I can feel the bullet powering through my skull.
And.
The infinite release of negation.
There I am.
In my mind.
With this familiar refrain.
To alleviate the frustration.
To correct the mistake.
That is me.
All life is.
Is suffering without end.
Failed dreams.
Slowly decaying into infirmity.
Wouldn't it be so nice.
For that millisecond of transition into something black.
Forever.
Something empty.
Forever.
It's not like it matters.
It's not like I matter.
No one does.
So I fantasize a cold steel grey barrel pressed firmly against my temple.
And.
One.
Millisecond.
Then.
Red.
Against the wall.