“Strawberry Moon”

Not all monsters are the same

As not all scars are born with pain,

Some are dews left on grasses

When the cold night fades away,

Some are the beautiful stories

That we just have to say.

I See the good in people

The sugar sweetness in their voice

Their words

It stains

It burns through me

my clothes

My tender cold heart

My eyes, nose, ears

especially my mouth

a sickly sweetness engulfs my senses

I like it?

Takes away my cold pain

Takes me away

chocolate chip cookies were delicious.

i’d usually eat them on the bed. it was comfier that way.

they were sweet, they dulled my senses and made me numb.

the chocolate would stain the bed and seep into the soft comforter.

when i’d clean my sheets, i’d be reminded of those cookies. it made me feel good,

like i had done something right- living life to the fullest and enjoying myself.

whenever i eat a cookie now, i throw up. it was never right. it’s not justified.

It stained my soul

The weight of the world

Sweet on your tongue

Tasteless in its reason

The night on my floor

And the red stain on the carpet

Thought you were the one

I could not have been more wrong

My heart stained forever

The absence of bitterness is sweetness.

Laughing and talking eating our ice cream

Chocolate dripping down my face and falling onto my shirt

My Brightest colored shirt I do t usually wear bright colors

I like black a lot I don't enjoy the colors you see in life nor do I see them

My mindset changed though when I met you

I could see rainbows after it rained

The chocolate stained my shirt

You grabbed a napkin and tried wiping it off

It stained

I washed that shirt when I got home the stain was gone

Not my love for you

I woke up this morning

And cried at the sight

Of your strawberry lipgloss

Blessing my pillow

And I gagged in the shower

Because the only shampoo

I had was your

Strawberry vanilla scent

And at the grocery store

I broke down as I passed strawberries

And a worker had to ask

If I was okay

And I had to lie and say I was

Because she couldn’t see

The stain you left

On me

i suppose holding onto a hope that wouldn't stand

and lasted by lust, care, and obssession

has left a futile taste of figs

My strawberry moon,

The stain lay upon your back,

Purple, for our pinks and blues.

The hue reminds me of you.

The flash of purple when you blink,

Your flustered face, pink.

It's blue when you push me to the brink.

To experience the desperate clinging of your arms around me,

A new, unfaded stain,

Please, may you unfold upon forever tomorrows.

The sweetness left, but not too soon,

it lingers in the strawberry moon.

A blush of red, a faded hue,

a stain of all I thought I knew.

I cannot taste those days again,

but still they bloom beneath my skin—

like berry marks that won’t wash clean,

like summer lost, but softly seen.

the sweetness of your smile

it stained my mind with naughtiness

it gives me ideas that flash

through my skin

She was red

Like the sky

When the clouds

Bleed.

She was tart

Like a shard

Of the glass

That I swallowed

When she

Walked by.

Where did she go?

My teeth, coated with sticky orange candy, Goddamned, circus peanuts

I still remember the taste of your lips by the stain of pinkish lipstick smeared on your face,

I still remember the way you held me every time I take a sip of a warm cup of tea,

I still remember the way you looked into my eyes, but maybe I was overthinking it.

I remember how you got me, I didn't have to say anything.

Running into the sun like hunting raffle tickets at the fair, summers breezing past

sweet father

standing in the moonlight,

holy halo aura

swallowed into eternity

you left your mark

your children, your example

that stain will never disappear

Horror movies

Only slashers can buy that sweetness

The late nights remedied

By the marathon laps of darkness

Hollowing out my everything,

But empty eyes

And reflected in them

You can see it all.

The sin of creation

Everywhere I go,

The shapeless nature of this reflection

Hovers in the shape of an echo

They all grasp at my shadows

While my phantom lies naked

I drag the limbs tethered,

For selves I cannot become

They all walk by this formless creation

As I stitch the skin born from eternal damnation.

Was I the sin of immortal creation?

The maker of this evil rose

As the womb bore this sinful creation.

Oh God, how can you be responsible?

To the emerging of such innate

deprivations.

Tears of joy

Of pain

Leave behind

An invisible stain

Upon the heart

On the soul

Dragging down

The seeker's goal

Once so bright

Now unrecognized

Falling back

Stained by design

Sweet and sour,

A taste to relish,

The strawberry moon,

On my birthday cake,

Everyone wanted a piece.

i look back into places of those before me

i remember memories, happy memories with those before me.

i day dream it every day. hoping it lasts forever.

but good things always come to an end.

i remember how the stain of those memories fills my heart with sweetness.

how i feel my eyes tear slowly.

i push it back, tell myself that i don't care.

nevertheless they do not care.

my memories are fading, leaving slowly.

i hold back my heart, knowing I'll have to hold it for now or forever.

there was a time when grey met green,

the serendipity within

absorbed into the leaden skin

forever

and as the years would take their toll,

that thought, it wouldn’t cede control,

fighting reason and rhyme for all

or nothing

The death of my father who I fought with in his last days was and still is my hero and the stain of my guilt for the way I behaved.