will reign.
Let each man be free to choose his path, Let each man choose his destiny.
Let the drumbeat of love beat it's rhythms and let the Eternal fire of love cleanse away hurt and sorrow,
And let the rainbow of love colour the nation of the New Africa.

The sounds of the wind as it blew over the land filled hearts with love.
"Love will bring people together it echoed, love will touch all hearts.
And the time will come when each man will be free to be himself -- with love all men will be free.
Children were the first to hear, and they reached out over the barriers and accepted each other,
They looked beyond colour, they let the drumbeat of love beat its rhythm through their hearts,
Until it touched the leaders and those in prisons who were there because they had cried freedom.
They allowed the eternal fire of love to cleanse away the hurt and sorrow,
And let the rainbow of love colour the nation of the new Africa.