Nolan Bucsis

Nolan Bucsis May 2019

I am chased by a ravenous past.

It obliterated right now.

And tomorrow.
Has slipped away into the sublimation of amnesia.

Where I rest.
In a desecrated hollowed out holy land.

Nolan Bucsis May 2019

Truth is

I just feel like dying
Almost everyday.
And I'm alone.
Listless.
Vacant.

Nolan Bucsis May 2019

Boop

In these in-between neurotic phases I wonder what went wrong with me.
When did I stop living.
Tomorrow too far away.
Today too mundane.
And I have a long list.
Of could have beens.

Nolan Bucsis Apr 2019

Presented with no Editing

My mind is filled with a frenzied frustration when I take the time to.
Think.
About.
Anything.
More.
Than wasting my time with overt over stimulation, just occupying time with this.
Distraction.
This.
Meandering.
Nothing.
That does nothing but fill me up with dread that I've wasted everything trying to get high.
Just.
Silencing.
That.
Voice.
Inside my head that repeats a neurotic mantra of give up, give in, give a ****.
Anything.
To.
****.
Silence

Nolan Bucsis Apr 2019

I member

I woke up in right now.
When I was really back there.
Apprehensive and afraid.

Nervous that nothing would pan out.

Never did.
Never was gonna be anything magnificent.
Not even mediocre.
Just a failed.
Life.

Nolan Bucsis Apr 2019

#17

We're all so absent.
Crying in tandem to our dying dreams.
Please.
Come back.
From so far out there you float in miasma.
Give us back our hope.
The things that get us through our days.
Our cherished.
Memories.

But the empty don't dream.

Nolan Bucsis Apr 2019

An idiots illiteration

My life has been wasted.
On wasting time.
Waiting for a wonder.
To weave into my life.

A
Better.

Story to sell.
A soliloquy or something.
More succinct.
Some kinda so called solution.

To.
My.

Feeble mind frantically.
Finding faults.
With my forlorn failure.
My fragile forgetfulness.

It's
Just.

My memory keeps me moving.
Measuring the minutes.
Making me melancholy.
And meaning left.

Nowhere to be
Found