Last letter to Maya

Maya ,
I could hear the living
as i closed my eyes....
while when opened ignorance was a godly gift

A godly gift
of every man
ignorance liketh thee
as thou liketh ignorance
And as i am ignorant
         as ignorant i am

Maya,
I don't care for myself
as i thought i am no mortal
just as ignorance..,
'Twas stupidity

Maya ,
I am fed up
Discomforted , numb , beaten down ,
scars of lashes upon my woven back..
Woven with silk but covered by calluses of burdensome
I heave of being tired
every time i close my eyes

Maya,
'Twas the day i saw the beach
In sand i stood as i heaved for forgiveness
I walked to water
and found Im no God

I closed my eyes,
what a beautiful sight
I closed my eyes and heard the living,
It said .......

About the girl in yellow


Not so long ago,
I met a friend of my own
We had a time of short
where we explained each other what we saw.

Grey or white buildings in the horizon she said
Endless night skies i replied
The gang of vagabonds blabbered about ***** and women inside
whilst the vagabond outside blabbered to a girl in ecstasy

Quarrels and intervals came along
Not for long but for eternity i thought
The way i missed it, i missed it like none other
They way i cried about it, i cried about it like none other

Then came the mystic fog
Blurred up the past even the future for both of us
but at present i had a lamp
for me the fog was clear

Then there came a time i stumbled upon a friend i thought was long lost
Now she meant something more
As i knew i saw her inner light
Now it reflected on me as to guide me in the nightstorm

A storm so dark and dusty
as i coughed and cried my lungs out, preaching to the all known for a better way out
The light, the inner one took me and put me aside as an irish selki

Now i see in a better state
Better worse or better good yet to find out
Nonetheless iam calm as i hear her whispers

Breeze in my hair
I exhale and inhale good air
Unpredicted lustful reactions in me as i hear each word.
Maybe of grief or of gold it tickles in all of me

When i dream i am her
I think like her
I move like her
I talk and i hug and i kiss like her to myself
Here, i am no different
theres no shame in being a feminine while masculine
I am the way i dreamt about you
The way i thought
About the girl in yellow.