Explosions of Colors,
Clashing and bright-
Giving me headaches
Harassing at night.
The Chattering of Birds
Noisy and high
Lacking a rhythm
And crowding the sky

Eyes closed, ears shut-the jolts-screams-splashes-jeers-spirals-pounding-faces future-people-fear- noise Noise NOISE-

and then…
it rains

and the world is painted blue
and no one can control it,
and there is nothing left to do.

I wish that I was small-
small enough to climb
into your ear
and into
your head

Once I am in your head
I can touch your brain
kissing it all,
making it
better

I could fix all the pain
the pain that sits there
and lingers on
even when
lips meet

I feel so helpless, love
that I can’t fix it
like I’m meant to
with only
my love.

So I wish to be small
to live on your brain
and keep you safe
from all that
haunts you.

I lay in the bed across from you.
How could I not have heard
your gasps of air,
your sobs,
leaking from you
like blood leaks
from a dying body?

I pretended that I was asleep,
That I was somewhere else
lost in a dream-
too far
to hear the sound
of crumbling
as you melted away.

I can sit here, yes?
You don’t mind.
You hold me, not trembling.
I think if I just breathe,
you understand
and leak your strength into me
starting with my bare toes
all the way into my brain.
You let me rest.

May I live here, please?
Just us two.
You and I, lovely and free.
I think if I’m alone,
I’ll be myself
and find life within myself
starting with my red heart
leaking to my pale face.
We’ll be okay.

“Pass me the salt”-
    screeches of metal on glass,
    tinkling glasses
    crunching and chewing and slurping
No one says a word.

Staring at plates
    smeared with the residue,
    covered with crumbs
    everything running together
Avoiding all eyes.

Sometimes,
it is less lonely
to sit in solitude
than at the family dinner table.