How can this be?
How can everything I've worked for be taken away from me?
How can everything I was fighting for fade so fast?
I'll never know what makes the time pass,
Maybe it's just that the hands on the clock keep moving,
No matter how much I'm loosing.
Sometimes i feel like gravity wants more than to pull me down,
But to pull me through,
And away from you,
Even kicking and screaming,
I'll never wake up when I'm dreaming,
Of my undoing,
Still I wonder, what keeps me moving?
Lying on this beach,
I realize that things so close, could be so out of reach,
And its ironic to think,
That just because my eyes blink,
Doesn't mean they've run dry,
Because it's years later,
And still I cry.
I just can't sustain,
What I thought I could, because things won't change,
They exist in the same
Light, they always have
And it hurts to laugh,
When you feel so broken inside,
It feels so necessary be in plain view but still hide.
Because even in a room so full,
I feel so empty,
Like a walking shell,
I've always known how to conceal myself well,
So by the time you think you're close,
I've done everything that I feel im supposed,
To do to protect what's left of my withering heart,
Because even when everyone's together I feel so apart.
And demons of this world have taken better souls than me,
Torn by the wreckage, and drowning in the seas,
We all have a journey, all have a path to follow,
And even when consumed by pain, I still feel hollow.
And this is sending me to my knees,
Hands together, begging please,
Give me something to live for,
Show me life is so much more,
Than it appears to me.
another older poem. a very difficult time in my life