Disappointment comes with being a human
I can understand the notion of not always getting what I want
Because I'm reasonable and that's life
But time and time again, I find myself begging my parents for things I'll never have
I fall to pieces and they have to glue me back together every five minutes
But they aren't enough
Their comfort isn't enough
The only temporary comfort I can find is a boy who treats me terribly
He uses me and I'm practically an object
But temporary affection is enough to satisfy my everlasting sadness
He's like a pill
An opiate
Because I go through withdrawal
And oh my god
When I am disappointed, it feels like withdrawal
Night sweats and vommiting and the chills
I ache terribly and the disappointment keeps hitting me, again and again and again
And when I'm knocked down, I'm too injured to get back on my feet safely
I fall to pieces
I seek irrational, wrong, abusive affection
I write poems that only strangers will read and maybe you'll respond
And if you don't, I might be disappointed, but it wont be anything new