We all care but do we care enough?
She had such good things
but also too many that were rough.
Too many thoughts made her cry
too many people didnt care enough
so then alone, she died.

“I’m pretty sure they write books about the kind of love we have”

perplexity* is loving someone that you maybe shouldn’t.

perfection is the way you would scrunch up your nose when I spoke.

beauty is missing you when everyone says that I can’t.

enthralling
that’s you, absolutely and totally enthralling. fascinating, important. perfect.

the delight of emotional rhythms
in a song that explains everything
the feeling of choking
but in a way of pleasure
from reading some article of writing
that jerks more happy tears than sad
the magnetic pull to someone
that equally balances your life
*this is my euphoria

And I got caught in the rain,
nothing like a few sky teardrops to hide my pain.

but my feelings are stupid
I can't understand them at all.
so that's when I curse the leaves,
with them, I fall

Many people think fall is sad
However I don't think Fall is all that bad

Death of grass and leaves is not the object of focus during the Fall
There are things like colors and leaves around you
Now the good things, don't you see them all?

do you feel it too?






feel the falling like I do?

round and round
actually, it's pretty slow
but when it's all done,
I don't really know where to go.

the wind in my hair,
a smile on my face
and that's when I think,
"why would I ever leave this place?"

papers will burn eventually
their fire will rise
it will hush the smoke
because it always gets the credit

Flames*
The embers of love grow into flames

After that marriage and baby names

What am I meant to do when my donut buddy has started something new?

deep in the night, when reality is out of my sight, ((though its blurred anyway)), I see you. You’re there. Through the haze wondering of sweet things and pretty days. No, you don’t see me, but I can see you. Your eyes, a beautiful night sky with stars made of dew. I watch carefully from a far not wanting to ***** you away, and I swear I could wonder about you all day. You’re a beautiful creature too far to touch, but maybe again I’m asking too much. I can see your sadness, yes it’s there, and there’s nothing I can do but kind of just stare. You’re beautiful baby, darling, oh dear, I just wish you knew I were here.

I write too much about being sad
like a broken camera, my focus is bad.
For once, tonight I will write of joy
and how when I blush I think, oh boy.
I will tell of the people I really like
but not right now, not tonight.

when i was a clumsy toddler
of course you caught me when i fell.

when i had grown a little,
i remember well,
you held onto me while we slept,
so i wouldn't fall off of the couch to the blue carpet.

now, as I'm older,
you don't catch me as much.
Thank you for not always catching me when i fall,
but rather helping me pull myself back up to stand when i land.

i think that's maybe more important.

there are more than 100 Billion stars

and yet

you shine brighter than them all.

I'm running faster and faster
and I end up getting nowhere
everyone thinks I have this simple life
oh please.

When things break,
if the pieces are big enough
you can fit them back together
to create something whole once more.
The thing is,
I don’t know,
do. not. have. a. clue.
how to break beautifully.
I don’t know how to shatter perfectly,
into a million pieces
so that when a person passing by
maybe cares enough to open the curtain
to shine sunlight on me,
my pieces will shimmer and glisten
beautiful glass in the sun.

But I don’t know,
I just do not know,
how to break beautifully.

Have you ever had that
"I'm sitting here with no clue"
kind of feeling after
you thought you had just cleansed yourself of
everything in the shower?
And have you ever
well
hoped that that's exactly what you had done?
Saying goodbye to everything as it went down the drain.
Have you ever just sat in your bed,
shower thoughts filling your mind
when nothing is even on your mind at all?
Begging, pleading, silently waiting
for a word or a hint of one
to escape from your open mouth.

This is what happens when you become glazed,
but not a donut.

it’s hopeless because he likes Kaidin

shake the frozen dew off yourself

wait for that sun to make you new

grow and thrive! that's my advice

though it isn't easy, flowers look nice

Love
grows.

Do me this one favor, dearest reader:
read that again.

Love grows.
Like maybe a type of flower.?

It can start out as nothing and
then bloom into something so beautiful.

Love grows.
Maybe outward.?

A womb of a mother,
growing, growing, outward.

Love grows.
Maybe, and sadly, apart.?

Outward, Inward, Apart, and Up.
Just let my love be enough?

sickness and poison once ate at her chest
illness took over her kind face and she began to age before her time.
can you imagine the trauma? probably not.
the blackness and the vines that enclosed her,
the white rooms, blinding lights
the sunken face and the worry still.
all proves that she's strong, wouldn't you think?
that she's grown, an adult woman.
but she's with this demon
his hair is red because it was the devil's favorite color.
his smile is wicked and his eyes are cold with everyone he meets.
she sees this cold, wicked hell.
there's no love. only using and abusing
so may I say this
I love you
I hate him
We all do
so find that strength that beat the scariest darkness
and
Grow. Up.

it's really hilarious that
I spend my time trying to
make you smile when you're sad.
yet all you've done,
is ignore me and
that makes me feel bad.
you're welcome though I guess,
because my heart is stupid
and it loves you nonetheless.

Well hello Abigail!
You look gorgeous, it's true.
Your smile and laugh really fits you.
Even though you fret or stress about your hair being undone,
it doesn't take away from you, always a load of fun.
I really love you, like a lot.
You make me happy even if I'm not.

Today you grow older,
Though it may not seem
And I'll try to sing a song to you
but phone conversations aren't my sort of thing.
Dad I love you beyond words and I just pray
that prayers, love, and kindness,
surround you on this special birthday.

Wish I were there to celebrate with you!

Believe me when I say that
I love you
because boy it sure is the truth.
I love how one look
in my eyes allows you
to read my emotions and make me feel better.
I love how your
sighs and shrugs make me laugh
as we walk through a too
crowded store.
I love that even when our time
with each other is over,
I hold on to every second
of our hug, as I feel you do the same.
I love how you get me
every word, look, or laugh
we share a heart and a mind
and I love you for that.

have you ever thought
that i might have my problems
that i cant deal with this anymore
or that when i take a walk
im running away from my house
but not my home?

Tomorrow the sun will rise
just as it has
Oh so many times
but the storm will run its course tonight
words as rain, more like tears of pain
and it just so happens that she just might....
*dance in the dampness of her heartstorm with delight.

I could talk to you all night,
about yourself, in my heart,
and you'd never even know.

I got a henna tattoo.
It’s a cute infinity sign with “forever” written as part of it. it’s in cursive.

I got it because it fascinates me.
How forever is a small part of infinity and how neither should have to exist. Nothing lasts that long.

Except love and hatred.
I have the one that makes me sick to my stomach when you’re sad and I can’t fix it.