And
I will sit in this chair and sort unneeded papers
that I can't seem to throw away
until I do
And
You flit around the kitchen making a dinner
that I will not eat because
my brain says
no he will not come back with happy thoughts on his mind
he never does
And
I will look though these meaningless sheets of history
and drop my chemistry in the waste paper basket
and my earth science from
8th grade was a good year
only 14
where hormones were only whimsical
and we laughed
at things that were silly
And
I didn't mind being caged
because I didn't know the outside world
growing up too fast
but not fast enough for the rest of
this town is smothering my beat
A not so old music binder that holds no music
just black and white spots
all potential disintegrated
And
a poem written in computer apps
while the others type,
a sad dad falls
down
a lass; a lad; fall in
love is something that throws me
because we hurt when we love
and it is against a wall
And
the floor
that I throw these unneeded sheets of scribblings
love notes written by a publishing company
and chemistry tests
down upon