Because of you
I got a glance of my darkside,
But it got a better look at me.
It grabbed hold, and pushed until
I gave
You a second chance,
And now when the darkside I turned my back on
Stares, and glares, and dares me to turn around,
I get an itch between the matching knives.
So now I walk away
And I’ll admit, that sometimes I’m crawling,
But others I soar,
And around her I’m flying,
But I can’t take it anymore-
I’m insecure
Like a knot unraveling,
Being pulled in all the wrong directions.
I’m doubting my own decisions;
I’m the only person that I can’t trust
Because of you,
there's now this monster
that dwells eneath my skin-
in the bottom of my heart,
in the shadows of my mind,
coiled, waiting, until it can strike once again;
constrict the real me
control my tongue
burn all my bridges
with the flame of uncontrolled desires.
But the worst part is me
sitting back, enjoying every minute of it:
feeling the blood all rush to my head
in the moments before I black out-
revel in the novelty of seduction-
trample all of the shattered bonds
that held me to my friends,
and loving the crunch like broken glass-
a billion stinging cuts, draining me until
I can't take it any more-
weakening me until
I fall to the floor.
It's like I'm lying face down,
struggling just to reathe,
I'm trying to fight gravity,
but I doubt I'll succeed.
Because the silence of the tension,
is building,
it's deafening.
Clutching my hands to my ears,
I scream to drown out
the unheard torrent of emotion,
but these empty walls, and empty halls
echo, but have nothing to say.
The sunlight that was once warming
now sets my skin alight,
the heavy night is once again smothering-
the billion pinprick stars piercing my eyes,
blinding yet again.
Catching my eye, then retreating into the night,
fleeing from my sight,
the ink-black between the disappearing lights
are infecting my heart, denying me foresight,
until I wouldn't know if I was lying
when I said the future was gone.