and i've showered four times today
    already
and i wish i knew why
i cannot scrub off shame
and disgust
and all other filth
like i would if it were dirt.

*n.d.

may 23rd
you gave me a necklace
with a heart locket
and it had my name

and on may 24th
the clasp broke
and i lost the locket
and the picture of us i put inside

may 25th
i went looking
for the heart
that said my name

may 26th
i found the chain
and the broken clasp
that made the locket lost

may 27th
i said i was sorry
and you said
"it's fine"

may 28th
i didn't believe you
when you said
"it's fine"

and today, on may 29th
i found the heart that said my name
it was in your chest all along

*n.d.

you deserve to be
the last thought before i fall
asleep at night, and

you deserve to be
the last person i ever
hurt, and you deserve

to be the last page
in my notebook because you
inspired my words

*n.d.

"i think i love her"
he thought
"but she could never love me"
but she did
and she thought
"i wish he loved me"
"the way i love him"
but he did
but all they ever did
was have thoughts
*n.d.

you're weaving a web
spider silk
that's tangling me up
a victim
made of lies and deceit
and i cannot get out
i'm stuck in it
a victim
and no other dumb ladybugs
want to get caught up
so i stay here alone
a victim
*n.d.

you're perfect
and you'd be perfect
even if your hair was short
    or long
and your eyes were brown
   or blue
and your lips were big
   or small
and you're feeling down
   and need someone
i just want you to know
   you're perfect.
*n.d.