I worry
About
You
Just
A little --
Just
A little
And enough
To know
Now
I am
Really
Starting
To care
About
You.

Pressing my fingernail
Against your skin
Running my hand
From there, back to your chin
I have not said a word, but
You grasp how my mind works.
You blink that way and I know
You are talking to me
Passing on a message
From the heart of a window.
We are having
A great conversation
Without even having
To exchange a single word.
Everything that must be said
Our feelings that ought to be shared
Here we are, doing so,
Just you and I, talking in silence
Without the sound of a word;
Between the fluster of the wind
And hearts that are about to discover.

It is the bridge
Between
Now and forever
The bridge of fear
And are we crossing over?
It is the bridge between
Possibility and doubt
Will we stay stuck
Or are we willing to try?
It is the bridge between
Who we are and
What we could be
Will the distance
Abide
Or will it be us
Eventually?
Are we ready
To venture
Cross this bridge
To our future?
Hold me tight
Let us take a chance
And bridge the gap
I am inclined
If you are
To cross the bridge
That leads to
You and I.

You say one thing
But mean another
I feign a nod
Because I know
What you aspire

You keep by the rules
I use all the right tools
We play it carefully
Though we already
Share this affinity

We do not have
To pretend
By now
We are on the same
Wavelength

We say one thing
But we mean another
Such a farce
Because we both know
We are untruthful

However
The beauty of
This deceit
Is that we are
Aware
Of the truth
Behind it

It is a lie
That we need not
Demystify
The truth about
You and I
Being coy is that
You are crazy
About me
And the other way
Around

We say one thing
But our eyes intend
Another

And the heavenly feeling

If
We are both liars;
The two of us
Telling the same fib
To one another
Then quite frankly,
At the core of the
Conversation
Were we not telling
The truth
All along?

Go on and open it
My diary
My book of
Poetry
If you will.
For you
Nothing is hidden
Exposed
And forthcoming
Every feeling
Is plain-spoken.
Either
You will read it
Right
If you do
Then
You will
Most likely
Recite
Each verse
As a fountain
Of goodness
Each one
Rhyming
With
A hunk of
Frankness.
My book is
Yours to read
For you and
You alone
To study,
To pore over
And be absorbed in;
You will
Interpret
Everything
Is as sincere
As it is;
I have not
Sprinkled anything
Nothing is
Beautified
Because
I have no
Details
To gild.
My book is
Yours to read
An open book
To you only.
This is
My diary,
My book of
Poetry
For you and
You alone
To see.

Propelled to
Another time

Sparked off

By a sound
The song
Played
In the background

Stirred up
Shadows
Digging up
Old photos

A whiff of perfume
Sends
My memories
In fume

Swallowing
Moments past
Each time
I taste that pie

Another pats me
The same way
Calling to mind
What you used to say;

Some things
Become off limits
Affluent in
Stories
Spots in the
Ordinary
Transformed
Into
A minefield

Memories have
A way to ****
The present day
Dragged downhill

Then at times
I wonder
Why things I love
Are marred

Not everywhere
You left a mark
It is I that
Allowed you
To linger
In my light

Connecting dots
When there are none
Connecting dots
That do not belong

I cease to be
Far-fetched
Some settings
Are not affixed

Here I am
Once again
In front of
The same same

But I beam

For the best
Way to get rid of
Memories
Is to create
New ones

That only I
Get to freeze.

I dreamt of broken glass
A paper thin cut
And a bleeding heart
It pains to endure
An imaginary wound
I stay sound asleep
But the torment is real

I sense a kiss
On my cheek
Am I dreaming
Or is this really happening
I cannot tell
The difference
Whether
My eyes are kept shut
Or I am here to wake up

I squeeze my soul
Then, I am sure
I am dreaming
Reality
And I am realizing
This exquisite dream

Everything is quiet
My heart is playing
Music

For once
I am synchronized
A rarity I highly prize
Your soft kiss
On my cheek
Suddenly a potential
Of gluing back
This broken piece.

In a world
That constantly
Changes
A snap of a finger
And it is
Winter all over again
When supposedly, spring
Has already come in
There are
These
Mood swings
Without warning
Often
Bad news
Depending
And once
What you thought
Was sure
All of a sudden
Alters
Allure.

But if you are
Lucky enough
To find
This passion
That lasts for life
A fixed appetite
When there is
No cloud
In the sky
A special device
That gets you
Through
The tough
Loyal at all times
The kind of love
That never declines;

For me
It is
Electronic music
My savior
If there is a need
My fervor
When there is no need

And lifelong
I will be
Dancing
To its beat.

You are
The constant
I can count on
No matter
The situation

From you
I will never part
Techno will always have
My heart.

Each time we hug
It is the moment
I unplug

At times
From life's
Harsh realities

Most times
Toasting to life's
Long-lasting
Delicacies.

I can still recall
The first time we met
Not yet recognizing
It was going to set

This journey
We have been sharing
Creating our own kind
First-class experiences
In the routine.

We dance and have coffee
Talk future and memories
Building
Brick by brick
The most precious

Skyscraper of friendship.

Each time we hug
We are honest at heart

Whether we are
Bursting out
With laughter
Or the hours we are
Caught in a sob.

My life is living it all with you

The hurt, the pain
The best, the great

There are not enough
Thank you's
To show my gratitude
But I hope you know

Each time we hug
It is me also exhibiting

I love you.

She does not live there anymore
Pass by as often as you want
She has already closed that door
To the past, to the past
She finally said goodbye.

It has been a while
Since she moved away
But it took her

An eternity and a day

To move on
From the past, from the past
She is no longer burdened.  

Everything became stale
Yet she soldiered on
Even then when hopes were frail
She fought past, She fought past
Til she smiled at last.


Whether it is
Irony or cliche
To come walking by

When her feelings no longer sway

It is a blast from
The past, the past
She no longer yens for.

Not everything
Has a reason
Not everything
Needs an
Explanation

Why mull over
Analyze over and over
When possibly
Things really do
Just happen
With conclusively
Nothing further

Not a wandering mind
Not a wondering heart
That has to examine
In pursuit of
Meaning.

Then take them
As they come
Empty words
With no substance

But
Listen carefully
I will say it only once
The truth in its entity

Things do not
Just happen
For us
For the idea
Of us
Is still bound
To the past
Whether
We want it
Or not

So if there is no essence
In our messages

Do not bother
Showing up
If there is not
The slightest hint
That there is
A comeback.

Do not tell me
It does not exist
Do not dare me
To cease

To dream

I have seen Paradise
From above
Now right before my eyes
I fall in love

A kind of blue
That is unreal
A moment so pure
Only happy hearts can feel

Leaving footprints
In the sand
I deem
We are one with the sun

Dear Paradise
That is ours
Dear Muriel and Remy
That made it ours

We leave
But not unchanged

Paradise Island

On your shores,
Our love for you
Forevermore remains.

She will wear
Jeans with holes
She will swear
If one annoys
She will flaunt
Her blow dried hair
Which she took
An hour
To prepare

She will fight
You with fists
She will not
Be intimidated
When there is
A feast
Her favorite film
is Scarface
She will shed
A tear
When a hero
Falls from grace

She will drink
The bottle of wine
She will work out
To keep her line
She loves looking
Like a a doll
She will beat
You at football
Her cute quirks
Will amaze
And her underwear
Is always lace

A woman
With a girl
attitude
A woman
Whom guys
Can call dude
She is not
either/or
She is
The girl next door
And one
They at times
Abhor

You will
Try to fit her
In a box
But why
Would you ever
Want
To tame a fox

I do not wish to reduplicate
From you and the past
I want to break
However, I reckon
Unconsciously
I am attracted
To the same facets
Persistently.

All I have been inclined to
The last couple of months
Is stop being reminded of you
But what seems to
Entice me
Bits and pieces of you
In another individual
I see.

How can I start anew
When deep in my heart
All I still desire is you
My heart
Set on ice and fire
Is history
Then why am I doing
A photocopy.

It is not deliberate
But what seduces me  
Are colors of a similar palette
How am I to let go
If still submerged in shadow
Though I know it is another person
Am I following
An identical pattern.

There comes a time
We should move past
Talking idly
About weather
Headlines and topics
Which are popular

Has it come to that point
We could let our guard down
Opening a window
Earning a glimpse at the soul
Discovering sides
That are more personal

That line disappears
Between the secured sphere
And everything that is deep

Now we scrutinize
What ticks you off
How you get to love
And we assure
Whether we get along
In the outside world

We are all acquaintances
Tested to be a confident
And true to form
Not all deserve
Sincere attachement

But unless we take
That step
That moment in time
Specific without end
From being a contact
To becoming a friend
That is all we will ever be
Weather, the trivial
And anything that is proper.

Take a closer look
At the picture I took

Everything is the same
But can it be
There is a latent possibility

That like I, that you descry
How one is shaped
Just like a heart.

Could always conceive
My heart was made of stone
When unexpectedly
In the midst of them all
I found one laying on its own

One is solitary
Concealed and ignored
When looking at the horde

But bring your magnifying glass
There is a precious little gem
Buried in the mass.

Could always certify
My heart was made of stone
One should drop or hit,
Ricochet off water
Yet each time
Unscathed once more

Why was it not softer
Long had I pondered
Arduous to carry
A hard heavy stone

But when I saw
This pretty one
Located on the floor
My heart is made of stone

Not otherwise
That is my wont.

Becoming scarce
But one day I know
One will take the same photo
And be glad
This heart of stone
In the midst of them all
Had no other form.

It is the moment
Right before
When two are yet
Uncomfortable
Everything else
Dissolves
As the two
Share
The limelight
How striking
Not even noticing
How their soul
All at once
Disrobed.

The air is so tense
Any second
It could break
Any second
One could shake
The air is thick
So thick
They almost
Cannot take it.

They exchange words
But their bodies
Shiver
They make love
With the eyes
Two lives capsized
Reaching the heights
Without even
A touch.

It is the moment
Right before
Two lovers
Set on fire
Attraction
Is never
Calculated
A mystery
Why two
Become
Magnets
The love that is
Inevitable
That is the love
... Desire.

Where I want to go
There are no shortcuts on the road
I cannot run a red light
At times, I am even forced
To take a few steps back.

Where I want to go
A dream place I already saw
The way is tedious and hard
The destination always seems so far.

Where I want to go
There are directions to follow
And though I might take longer
I am sure to make it on my own.

Where I want to go
There are no shortcuts
So many traps and holes
Yet each step and misstep
Still bring me closer to my goal.

Have you been
Waiting long

Forgive me
Still in the queue

Do no worry
Nothing is wrong

At long last
I go up the stairs

Where are you
In this temple of ours

It is so dark in here
But there your crescent eyes

Sitting on a sofa
I rush on top of you

Both stunned
At the gesture

Yet you carry on
Hug me as if we knew

You were determined
And I was sure

In unison, howling
I want you.

There was a time
I was able to separate
Had the skill in every state
In which
I could kiss and tell
Whether it was heartfelt.

There was a time
I could differentiate
Some were for fun
And others fate
Detached from emotion
Not all meant deep affection.

Then you came along
Neither for the thrill
Nor for the long haul
And it had been a while
Since I had that much
Fun and Confusion.

Doubted my head
Once I realized
That our kisses
Were heating up
With the unsaid
Was it fun or fate.

No longer could I separate
My heart had to migrate
Impossible to tell apart
Our kisses had to have a heart

And I was certain again

What a stellar feeling
To feel again, like a human being.

Maybe we have to argue
Let our ugly side ensue
To test whether or not
We are really that glued.

Maybe it is necessary
To check the natural nasty
If we are when petty things occur
A presage for stormier weather.

Maybe it is for our sake
Raise our voice in conflict
See if we are strong enough
When life is more than tough.

Because when times are good
Our friendship is much valued

We are as lovely
As we will ever be
An unbreakable link
And no ship to sink.

But it is when times are rough
That persuades if love is enough

We are divine
When times are fine
But our ability to sort things out
Will see if we will ever fall out.

Hold my hand
Show me the way
Through the crowd
And right to your cloud

A labyrinth of people
An army of obstacles
I cannot advance
Unless I follow your glance

Do not let me go
Nor break the flow
My heart is on my sleeve
That your fingertips perceive

One thing leads to another
And we will not tumble over
As long as we hang on to
The paradise that guides us two.

Berlin
Lets me be

Have it all
And agrees

Granting
All my quirks

All bits of me;

Berlin
Trains me

Inspirits my soul

To be loyal
Become faithful

To my
Nature.

The pace
Sets the tone
The hours
Are long

I am one
At extremes
And I am
Prime
in Berlin.

Every street
Has a story
Each corner
Its deep music

I leave my own trace
This unrivaled city
I embrace
Here, I belong, Berlin
Morning till dawn.

Sometimes it is what we anticipate
The memories we already create
It is so brilliant before it happens
Certain of a tragedy in the end.

Sometimes it is emotions that saunter
The imaginative mind that wanders
Nurturing different expectations
Feeding the soul with specific visions.

Maybe it is the moments that precede
The dreams and the hopes that are still unclear
That will determine the growth of the seed

Maybe it is the joyous thought or pain
That will make a situation that way
Because are we ever shocked if it rains?

This is what it comes down to
Bubble-wrapped memories,
The last couple of years
Hoarded in bags and boxes too.


As they take away the last one
I stare at the now empty rooms,
Fragments of my life I vacuum
And the knot in my heart tightens.


Moments flash before my eyes
Day after day, home is smiles and sighs,
People and dinners I welcomed
Even bad times, and there were some.


This is it, this is goodbye
The next chapter of life to untie,
A little pinch as I am about to let go
But it is time to open other windows.


I remove my name from the mailbox
Fully aware that it is the final task,
I close the door to the past
Getting new keys for new locks.

Sitting opposite me
Scarce meters away
But what an army
Standing in the way

The tram curves
The mirror of a smirk
A flustered one I observe
And gone are all my irks

Here where all descend
I will be the next
We have just one instant
To find a pretext

I make my way home
Why nothing else, I exhale
Suddenly I turn to stone
As I hear you blurt out *hey

You have been so schizophrenic
Your mood more than erratic
One moment, I am burning under the sun
The next, contemplating why I am frozen
Even in one day
You go a thousand ways
Can you not just sit tight
No matter what you decide
Plan to stick around
Not continuously on a rebound
How wearisome to keep up with
A mind that changes every minute
Oblivious on what to expect
Terrified to end with regrets
When all I am asking
Is if I need better preparing
Because it is alright if there is a storm
But pretty please, I must have you perform.

And all of a sudden
I am twenty-two again
Transported to a time
When I had no idea
What I was doing
Incessantly figuring out
Where my life was going.
In that state of in-between
It was only in the time being
Prompt to recreate
Get myself to think straight
And once I was ready
I would leave this phase
Desist from meandering
Find a way back to the race.
Never would I have imagined
Just like that
A mundane monday night
The second I caught you
You glancing at me
I knew on the spot
That nothing will ever be
The same again for me.
Complex enough as it were
You had to mess with my scheme
Had to worm your way into
My heart, thinking for two.
Long I had thought
How jarring it was
The worst timing of all
A year to take care of myself
And I did not comprehend
How any of this could help.
But that special spot you held
Now looking back
In hindsight
Glad I took the chance
You were probably the best thing
That could ever happen
You loved me at my worst
Already then saw in me
What I always wanted to be.
Fast-forward to the present
Five years later
Five years of rigor
Meanwhile
Creating the me
The one you were certain
I was one day going to be
Now on other sides
Living parallel lives
Just like that, life happens
Another one is your wife.
But there are occasions
The present is put on pause
Just like that
The past is back on track
Neither bitter nor morose
Just a star in the cosmos.
In love there is no timing
It is a plan of no free will
A moment never-ending
We shared nothing but the truth
We came to love each other
Like we were destined
To shortly change one another.
Today I am just relieved
To know that I also meant
Something to you
That at one point in time
I was also everything to you.
It is only after
Once the story is over
That you figure out
All absolute things
Anything in life at all
Has its reasons
Because it takes only a second
Just like that, that life happens
And the gratitude
That it even happened at all.

Today I walked past the house
The one of my dreams
The one that could have been ours.
It was always my first choice
But fate decided otherwise
Just another dream I had to toss.

Now other people are living there
Here goggling from across the street
I caught sight of their love and chairs.
They have made it their own
Coming back to it each night
The beautiful house they now call home.

I came to realize that I mourned
How hard it is to let go
Of something that was never yours.
Although in my heart of hearts
I once wished to call you mine
All I am always left with is hurt.

Today I walked past the house
The only one I dream of
The one that could have been ours.
In another lifetime perhaps
What belongs to me shall find me
And destiny will not set any traps.