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paschelaco Mar 2022
-
I played in the woods today
I sat myself on a board and grabbed what came to me
the picture I created is irrelevant
the time I spent in this spot is prime
for an hour I messed with
sticks, twigs, weeds,
and what looked like to be old flowers
as I just played, I noticed this is something
my younger self would have enjoyed
back then, I wouldn't have been so much
on the cleanliness of things
now, I use a stick to smooth over the
dirt to save my hands from filth
as I resurfaced, I felt high
I felt in the earth
an hour went by while I was away
only with her
I think about life at times
thought about the next thing
to stick in the ground
then thought of nothing
paschelaco Mar 2022
-
I always drove
it provided a sense of control
you in the passenger seat
but I always missed out-
looking at you-
studying the features of your face
deciding which freckle was my favorite
so when you ask me
"why do you keep staring at me"
and I reply "I'm just looking"
I am catching up from all the times
I didn't get the chance to
paschelaco Mar 2022
-
although you almost killed me
you gave me a reason to live
not the life you wanted-
but one where I am truly myself
t
paschelaco Mar 2022
-
and "just like that"
I was back where it all started
I could feel their hands engulf me
the pulling getting needier and harder

"****"

I am not satisfied often but-
with their hands around my neck
to me, there is a constant craving
one that I will be a **** for
I grasped
I could feel my vision going out
there is something invigorating-
I could feel everything slipping away
but all I could say was-

"harder"

closer and closer to the line
that I hope you would cross

I want the pain to match the kind I have in my head

the kind with-
swollen eyes
bruised faces
****** lips
and sore hands

please,

harder
paschelaco Mar 2022
-
in one given moment
it all began to make sense
with your chosen words
I could see clearly what you wanted
it was all the precious pieces
it was repulsive but
looking now
I think it will be just fine
paschelaco Mar 2022
-
living often lies in between the memories
or at least the things we think are memorable
but often those things will stick with us
the things we truly miss are the things
that slip our mind the quickest
the common places
the things we had done so many times
we just forgot
the things we eventually took for granted
paschelaco Mar 2022
-
740 days
17760 hours
1065600 minutes
63936000 seconds

I knew I felt off
it was the day after
I should have known
I forgot...
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