Sometimes it’s so okay
It’s in the past
Others I remember sitting with you
Feeling not so alone

You came over last night
We laid together in the dark and it felt like you never left
This morning I made you coffee and you kissed me goodbye
I went to sleep again because I didn’t need to be up and when I woke up again it was like I changed timelines
You were there and we were together and then you were gone and I was alone
It was nice while it lasted
But it was like itching a mosquito bite and now I’m aware of it and I want to itch it again and
It’s annoying
More than anything it’s annoying
But loving you is so sweet and so beautiful and I’m not ready to let it go and I don’t know if I want to

I’ll be here building my foundation
So that I’m strong enough to carry myself and the ones that I love

Nothing is going to change the fact that you’ve stabbed me
But I’m taking away the knife.

You thought that I’d forgive you
When you slipped through the night like a black handkerchief in the wind
When you held your lips tight

But I didn’t

I felt something new
I felt community
And joy
And ease
I felt like I could speak like myself
That I could connect with sounds and movements beyond words
That I was funny
And I fit without needing to try

I looked at you and I saw the stars
I looked in your eyes and I felt a raw, oozing wound, ready to bleed if you asked me to

One hour car ride

His head on my shoulder
Sleeping peacefully beside his two best friends in the world
The people who love him the most

They’re talking about how they’re happy they know you
How happy that you guys could all make a family
How lucky we were to find each other and how excited we were for the future

His head on the pillow
In his best friends bed,
Safe,
Happy,

His girlfriend comes in crying
His best friend tried to look up her skirt
His best friend