I wish I could cry.
I wish I could take back words that come from my head and mouth
I wish I could curl up into a ball, and maybe my future self could reassure me that maybe I still have a chance.
Just to know that even if I'm failing now, time and time again will I know nothing but failure, that I'll succeed once.
Just to hear that would keep me ease until then. I'd be able to keep my upbeat personality and charm people think I have up. Maybe I'd find it's actually real
But that won't happen
I won't ever know for sure until it happens
And that's not likely in my state
I wish I could cry