So like IMF
Love too has its own conditionalities
It took me so long a time to know this.
I first thought you accepted me for what i was
a poor village teacher
Who lives on nine naira and fourty kobo
(victim of our warped reward system)
But who takes solace
In turning out brains; graduates
Who may one day breeze back to campus
In sleeky cars like
Benz
BMW
Daewoo
Lexus
Pajero
Or any other flashy coffin
That moves on four legs
Experts who may one day look down on their village
Teacher and his nine naira and fourty kobo income
With disdain.
I thought you accepted me for what i was
And it meant much to me than you really could know
But one afternoon
You brought your own thesis
That lagos is where opportunities abound
Where we too could catch the silvery smile of fortune
Where like corporate masquerade i could wear tie with
Bright plumage and cuff links and tie clips and braces
And suspenders to match
And we too could ride our own sleeky car like
Benz
Bmw
Daewoo
Lexus
Or pajero
Or other elegant coffin
That walks on four legs
I gave consideration to your thesis
And i started to beg to apply for dubious jobs
In dubious establishments
I applied as chief messenger to the MD of a backwarding coy
And also as an executive market researcher in another coy
That goads people to buy what they may not need
I also applied as an expert liar who can wrap lies
In golden papers and as community relations officer
To an oil scavenger whose gluttonous phallus has defiled
Some communities’ virgin land
I begged to apply for all kinds of odd jobs in all kinds
Of odd companies to please your thesis
As luck would have it
All my prospective employers spoke with one voice.
That i may not be needed in their dubious business
First i have stayed too long
In the noble profession of turning out brains
When the experience they wanted is manufacturing lies
Second i have stayed too long in the village
To know the wily ways of lagos and port- Harcourt and
Other big cities where fortune smiles in generous ways
Third i have become the dry fish whose back may not bend
To learn new tricks
So one evening when you treated me like a failure
And chased me out in the cold
I then realised that love like IMF
Has its own conditionalities
© Lanre Adebayo