Earnestly I tried to support you
Since you were my best friend.
Perhaps I didn't know what a
Friend should be?

Inseparable alone.
Seditious with others.
Accentuating every found fault.
Creating narratives that
Umbilically attached to my
Neuroticism. That's what you said about me.

That's what I said about you.
A loud pig playing Robin Hood.

As I look across the flowing waves
And curls of your locks, and breathe in
Deep the fresh smell of sea salt and
Laughter by the rocks, I remember

That was then.
This is now.

Then, we registered our love.
Since, we've certified its end.
Bookended by pieces of paper,
The meaning given to them ever
Changing. Looking back

Across the waves.
Sand in my shoes.
Crying with joy.
Ignoring the pain.

Not now.

Tears crashed like future echoes.
Smiles crooked now in photos -
Shots staged to reflect reality
Highlighting their unreality.

As I look across the crashing waves
And snarls of your locks, and breathe in
Deep, was the salt in the air on my cheeks
And the laughter aimed at me?

Driven by spite I sit before a screen -
A harsh white glow illuminates my face.
Do I know how to conjure up a scene?
Or can twelve years pressured silence erase

The words fallen through fingers without pen?
Now caught by keyboard as I am now told
I am too old to hold my dreams. But then
I see your smile and know your future's gold.

If I'm to gift the power to achieve
Nostalgia can't excuse my self-belief.

You've snuffed flickering
Flames of injustice yet their
Hate dims your lantern.

As the light fades, I cannot
See the ablution of souls.

Am I the catch or am I now the bait?
   I ask as you unhook me from your line
   And throw me into passioned arms that wait
   For loving eyes to move from your benign
   Beauty. You let your predatory whine
   Escape your lips as you bring mine to yours
   And stop. And tease. And take the lovers’ sign
   And stake it in my heart with smiling force.
You take his hand in yours. I drown slowly in air.

The sun shone on the school field
As it all lay out before me –
A bright prospect written on a golden apple –
And yet this is the reality.

..a bit **** really…

I was sold a lie spun by a weaver,
I did not catch his name,
Who took my firstborn dream
For a minimum-wage timeshare.

I’m angered by my idiocy.
Who am I, a Prince of the Estate,
To believe in happy ever afters
And the meritocratic lie?

Troy’s walls are lain siege
By the slings and arrows
Of others’ fortune until
We retreat to our place.

Dreams are merely adverts.
Richness becomes richer
As we forever chase rainbows
In the hope of a *** of gold

Only to find cigarettes of the soul –
False illusions. False illusions
Shattered into mirrored shards
Reflecting a broken man.

I am Prometheus – I stole the flame
Of Pandora and set it free
Only for doves to peck at my liver
And **** on my heart.

I remember, don’t worry
As your words softly drift over me
Like a body in the snow.
How could I ever forget?
You hold him as my arms outstretch
My reach and I fall.
Don’t worry, I know
You can never loosen his grip for me
Or your grip on me
Around my heart.
Don’t worry, I know
I can never shout from the rooftop
As your hand strokes my face
And surrounds my throat.