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Aug 2011 · 744
birthday
samuel nathan Aug 2011
Yesterday
I had a birthday that was not
a birthday
went places i did not know
met people i did not know
walking walking waiting
more walking
to finally get in
to not be able to move, speak
playing tail but getting none
some fool who seems to be
having a better time then me
gets kicked out on his kicked ***
screaming obscenities from busted lips
smoked all my cigarettes
to filter to the end
to no end
but the day did not end
on the roof with roaches
then onto the street with socialites
then back on the roof
I guess i must be a lonely individual
or maybe there is something
missing
could be why no one is listening
they come stay here
but do not have the courtesy
to stay here
i do not feel im entitled to anything
i just like being informed
of when im to be ignored
or forgotten
maybe
i should have forgotten
my birthday
Aug 2011 · 819
a night in haikus
samuel nathan Aug 2011
make my drink stronger
onward to hedonism
ethics? for the birds.

a swing and a miss
when everything is amiss
for a single kiss.

would not miss the sun
if the sun would stop rising
the muse: the bebop

here there is no line
waiting is for drunken fools
come along its free
Aug 2011 · 412
turn tail or
samuel nathan Aug 2011
or … just hop. skip. jump.
hit walls. go thump.
fight those frightening things at night.
go bump.
plant seeds. turn leaf.
get cut down.
go stump.
Aug 2011 · 1.7k
kung fu
samuel nathan Aug 2011
And
i find myself sitting
drinking smoking
the saving grace
late night Kung Fu
on the television
white lotus clan style
against my swooping crane
defending honor
defining lip syncing
dignity left sinking
carefully choreographed madness
graceful
and somehow greatly unappreciated
they talk of honor and nobility
over tea
while
they talk of nonsense over spirits
fire in the holy temple
fire at the end
of my cigarette
as the fastest the eldest the master
returns to reign down vengeance
beckoning begging for a challenge
none to be found
bar none
in bar in land in tale
art in martial form
smiling like a school boy
bringing this certain soulless individual
joy
Aug 2011 · 514
a reason to wait in line
samuel nathan Aug 2011
the beautiful girl at the counter
smiles back shining
cold bold eyes of blue
as she presents cold water on rocks
no coffee in this cafe
i can not help but tip her
for
how i do love coffee shop girls
perhaps particularly this one
ironic because i do not drink
***** brown bean water
but im drawn to the maker
and the only interaction
i have with her
is momentary
making living
in the moment more important
but the line must move
if all the rest of them
enjoyed the moment with
her
as i did
she would truly be happy
would i were her
would i were able to
share that joy
for a moment
this ****** dark marble counter
proves the purpose given it
separating us
her eyes tell me
"drink fast
return for another
moment"
Aug 2011 · 430
they who are important
samuel nathan Aug 2011
they who are important
say write every day
so they say
i did not write yesterday
earth below did not
split open and swallow me
sky did not
rain black acid
i just feel terrible
tired
nothing done out of ordinary
only
nothing written
this will not be the end
keep common cursed words
flowing pouring
cease not a source of joy
pen massaging paper
messages from mind
were words to rest
rust
so they say
write every day
they who are important
Aug 2011 · 722
Ena
samuel nathan Aug 2011
Ena
I walk out the back door of my apartment
to have a smoke headphones on
music full volume
my back porch is the same size as my apartment:
small
there is only enough room for a small table,
holds only a drink and an ashtray,
and my favorite beach chair
I dance my way
to that familiar green yellow blue red resting place
as I sit, Beethoven's third or fourth assaulting my ears,
i turn to my left
there across the white railing
on the porch adjacent stands
the most beautiful woman I have ever seen or dreamed
she has been watching me
not smiling more a look of amusement
as one watching caged beings at the zoo
through those white bars she watched
this poor fool monkey dance his way
through habitat habits
without thinking
i fling the headphones off my ears and
meet eyes with her
I say nothing for a brief moment truly lost in the blue
hers are blue
the purest ive never seen before
my mouth decides to speak
    "Ha! Im sorry…I…uh, I thought no one lived there,
    I mean, I…I thought there was no one else out here."
I laugh.
She blinks, says, "I just moved in this morning."
    "Oh, OK. Well ****, welcome to the neighborhood."
I go to the railing and extend my hand
(animal reaching for treat)
    "Im Sam."
    "Ena"
She does the same
(presenting treat) and we share
a polite hand shake
normally, I might ask where she was from
what she likes music movies but,
I cannot seem to find the words to say
to this one
not only her beauty her energy
her way is what stays my tongue
her name. Ena. Fire. echoing in my head.
what the hell am I to say?
i want to know everything about her all at once
the curse of a facile tongue
but then she says,
    "I liked your dancing. It made me glad to know
    there are still some humans beings living here."
she smiles
this poor fool monkey's heart and soul jolt awake
a more wonderful and beautiful thing
has never been said before and
that is all it took
Aug 2011 · 911
caving
samuel nathan Aug 2011
caved in
while caving
a cast away
ten feet to move
any which way
no way out
with my pen
this note pad
and a corner
to pout
says my sad self
says my strong self
lets get the **** out
Aug 2011 · 965
how to invite myself
samuel nathan Aug 2011
what to do
when there is a party next to you
situation finds me
on my back porch
if that is the right word for it
loud music loud voices loud energy
flooding in from porch adjacent
how to invite myself
i could knock i could walk in
i could come baring gifts
i could open my door
doubling the statistical advantage
of a good time
i could brush my teeth
i could hide the week old laundry
i could start a game
i could make them smile
i could meet a girl i could marry her
i could find magic in
their refrigerator magnets
or
i could  write this poem
wishing only listening
glistening regret
and smoke this cigarette
Aug 2011 · 557
patterns
samuel nathan Aug 2011
the reason i travel home
the same way
every day
the reason i write
without light
every night
the reason i smoke against
surgeon generals warning
every morning
the reason i go somewhere
with same face
every **** place
the reason i drop it
trip and treason
every season
the reason i agitate
age and accept
what happens here
every year
the reason i must
make a mess if i own it
every moment

— The End —