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D'evils Pt. 2

...a demented entity had entered me, Imposing its will relentlessly, I was moving nonsensically, Blocking blessings that were meant for me, These days I'm indecisive , And my vices are devisive, My minds a rolling pair of dice and is the opposite of what paradise is.. Never been a better time to better myself. I guess I had to go through things. Never been a better time to bet on myself. I guess its best to grow through things. I never cared - I was careless , I feared being afraid - or maybe I was afraid to be fearless, Thinking before I speak, I swallow my second guesses, Sinking beneath my feet, I wallow in expected messes, I guess I'm paradoxing, cause the problem could be possibly me, Shadowboxing , dipping, dodging , but this pain I can't see, Physically I'm fit, never been more mentally unhealthy, Crazy how this emptiness can feel so heavy.. Still, Filled to the brim, with testosterone and lighting, I remember I used to walk like thunder, these feelings I keep fighting, won't let em take me under, Cause.. Some days I be feeling cloudy with a chance, Others like I can build the twin towers with my hands, Reality is different at first glance, But this towels in my hands , washed clean ..tryin to save face, Devoured the food for thought , But I forgot to sat my grace, I can't gain from this wait, A rare form of bulimia, But belive me im breathing with the strength of bohemians, The irony is that things unfolded to this exact moment in time, I chose to dismantle MY solitude/ hopefully for something sublime, It's funny how things work/ I guess I missed the punchline, I'm at the used heart salesman/ standing in this lunch line , Missed my train of thought/ Too busy tryin to claim baggage, Playing the cards I been dealt/ With this full house , im Bob Saget...
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Written by
Legendary_Lox
30 / M
For You?
L
Written by
Legendary_Lox
30 / M
Published
Oct 17, 2023
Lines·Words
42·328
Notes

D'evils Pt. 2 speaks on the mindset I had circa 2k17/18. I felt defeated but I knew that it was only a feeling, and feelings fade over time. Yours truly , Legendary_Lox

Tags
#demons#depression#selfreflection#selfesteem#legendarylox#memoir
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