You
I keep circling your name like a wound I can’t stop touching
You appear in dreams half-lit by guilt
hands in your pockets
eyes like the edge of a mirror
You ask me what’s wrong
and I say nothing
but my whole body is confessing
I don’t know what to do to make you like me better
Every version of myself keeps dying
just to resurrect into something you might hold longer
You make me rewrite my skin
make me crave the ache of your attention
the way it burns like a prayer unanswered
And then there’s him
He texts at midnight
asks what I’m wearing
and I show him
Not because I want to
but because it’s easier than saying
I want you instead
He gives me everything you withhold
fills the silence with want
with words that drip like honey into the cracks you made
He touches me through the screen
and I let him,
pretending it’s you behind the static
He says my name
and it trembles like it means something
You say my name and it sounds like a warning
I don’t know which of you is real anymore
He arrives when he wants me
you arrive when I’m dreaming
You haunt the places my hands go
when the wanting starts to hurt
He feeds the hunger
but you are the hunger
You say you hate sharing
But disappear when I want you
But I can feel it
the way your silence claims me
the way your jealousy crawls under my skin
and sets up camp in my ribs
You don’t want me
but you don’t want me all to yourself either
And I
I want you to own me
To lock my heart behind your teeth
to brand your name across my pulse
to fill me until there’s no space left for confusion
I want your love, your anger, your exhaustion
all of it- even the parts that hurt to hold
But when he touches me
my body hums the song you taught it
Every tremor whispers your name
It’s cruel,
how you can be everywhere
except here
So I conjure you
Every night
in candlelight or in the glow of my phone screen,
I call your spirit to me
Come to me
Sometimes it works
Sometimes I think I feel your hand around my hips,
your breathing in time with my heartbeat
And sometimes
it’s him instead
real, warm, wanting
And I let him
because the spell of you never breaks
and I need something
to believe in
while I wait for you
to love me
Oct 30, 2025
Oct 30, 2025 at 12:41 AM UTC
You
I keep circling your name like a wound I can’t stop touching
You appear in dreams half-lit by guilt
hands in your pockets
eyes like the edge of a mirror
You ask me what’s wrong
and I say nothing
but my whole body is confessing
I don’t know what to do to make you like me better
Every version of myself keeps dying
just to resurrect into something you might hold longer
You make me rewrite my skin
make me crave the ache of your attention
the way it burns like a prayer unanswered
And then there’s him
He texts at midnight
asks what I’m wearing
and I show him
Not because I want to
but because it’s easier than saying
I want you instead
He gives me everything you withhold
fills the silence with want
with words that drip like honey into the cracks you made
He touches me through the screen
and I let him,
pretending it’s you behind the static
He says my name
and it trembles like it means something
You say my name and it sounds like a warning
I don’t know which of you is real anymore
He arrives when he wants me
you arrive when I’m dreaming
You haunt the places my hands go
when the wanting starts to hurt
He feeds the hunger
but you are the hunger
You say you hate sharing
But disappear when I want you
But I can feel it
the way your silence claims me
the way your jealousy crawls under my skin
and sets up camp in my ribs
You don’t want me
but you don’t want me all to yourself either
And I
I want you to own me
To lock my heart behind your teeth
to brand your name across my pulse
to fill me until there’s no space left for confusion
I want your love, your anger, your exhaustion
all of it- even the parts that hurt to hold
But when he touches me
my body hums the song you taught it
Every tremor whispers your name
It’s cruel,
how you can be everywhere
except here
So I conjure you
Every night
in candlelight or in the glow of my phone screen,
I call your spirit to me
Come to me
Sometimes it works
Sometimes I think I feel your hand around my hips,
your breathing in time with my heartbeat
And sometimes
it’s him instead
real, warm, wanting
And I let him
because the spell of you never breaks
and I need something
to believe in
while I wait for you
to love me
part ?? of an unfinished series
