Why do I live?
I can count the number of times I've been happy on both hands.
Why don't I die?
It would be really easy to **** myself, I realise this.
But when I press the cold steel to my flesh.
I hesitate.
Death seems to be the ultimate thing I crave.
But my greatest fear.
I've spent too many nights sobbing into my pillow.
So I ask myself.
Why do I live?
I like seeing my family happy.
Why?
I like seeing my friends happy.
Why?
I like seeing anybody happy.
Why?
I hate seeing them upset.
Will I ever be truly satisfied?
I doubt it.
But, I want to try.
Why do I live?
I live not for myself. But I live for others.
Why don't I die?
Even though I don't believe it, people will be upset once I'm gone.
So when I press the cold steel to my flesh.
I put the knife away.
Death seems to be the ultimate thing I crave.
But if I let the urge completely erode me I will never be happy.
Happiness doesn't start once you die.
It happens when you learn to live.
Feb 6, 2018
Feb 6, 2018 at 12:49 PM UTC
Why do I live?
I can count the number of times I've been happy on both hands.
Why don't I die?
It would be really easy to **** myself, I realise this.
But when I press the cold steel to my flesh.
I hesitate.
Death seems to be the ultimate thing I crave.
But my greatest fear.
I've spent too many nights sobbing into my pillow.
So I ask myself.
Why do I live?
I like seeing my family happy.
Why?
I like seeing my friends happy.
Why?
I like seeing anybody happy.
Why?
I hate seeing them upset.
Will I ever be truly satisfied?
I doubt it.
But, I want to try.
Why do I live?
I live not for myself. But I live for others.
Why don't I die?
Even though I don't believe it, people will be upset once I'm gone.
So when I press the cold steel to my flesh.
I put the knife away.
Death seems to be the ultimate thing I crave.
But if I let the urge completely erode me I will never be happy.
Happiness doesn't start once you die.
It happens when you learn to live.
i wrote this at like 5 am.
