Submit your work, meet writers and drop the ads. Become a member
1.1k · Sep 2010
Masochism
Paris R T Sep 2010
I opened  my eyes on a fine Sunday morning.
My eyes were still red from the late night mourning.
Today is Valentine’s Day
The one holiday
I wanted to truly experience.
But he left me a month before,
Not hesitating to run out the door.
He left me
To go and see
If my best friend would be with him.
I guess I was mad
But relieved just a tad.
He was vulnerable today.
He certainly doesn’t think of me
Anymore.
He tried to be
The best thing I’d seen.
But he left me.
He’ll never get to see
The real side of me
Ever again.
I truly thought he loved me with his whole heart.
The thought of him leaving just tore me apart.
Then it happened and he was long gone.
I glance at the computer and weep.
We didn’t say a proper goodbye.
I won’t think of him.
He said to me,
I love you,
No longer,
Goodbye.
You
don’t
know
what
you
have
­ until
it’s
gone
forever.
I never meant a thing to him.
All that mattered was image.
No longer did he say,
“See her? That’s her.”
To his friends.
Without him,
Nothing.
I needed that boy like air.
So now, I can’t breathe.
To him I say,
“I love you.”
With my
Last
Breath.
Never again will I love.
That boy took me above
The highest cloud in the sky.
Why he left, I’ll never know why.
Surely, she’s not worth the time,
She’ll never read this simple rhyme.
I don’t plan on showing her.
Sometimes, I regret knowing her.
But knowing all the times we shared,
No one’s better when compared.
That’s not what I’m trying to say.
Most of the time, my love just slips away.
And today
Is Valentine’s Day
That one holiday
I’ll never know.
As it finally turns out
I don’t need him
In my life
Only one
Nevermore.
Moving on
Never felt so good.
Breaking up
Has never been this much of a relief.
The pain in my heart
Turns me into a *******,
Reveling in hurt
And enjoying myself in the process.
I hunger for love,
But wouldn’t that end badly as well?
Surely it would,
I can just tell.
My
Empty heart
Is the best
Thing I’ve felt in
A
Very
Long
Time.
I want this new boy to see the real me
The person he’d surely die for
He’s the best a boy could be
And the worst at the same time.
But this guy…
He’ll never
Love me
Like I
Love him.
There’s some more pain
Shattering the remnants of my heart.
God, give me more
Heartbreak.
I need more
Disaster.
This pain is
Crippling,
And it feels so
Good.
© 2010 Paris R. T.
634 · Sep 2010
Away
Paris R T Sep 2010
I try to fall asleep
And dream my tears away.
I just can’t shake the feeling
That no one ever stays.
They see my pain;
The scars of yesterday,
So they just stay away,
No one to lean on;
No one to whom I can pray;
There is no God
In a world so astray.
Put on a fake smile;
Pretend you’re okay.
Just walk away.
The pain in my chest swells,
A reminder of the fateful day.
What made me deserve
Such a high price to pay?
If only someone could come by
And make me feel okay.
But for now, they stay away,
© 2010 Paris R. T.

— The End —