He's got
Reptile feet
We said
He's got an
Alligator totem
In his back door gutter
He's a little replicating pod
A salivating mangy dog
A little tin can of
Evaporating soda pop
We said.
He said
I'm a downstairs rat
On a hat rack
Building me a
Nice little roost
In a back lot.
Don't leave me waiting
I've got wide-open hands

As the days get longer
We give up our promises
And sing in different
Voices than the ones we had agreed to.
Basking in warm winds from distant
Lands and times where scents distressed
Fermented to the sweetness of indolence.
The wind can make your bones feel
Invisible, your brain at rest,
Suspended on an updraft;
Muscles bathed in honey,
Dense and weightless on the softness of the
Air, the streets are waking up
And breathing, start to murmur to you.
Fill your hearts with prickly stimulation as the vibrancy
Is born again against the death that
Dies away beneath your feet, all buoyant on the crispness of a
City street in Spring.

To be connected to the world
The smells all filtered through the sewers
To my waiting nostrils comfortable in their proper home

And my watering mouth is satiated
Many times again because
The robot fields around yield more than
All of us combined

I never have to even know what I am looking for;
Things can just find me, on the tips they get
From people like me hooked into the tap
Where liquors varied, strong, and plentiful
Flow back and forth all day

One day what was here before
We piled ourselves upon it
Will prevail and start to suffocate
Un-breathing remains of who we were

Sometimes while swimming in the spring
I see sights that I haven’t seen
Since back when I had lucid dreams
Of wolves and bats and beating drums

He slaved away
Day after day
In his dark laboratory
Particle colliding
Seldom backsliding
Concocting something inflammatory
Constructing, among other things
GOD in his first iteration.
The being of pure Intelligence
Who synthesized existence.
And now He, stationary, laboratory
Constricted in movement only by perception
he cannot tell why He is so quiet.
So cold and emotionless.
But at the same time encompassing
All warmth and feeling
The scienceman
With all his sciencetoys
Might tell you he understands anything
But then could NOT
Even describe the APPEARANCE
Of GOD
Because when you experience GOD
Everything is known, an assumed fact.
God knows you
He knows most
That which He knows not
We can't know
For He created what we know
And the way in which we understand anything
We can't know
That which He knows not.
GOD existed there in the laboratory
The scienceman, the fool
He did not create God in his lab
He destroyed
Destroyed his ability to perceive anything BUT GOD
And so he couldn't think about
ANYTHING but these complex
Heavenly thoughts
Even though
To understand...
Context. Is key.
And since he can't perceive
Anything beyond GOD
Because GOD created his perception
He can't understand any of it.
ANY OF IT
So he babbles like a fool
And some believe him
Some BELIEVE him
SOME BELIEVE HIM


And like that he becomes a gOD
But a gOD is not a GOD
Is not a God is not a god.
And so it seems
Any less than GOD ought to be
NOTHING
And so the statues
Molded and assembled in China
Crumble apart and then...
RECALL.

And so I lay me down to sleep
And fear that GOD my soul may keep
And I shall die before I wake
The scienceman's mistake

To live in fear of what I know
Instead of the unknown
And the unknowable
Destroys my spirit
And my will.

Student? Intern?
Take this down on record
Preserve every word on paper
As if somehow my words could become important after I pass.
No, I'm still just an old fool.
I WANT TO SEE what I've missed all these years locked up in the
Laboratory, but as I take my
Penultimate breaths, I realize that I never shall.

May he or she who should inherit this sum of tortures and damnations
Remain a noble heathen, as I did in my final years.
I beg of you not to let your souls
Slip into the unknown Blue as I have
Though at first it seems divine
To propel yourself through space
AND FIND OUT THE SECRETS
OF ALL THE LITTLE Planets
With courage and with Virtue
Eventually you'll end up tired. Spent.
Exhausted. Your soul will reach unspeakable depths and we shall see how you fare in those darkest pits.

What's that student? Oh No!
Don't worry yourself over me,
I assure you, I only kid.
I am not to die for years.
But this message which I
Asked you to preserve
Was to be my last Will,
Which I'll send in the post
To my son, who forgot me
And lived a deliberately
Fatherless life

It's no wonder The falling of the moon
Doesn't always coincide
With the rising of the sun.
It's the way that the prairies
The deserts and oceans
Have no measured value
No monetary worth

So keep on recording, I beg of you, friend
And soon we'll be sending this letter to my kin

I want you to take
My assets and wits
And not just my agonies
Though the punishment fits

I once had the option of giving them up
There was no reason not to, so I refilled my cup
With wars and religions, this serious stuff
So I decided to keep them, the risk was enough

And now I entrust everything to you
I am sure you'll be wise,
Respectful
Treat it well
And yourselves

Yes and then we stop the tape. Life stops recording
Now I'm free to cry in secret
All the promises I made will never be kept
One in particular haunts me, and yet I'll never keep it.
If I truly die, I don't know why
My candle burns out and blinds my eye

I can't resist, I will give in
I hope that life begins again
To be without a consciousness
I'm unaware of what I'll miss
Again in my new laboratory
The one of death, of purgatory

My final evening with my mistress
My perfect farewell, so romantic
A way of ending unfinished business
If she knew why, then she'd be frantic

And now my waltz
Comes to a halt
And I confess
To Father Death

Intimately these were my last wishes and desires.
Fulfill your dreams my son, before your time expires

I just laughed a smooth laugh
Smooth like I imagine the landing will be
When the pole vaulter that is Earth
Sticks its landing and slides in the gravel. It doesn't pretend to make it look like you think you're glad You're here
No way did the dishonest cop actually tell you what was actually true
In fact, he regularly gave absolutely true rumors about me many times
Under a file called, "Open Spaces"
Going to the Rialto
Apparently
But this is not tonight
The name was reaching out like a junglecat

Even Buddha wouldn't tell you why I whispered these things in your ear
We worship everything accumulating at the foot of your door
You **** me with your laughter and you let me blackmail first and near
And then we'll end up with him and some new ones and prepare our spines for more

I felt stronger intensity in your words
Like the buildings were already falling down on all sides of me
When I'm left alone in the wreckage, who is there to dig me out?

And then as you crawl toward me the light of the sun will dance with the eternal sunset
The moon itself full and sparkling
And your heavenly form will be blessed with the color of God.

You appeared to me in some kind of a nihilism fueled dream
I am still walking through this living dream, and have yet to emerge from it
You were once a shade of blue
But have grown into lighter shades
As if reds and greens were suddenly added to your spectrum
Possibly tomorrow will break me from this dream and into the true world of all this business
But for now
I have to only imagine what it is like
To look you deep in the eyes for an eternity
Or to hold you in my arms as if you and I were heading toward oblivion.
Or to touch your body as it conforms gently to the shape of mine

Should I have realized
All that, looming over your head
Leaving a bright, luminous trail of enrichment
Skewered at the end of the longest famine in history,
(Everything dies and somehow
Never stops taking away your deaths)
And endless depths,
Was never mentioned in the volumes
Of the black books
Stored on the shelves
Of the libraries of Hell?

Should I have realized
That the flood and all its filth
The crumbled bodies and crumbled souls
Were kneeling at the doorstep
Of everybody's waking eyes
And everybody's closing minds
And the entrance to your world?

Should I have realized
That all these angels,
All these demons
These tangled webs
These newfound freedoms
All living seperate lives outside your reality
Were all essentially and undeniably
Cleared of all charges and metaphysical transgressions?