I write this poem and try to forget it,
Even though I enjoy this more than I would like to admit.
The Sun and Moon have faded and gone cold,
As I vanish with them into the darkness, my story will go untold.

I am not okay even on the best of days,
My negative thoughts are somehow set ablaze.
How can I admit I am broken without feeling needy?
I feel like I am lost in the middle of the Dead Sea.

Every single day I put up this masquerade,
As if me being happy is some kind of grade.
My scars are tales that scream to be told,
I have to look them in the face and tell them no as if I am bold.

I have difficulty deciphering the way I am supposed to feel,
But it doesn't matter anyways because my emotions are mine to ****.
My thoughts are not the eye in the hurricane,
They are the crashing waves in the storm with masses of rain.

I felt alone,
The darkness of the night has always been my home.
I always glance up and see the clouds looming,
With great sorrow, I look down and see the flowers are not blooming.

How does one explain loneliness when they have loads of friends and family?
You are floating about with nothing but your own solitude in your vast galaxy?
All of my ribs cracked when I fell into my own personal madness,
When I fell into rock bottom, my blood painted the canvas.

Now, our love is nonexistent,
Even though I know that was not your intent,
It was all there in the last text you sent,
And it all left me completely and utterly bent.

I see you nearly every day,
I never seem to know what to say,
I do not want the last thread of us to decay,
But I guess there is a cost to friendship and I have to pay.

You gave up when I was at my worst,
All of a sudden it felt like I was cursed,
Tears welled up in my eyes ready to burst,
But they never fell, which is not a first.

You are the last thing that should worry my mind,
But when I try to think about the important things, my thoughts come to a bind,
Happiness after all this is hard to find,
It is like walking through a battlefield, and I am blind.