We know the world is a crazy place
and that is it easy to give up, throw in the towel.
The idealism of youth gives way to the cynicism of middle age
when we realize that despite our best efforts, change is very difficult.
To be a parent and, in particular, to be a father....why bother?

Some say fatherhood is driven by ego,
the child providing the ultimate selfish representation of oneself.
Others say driven by fear,
the fear of mortality and the unconscious and genetic need
to propagate and maintain our lineage, our species, our world.
While both can be true, I believe the best manifestation of fatherhood
is  driven by tikkun olam, a Jewish concept that we all have an obligation
to better the world, to move it to a better state than currently exists.

We do what we can when on this earth to love our family, friends,
and be as righteous as this world will allow.
Our genetic legacy is not nearly as important as
our obligation to pass on what we know, have learned, have experienced,
and enable our children
to carry the mission to an always higher level.
No matter what our belief in the afterlife, and what the future may hold
we are here now in THIS life,
and as long as we move the ball further and further
in the right direction, there can be hope.

Truly being a father, a good father, enables hope.  Maybe that is enough.

We are taught to be goal oriented at an early age...

Learn to share and others will share with you
Eat your vegetables and you can have dessert
Finish your homework and you can play outside

Through adolescence and into adulthood, the conditioning occurs unabated...

Practice hard and you will make the team
Score well on tests and you will place into a good university
Keep your nose to the grindstone and success in career will follow

Is it any wonder many religions fit the same mold?

Do onto others as you would have them do onto you,
but, hey, the real payoff will come in the afterlife

Have you ever wondered what would change if the future
was not quite so clear,
perhaps a little fuzzy,
even uncertain?

What if you knew now,
that you would not be given your place above the clouds,
an eternity of bliss,
a value proposition that cannot be surpassed?

What if all there was is what is,
our time together,
our relationships,
our ability to do right on this earth simply
to enable others to grow,
to thrive,
and to be happy?

Would you...change your plans? Change your master scheme?

If and when a judgment day comes,
who will be the more pure of heart....
the one that is once again striving for the goal
or the one that is acting simply for the reason that

it is the right thing to do?

I was told a parent's job was
to prepare their children to be adults

Shower them with unconditional love and
let them know they can be whatever they dream
Another part of the process, however,
was helping them build their inner core,
their resilience which will be
required to bounce back from life's
twists, tumbles and unfortunate events.
That which they learn from, failures included,
makes them stronger.

So, what of these bowling bumper guards?
It sure makes the kids feel great that they
will hit pins no matter how the ball is released
No chance to end up in the gutter,
no real need to practice their form,
to experience the pain of the infamous "gutter ball"
Everyone can be happy with mediocre performance.

Am I the only one who sees the major parallels
with an America gone soft?

We start the process at a very early age now...

Returning from the day
I reach the front door
Before I turn, I hear the scamper
Excitement on 4 legs...jumping...squeaking
Entering, looking for family
Are they home, do they care?
All wrapped up in their world
Growing, changing, on their own
Love is there, but scattered, sporadic
All but that of the the fuzzy one
The one who can only know the present
Does not worry for the future
Nor regret the past and
Asks for nothing but my love
Now, in the moment, in this moment
So happy, so joyful, so free