Hidden smiles,

Hidden lies,

How do we find the answers?

When there is no one to believe


How do we make a choice?

When we are trying to break free

People hide behind a mask

Trying to hide their tears,

But at the end all they are doing is trying to hide their fears.

They don’t want people to see,

See who they truly are.

So they think the lies will cover up who they once were.

But sooner or later they will realize

They are only fooling and deceiving themselves.

The lies that you claim to hold will only bring you so far;

Then you will fall,

In the lies you tell this world.

So open your eyes and look around.

Then maybe one day you will see.

A better life, than the lies from beneath

A crawl became a walk.
A walk turned into a run.
A simple smile became a laugh;
A laugh eventually turned into words.
You were no longer the baby that I once held in my arms.
But a growing child.
Every step of the way I was there by your side,
  Watching you blossom.
  Every footprint we made marked another memory.
   Another memory that nothing could replace,
  Even till this day I watch you grow,
But you will never be too big for me to hold.
A silent tear falls from my eye as I watch you be free;
Making footprints of memories

The silence between us leaves me so helpless.

As I lay in a casket and reminisce of every memory,

The past, the present and the future all intertwine;


For when I close my eyes I fall back trying to stop the time.

I cry out for attention, to get this pain of my chest.

The feeling of rejection, I get lost in my head.

My heart beat deceases slowly as I start to breathe less.

My weakness takes control, put this to an end.

I try to gain redemption.

Something to bring me peace,

But I fall in this hole. I fall too deep.

The rain pours overhead; nothing to block this storm.

Day by day it remains dormant; sleepless and hidden away.

Bring abroad a new generation, a new kind of change.

Change that heals the pain, sows every wound

Change that make the blind see again.

Put a halt to this storm.

Mend all that is destroyed.

For when the storm finally passes over, only silence is left to hear.

The more and more I think about it, the more I get drifted away.

Another journey to take, til I find what I desire.

But apart of me feels like the road I'm on is one step closer away from the fire.

On the road-way to Heaven to a different destination.


A calmness of Serenity that I thought I found a little while back, but I only stayed for a short time.

Then I lingered in the bewilder, til I slowly found my way back.

My scar slowly healed; a little left that bleeds.

Because I watched you drift away from me.

Slowly things fell apart, after all who would of thought

That you would of drifted away from me.

At first I asked you to come back, to mend all that we lacked

Til I realized there was no turning back

All we have left are fading memories from the past

As I watched you drift away from me, you drifted away from me

Now its time for you to watch me fly

As I drift through the sky, I will say goodbye

Because now you watch me drift away from you

The waves collide against the ocean shore and covers up the footprints that lay before. As it breaks into sonority then to calmness; harmony is created. As we watch the dolphins swim, we grasp only peace and serenity. We feel the breeze in the wind and our feet cresting the sand. The dolphins echo in the far distance; yet it seems like they are within our reach. Their skin glistens from the beating of the sun. The ocean departs, but beauty is still found between the cracks of life and death. The church bell rings and wakes the mourners from their sleep. Everyone is preparing for the awake. Sorrow and sadness is within our hearts. Our flesh was ripped and torn apart; parasites were eaten away at our stomachs. We covered up the tears we had shed; as we walked in the funeral parlor and saw our friend dead.  


            The meaning of death is the ending of some one's life; it is a departure from this world onto the next. Death brings upon alterations for friends and family because we are force to say good-bye to an individual that was once part of our lives. The feeling of loneliness strikes through our hearts because a missing piece is gone. The ironic aspect about death is even though it brings sorrow, it awakens a fear in the depth of our souls. It is a sudden realization that death can happen at any moment. Rather we expect it or it raid with no warnings. The perspective of life alters, we stop taking so much for granted. The uncanny feeling we receive when we stand in front of a coffin; a dead corpse lays in it. Eventually their skin will decay and deteriorate; their bones will become brittle. Then only a skeleton will remain in the bed that once laid someone that was a part of this Earth. Now a tomb stone marks what is left of their body. With a quote that is engraved on their stone that represented them; a remembrance.

            The day approached and my heart and soul were in my throat; I felt as if I was paralyzed. I cried so hard that every time I spoke my voice would tremble. I was torn apart. My insides burned into flames; my organs were at a crisp turning into ashes. My head was pounding; confusion and disturbance ran through my mind. I could not embrace any clear thoughts. It felt like a thousand voices were contemplating in my head. My nerves showed through the shaking of my hands.  My entire body ached of pain; nails were piercing through every inch of my skin. I did not want to believe that she was dead. A part of me wished it was just a dream; I wasn’t ready to face reality. My thoughts gyrated around delusions. The last memory of Laura that I contemplated at her funeral was when I saw her, a week before she passed away. I glanced over at my perplex father; as he leaned forward for the entire ceremony with his head down. It was the first time that I saw my father cry and when I did, I felt the burning of souls trapped in Hell. His eyes were cloudy from the tears. His face became languish; as his hands shook from the nerves arousing. That day he lost his girlfriend, his best friend. Half of his heart was stolen and crumbled; a gap was formed and now remains empty. I could not read his mind, but I did not have to because his pain penetrated through everyone's body and emotions. His body was still, frozen like an ice burg; not even the sun could melt away my father's sorrow.

            It was time to say our good-byes. My father and I slumped down the aisle dragging stones behind us. We approached Laura's coffin and for a split moment he just gazed over her dead corpse. She laid in her peaceful bed, but she wasn’t awake--she was dead. Then my father took off his hat and pressed it against his chest. He leaned in to kiss Laura on her artic cheek. Just like Romeo kissing Juliet; my father said his farewell. Overhead rolled in a thunder storm and the pressure of rain began to pour down everyone's face. In an instant my father's love for Laura broke the glass of every window and stopped all movement in the funeral parlor. From that moment on I viewed my father differently. I knew right there that my father would never love another women as much as he loved Laura.

            When we left the funeral my father's and I relationship changed forever. Laura was the link that connected us; now there is a fissure that separates us. After facing death I finally understood the meaning of it. It is not a gathering for mourners to say good-bye to a love one, but rather a time to come together to celebrate a remembrance of a life. For even dolphins need time to rest forever at the bottom of the ocean. Laura's biggest dream was to swim with one; now she can forever rest in peace with them. Now I walk this Earth with Laura underneath my feet, with a gravestone reading “Remember me not as I am now, but as I use to be”.  

            In conclusion, life is a precious gift that is not meant to be taken for granted. Through Laura's death I realized the value of life and how it is too short to accumulate regrets, hatred and the past. I also embrace the life lesson that her death taught me; every day is another chance to grow, change, forgive, and to make a difference. My friend Laura will always impact my life forever. Death is a rude awakening to a human's eye; a realization that puts fear in our lives. Through Laura's death I discovered that in reality it is a natural beauty, not necessarily a final good-bye. I learned that a life truly never ends at death because the memories are what keep them alive. Just like the common prayer says, “Fill not your heart with pain and sorrow, but remember me in every tomorrow”. As I go on living my life I try to live it to the fullest. Laura's death awoken an acknowledgement that life is a gift, not a privilege and at any moment it can be abstracted from us.

Dear Jeffrey Kyle Wolfe,


When a heart grows fund of another, when they depart the distance between them seems to go on forever. Just like a child, who yearns for its mother; always seeking guidance and warm arms for security, the simple love that lingers unconditionally. Embracement and hope is what I've searched for, for so long. You caught my eye from the start, somehow knowing that deep within you bestow all that I desired. Our first kiss withheld a spark.  Love is now just an arm reach away, a soft touch to the skin, close to the heart. Love is now that compassionate kiss, hard to resist, an affectionate companionship. In barrel time changes, yet we stop at nothing. We still search together to find that rhythm that beats to the drum. That sensation that drives us crazy; it even makes our body feel so numb, when both of our hearts beat as one. The feeling we receive when we connect lips; the mystery we find behind every kiss. The touch of my soft skin as we cover every base, not wanting to miss the simplistic basics. You don’t have to search much further because I am in your sight babe. I promise not to hurt you; you have my trust I won’t deceive. Break your fall then just leave. When I speak the words forever, I mean eternity. You are my perfect harmony. Will you lose control with me and play all night? Making our greatest fantasies come alive. We create erosion as we mark our territory; explosion of deep compassion, as we send out different vibes. I gaze in your eyes. They change icy blue on colder days, and then back to a bluish grey. I wrap my hand around your neck and I pull you closer to my chest. Your eyes start to role in the back of your head. Just forget about everything that was once said. Allow your mind to draw blank. No more thinking, only discovering. Let’s stop all clocks and time. I long for every touch, every moment spent in your arms. I want to freeze every sound that surrounds. Accept your heart that steadily lies against mine. The drum finally beats as one. You are everything that I want to embrace, cling to for eternity because you are my perfect harmony.

    The love I have for you is indescribable, at times hard to grasp a hold of. The force pulls me in captivating my heart and soul. My world spins, rotating as we play and switch our different roles. My breath is oblivious; as you whisper in my ear “I will never let you go.” Then we lie in a pile of roses and watch the petals fly high as we land. I fall in your arms, my security and my everything.  My heart starts to pound even harder, with each glide of your hand up and down my side. Unbreakable companionship as we ponder through each wall. Circulation of our blood flow finally correlates as one. The blood rushes in the same direction, even when the moon is not full. You fit the missing piece. You are the other side that makes me whole. This emotion lingers with sensation, a high quality of depth. It is intriguing with each step. My love for you is unconditional. Every promise I will keep and more memories I will fulfill. A vow I will retain. “I will love you till death do us part, in sickness and in health, for better or for worse.”  I will give you my heart, my soul my love and through each storm we will stand, united as one. I could not ask for better, for you give me much more than anyone ever could. And when the distance separates us that is when I feel your love even more.



I love you Jeff, forever and for always.



Love always,

Nash Wolfe

"Take a look in the mirror, what do you see? All that is staring back is your reflection. A reflection of what, of who you are, or whom you use to be? Only one person can change your life and only one person can make you who you are. That person is yourself."



"Every mistake, every lie will catch up to you. So be prepared to face it at the end. Don't try to run away from your past because it will follow you. You can't cover up the trail of your mistakes and expect all of your problems to go away. It only takes one time for the wind to blow on it and reveal it once more."




Every breath of air we take in,  is another secret we hold deep within

Every sacrifice that we make, is just another chance to see the change

Fewer days that are left, which leaves us with nothing but more of our regrets

Face to face with our lies, still trying to deny

Starting to believe what was created in our minds, now we desire to know the truth

Setting off on a journey to our past, hoping to find something new

All of our lives we decided to hide underneath these lies

Then one day a past event reminded us what we use to be like

Finding hope and strength, trying to reveal what we had erase

Now we spend everyday, rectifying our mistakes

How far does one go? Just to figure out what they didn't know

Was it worth the change? Was it worth the lies?

That I guess, I'll let you decide