si te me preguntes hoy
no sé que si puedo decir la verdad
no sé que si tengo el poder
es posible que todavía te quiero

tenemos oportunidad en estos años
tenemos suerte cuando tocamos las estrellas
no entendemos lo que puedan hacer
a nuestros vidas pequeñas

si te me preguntes hoy
quieres ver la luna
yo sé que tengo el poder de decir
ya la ví.
en tus ojos, no más

i don't like you and i never have
your constant attacks
the way that you make me feel fat
and frustrated
and clumsy.
and i don't understand why we call each other
the best of friends because
you're always prepared,
goggles on oxygen tank pumping
to jump down my throat for the smallest something.
you make us argue
all i try to do is share with you
you make me feel weak when i need to feel
empowered and supported
and i wish i wasn't friends with you.
what if i never knew you
but then an acronym would go to waste
and leave our girls with a sour taste.
sometimes i do hate you
that's a lie that's mostly true.

bottling fame
standing behind the paragon of the light
hate in his eyes
brewing glory
standing behind the epitome of evil
hate in his heart
putting a stopper in death
memories from his mind
into a flask of
her
making.

when someone dies
and they have no one to miss them
when the choose to go
or when the world chooses for them
and they have no one to mourn them
it's our job
that's why
some days you feel the despair
the waves of sadness
from the ocean of humanity
far away disturbances of life.
so next time you feel
that urge to tug at your hair
complain on your tumblr
ignore your friends.
the next time you glimpse
the cursed life of the chronically depressed
the forever sad,
be at peace
for there is a soul, somewhere
now at rest.
and you are in mourning for them.

it's on nights like these
that i wish for your
sticky sweaty skin
against mine.

it's on nights like these
that i remember the feeling of your laughter
my head on your chest, your body
against mine.

it's on nights like these
that i want your smile directed
at no one but me, your heart
against mine.

it's on nights like these
that i miss the battles of verbiage
our cute little fights, your wit
against mine.

it's on nights like these
that i wonder why we thought we didn't work
as a couple because your mind still isn't
against mine.

it's on nights like these
that i'm taken back to our first kiss
shut your eyes, lips tentatively
against mine.

it's on nights like these
that i can't sleep
that my bed feels too big
my head feels too small
and i miss you.

there have been days i walked on the clouds
every syllable falling from my lips
a joyous prayer, hope from my toes to my fingertips.
there have been days when the darkness inside of me threatened to
manifest itself
with demons whispering their twisted logic
as sick as
the manifest destiny.
there have been days i picked at the threads binding my soul to
yours
wishing for a scissor to cut straight through them.
there have been days that my only solace was a book
a world
a dream of my creation.
there have been days that until exhausted
my mind wouldn't couldn't stop
running.
there have been days where your hands are all i want to hold
but i'm left with my broken
angry
heart weighing down my palms.
there have been days i wish you understood
the pain the rejection the loneliness.
there have been days of prayer
of contemplation
of watching the fire in warm darkness
your tears falling into my eyes
microscopic dots on this ocean of sorrow we float on.
there have been days that the land was sea and the sea was land
where drowning made sense
and up was down.
there have been days when i wished for eternity
for nothing
and then
both.

my tears drag me to the sea
rising waves of sorrow
tides in my eyes
not a tsunami but an
inundation of loss
cry me an ocean