while we lay
If I could,
I would rearrange the stars in our likeness
a presentation seen from every galaxy
even the moon and sun would envy what we displayed
with stargazers and planets as our audience
they would look upon our constellation and say
[this is love]

If I drew us together
the lines would connect
it would make sense
shade the parts we didn't want anyone to see
keep those behind thick lines for just you and me
highlight the smiles
and detail the way I look into your eyes
draw us and the way we hold hands
the way your thumb brushes over mine
I think we'd make a perfect picture
like in your written scripture
it would be just us two

There's so much everywhere
and I can't find the time
with you not around
it feels like I'm starting to go blind
I can't see you in the morning
I can't see if I'll be here very long
it feels like our home is in mourning
it moves in gathered sighs
she moves in slow steps
and I choose to lay here
maybe if I stand still enough
I'll just disappear
I'll meet you up there
hopefully I'm the one that saves our seats

a waste of space
deprived of compassion and dry of sympathy
a pathetic example of absent empathy
drowning in expectation
of things unfathomable to a shallow mind
complex thoughts
all in intricate design

but if I am ignorant I am happy
I'm happy- I meant ignorant
Maybe I'm ignorant about my happiness
Or happy that I'm ignorant
I'm really not sure anymore

I'm scared that one day I won't have anything to offer to you
my kisses won't be as sweet
my hand won't hold as tight
my hugs won't be as warm
and the words I tell you won't sound right,
that my love would no longer please you
and you'd wish to look elsewhere
I'm scared that one day I'll run out of things to give you
that you won't accept what it is I desire to give
I'm scared of all this and the thought of not being with you