I'm no comedian
I have never told a joke
when I die I want you looking for me
no impostors, no mirrors, no smoke
nobody happy to see me
no joy; you better jump at ghosts
you better be sure, I better be ash
I'm no foreign man, I feel just as important
when I am laying with dogs, as I would be with trash
there's no song and dance, I am a portent
a wormhole in the warm earth, wet dirt deterrent
merely a spec, with what grandeur in mind
indeed, to conceive the things I would design
I feel closest to dying when I'm laughing
my lungs, the lines in my face, restrict me even expressions
I feel farthest from the stage when I hear whooping and clapping
my past is all one melted blur of disgrace and transgressions
I feel decades beyond my own life away from home
and I would feel worlds away from you, even if I could feel your breath in the morning.