from myself

from this body that never belonged to me

from the images of you burned in the back of my brain

from reality

from myself

Trying
to convince yourself that you don’t love someone is

such
a
grand
sin.

He may be destroying me,
I may be destroying myself,
but to deny my love for him is ludicrous.

When I see pictures of you two smiling together,

it burns my heart,

burns my whole body,

my soul,

mind.

You will come back to me,

But I won’t be around.

You’ll look for where I’ve been,

And they’ll tell you

“She’s nowhere to be found.”

You’ll look on my old streetcorner,

But blackness is all you will find.

You had me, you lost me, I am an imagination of your mind.

If I could hold his smile in my sad hands
one last time..
I wouldn't need another thing.
To feel the lines of his laughter..
I wouldn't need another thing.
His smile unleashes doves from their cages,
and gives me hope with each new dawn.

*"Just to see that smile
Makes my life worthwhile."

You: "See you later."
Me: "Goodbye--
phone cuts
.. forever."
That was
the last time
I heard your voice.
Fly blackbird, fly.