Night after night
in echo-less jars my screams trapping
one after the other counting
on a shelf of shame storing
By the threads of realisations
Suffocating
Wondering
How did it go that far?
My screams trapping in jars
Scared the truth will come out
The truth of you
of my ignorance
of my wasted IQ scores
of how self-love in chapter number 6 was retracted
on how my own voice MUTED
My identity ERASED
For yours to be written as the main character of an abusive ****** mystery
The ****** of my pride
I witnessed
18 months
In your dungeon of lies trapped
Willingly...
Or Not
Nailed down by my own traumas
to a ground of your dismissiveness
nailed down under your feet
for your validation begging
in drought living
waiting for the mercy of the sporadic showers of love bombs
I didn't know I can be broken that many times
till I met you
Like a shapeshifter, 206 bones I broke
In the name of your entertainment
Consistently strained by the:
you’re not good enough
consciously thinking you'll change
unconsciously thinking that's All I deserve
And that's what scientists call submission
Submission to your mental manipulative ways
In disgust I dwell
Ashamed for being a fool
Or Not
By my own wounded child
strapped to the bed sheets that consistently
warned me about you
how every time you gently kissed me goodbye
choosing to leave me doubting myself worth
wondering how can I ever be good enough for you to stay
Yet I called you back
Willingly
or Not
Remember how
in milk and honey each insult you dipped
How in 50 roses your derogatory pet names you carefully hid
Your chains you weld tighter
After each breakup
Unconsciously it's whatever you want
it's every yes where it was supposed to be no
in pain you left me for days
only to come back for more
In pain I lived willingly
Or Not
My only crime that I was Desperate to be Loved
Jun 11, 2020
Jun 11, 2020 at 7:31 PM UTC
Night after night
in echo-less jars my screams trapping
one after the other counting
on a shelf of shame storing
By the threads of realisations
Suffocating
Wondering
How did it go that far?
My screams trapping in jars
Scared the truth will come out
The truth of you
of my ignorance
of my wasted IQ scores
of how self-love in chapter number 6 was retracted
on how my own voice MUTED
My identity ERASED
For yours to be written as the main character of an abusive ****** mystery
The ****** of my pride
I witnessed
18 months
In your dungeon of lies trapped
Willingly...
Or Not
Nailed down by my own traumas
to a ground of your dismissiveness
nailed down under your feet
for your validation begging
in drought living
waiting for the mercy of the sporadic showers of love bombs
I didn't know I can be broken that many times
till I met you
Like a shapeshifter, 206 bones I broke
In the name of your entertainment
Consistently strained by the:
you’re not good enough
consciously thinking you'll change
unconsciously thinking that's All I deserve
And that's what scientists call submission
Submission to your mental manipulative ways
In disgust I dwell
Ashamed for being a fool
Or Not
By my own wounded child
strapped to the bed sheets that consistently
warned me about you
how every time you gently kissed me goodbye
choosing to leave me doubting myself worth
wondering how can I ever be good enough for you to stay
Yet I called you back
Willingly
or Not
Remember how
in milk and honey each insult you dipped
How in 50 roses your derogatory pet names you carefully hid
Your chains you weld tighter
After each breakup
Unconsciously it's whatever you want
it's every yes where it was supposed to be no
in pain you left me for days
only to come back for more
In pain I lived willingly
Or Not
My only crime that I was Desperate to be Loved
"Stat: On average, a woman will leave an abusive relationship seven times before she leaves for good"
