When I cry I tell myself it's just the smoke from the cigarette in my eyes because I don't like to cry, these are my weakest times. I can't even breath lately, it's like the world doesn't want me to. The world wants me to suffer, to drown, at worst to die. The crazy thing is I know when I started to fall. I fell and instead of catching me the one I love pushed me. He's the reason my demons are in power and I'm helpless lately.