This Winter I slept a lot on my couch in my TV room
As it's my main room for living and working in
And it's also the warmest room in the house
I'd be lying there with some clothes thrown over me
And with my Mom's old fur coat like a big bearskin on top of me
It'd been a tough year what with my work
I've developed a strange condition, a kind of weakness in my head
Probably from doing too much, overstretching myself...some kind of burnout thing
So now I'm always drinking herbal teas that are supposed to be good for the brain
In the hope they might ease my condition, even cure it
There's one tea I make, it's a mixture of rosemary and lavender
It's good for the circulation and bringing blood to your head, the cerebral area
Rosemary though I've discovered is a bit funny, it also affects the pelvic region
It's a feckin' aphrodisiac, it makes you horny
One night after drinking a big mugful of this concoction
I had one of my funny otherworldly type dreams
I woke up suddenly and didn't know where the hell I was
All I knew was I was horny as hell
All I can remember doing is getting up in a daze
Then putting on my mother's big fur coat
Then going outside, out onto the moors to howl at the moon
Next morning when I awoke I found myself lying on my kitchen floor
I couldn't remember a thing about the night before.
Awhile later I was down the shop and I overheard these bunch of farmers talking real anxiously among themselves
They were saying "Did you hear the terrible howling last night out on the moors
Scared all the farm animals, scared the wife and kids too, terrible it was
People say it was some kind of strange bear-like creature
We're going out tonight with our guns to hunt it down"
I looked away and thought to myself "I hope they won't be using any...any silver bullets".