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267 · Dec 2018
1
1
It is war time, I suppose.
Gunshots fill long silences,
Too many bodies to be disposed.
All war is is a virus,
Planted in the cores of our withering bones,
So shut your mouth and hold onto your woes.

Mercy? In this household?
It’s so absurd it’s pitiful.
Mercy is one to thole,
And you are only a criminal.
Come, to the store we go;
We wouldn’t want to miss out on our rations.

“Treat your neighbor as if he was your son!”
The politician shouts.
“This war can only be stopped by love!”
Is said in random spouts.
But our ears are forever closed,
For, wherever love reigns, so does blood.

These spoken words are envious!
They talk exclusively of life and peace
And, yet, they wait and see
Who’s heart will first cease.
So I beg of you, speakers
To tell me how love is not in vain!

Your newly founded silence is enough,
Gunshots systematically go on and off,
I know there is no meaning in your bluff.
A child now makes their final cough,
So you bow your heads
And bring your hands up.

They pray to God for Mercy,
But Mercy has long left;
Of which brings forth controversy
About if His power had been finally spent.
And when the heaven’s fires fall down unto us,
All we can do is scream and combust.

Oh God, Where are you?
Children lay unresponsive in their own blood,
Some with tongues of blue,
And yet you can only create mud?
I wonder sometimes if you ran,
Too weak to stand up to your own mess.

I am not surprised,
Nor am I scared,
But, rather, synchronized
With my dying mare.
Allow me, father, to close my watering eyes;
For God’s Mercy only comes when you die.
245 · Dec 2018
I am not sick
I am not sick
I tell myself as I rip my own heart out of my chest in hopes that I can fix it

I am not sick
I call to an empty room that I am sure is full of dead relatives

I am not sick
I mumble while clutching my own two arms in bed
Leaving pitiful marks against my skin

I am not sick
I tell my mother even though she died last week
At the ripe old age of 43

I am not sick
The voices tell me as I cut off my own hands
Whispering amongst themselves as they decide whether or not to let me in on their plans

I am not sick
I assure the doctors as they frantically try to piece my arms back together

I am not sick
I tell the psychiatrist as she lays me on her couch for our very first session

I am not sick
I call to a white room full of nurses and needles, fearful of my future

I am not sick
I cry before rubber is placed into my mouth to keep me from biting my own tongue clean off during the torture

I am not sick
I remind myself at lonely meals
The people talking of things that don't exist

I am not sick
I scream at the volunteers who strapped me in the therapy chair

I am not sick
I whisper to an empty room
In nothing but a strange jacket that leaves my arms sore after it's removed

I am not sick
I mumble before I go to bed on the cold floor

I am not sick
At least, not anymore

— The End —