What if the clouds above us
Lit ablaze
As they covered the stars tonight?
What if they fell
To baptize us in flame
As we lay beside each other
Waiting for something to happen?
What if the earth swallowed us whole
And we never saw another soul?
What if something supernatural, something strange
Really happened in this moment
Like we so desperately hope?

What if you and I had never met?
What if the separate roads we took in life
Were not yet built
Or turned another way?
What if all the things we wished had never happened
Were bottled up and thrown into the sea?
What if you don't wake tomorrow—
Where would I be?
And if we were a continent apart—
As we will be soon—
How would I cope?
What if I went my way
And you went yours—
And what if our ways won't ever intersect?
What if we reunite someday
But we don't really know each other?

I believe
That if we truly dwell in possibility
We won't enjoy the time we have.
So let’s just lie right here and stare at the nighttime clouds
And let's be glad that nothing truly happened.

Lying rigid in the frozen dewy grass, breathing fog into the air
If only I could see beyond the clouds, I'd look into the starscape
And trace the constellations with my eyes
Searching for the one we called our own
Remembering the way we lay beside each other one sacred summer night
Straining our eyes, staring longingly at meteors and satellites.
Tonight, those stars so hidden from my view are the same presiding over you
And that used to comfort me, knowing that you're not unreachable.
But tonight, I see through starry eyes
looking down at us with their celestial vision
To witness a bright and happy girl whose smile steals the world
And a broken, lonely man who used to call her "love."

Lying lonely in a hotel room in Charlotte
I'm listening to James Taylor like you said you'd never do
And if I could I'd curse you, calling you a heartbreak or a harlot
But as we both know, simply not a word of it is true. 

I start to wonder what you're doing at this very instant
Back in California, Golden State of emergency. 
Are you smiling at an endless sunset
As you dream of happy endings that I'll never even see?

You press your lips against another's and still I never cross your mind. 
I drag my disembodied heart along rock bottom's floor
As you experience your highest highs, sitting blissfully at his side
And wistfully I'm singing, "Hard times, come again no more..."

Each infrequent word you say to me
Causes me to long for you.

Every time that you ignore me
Makes me wish you missed me too.

2:00 am
This is the sort of silence that makes a man insane.
2:01
I find myself writing once again, coping as I can.
A lovesick heart still writhing in the throes of loss
And spewing empty words, lacking any meaning.  
2:03
And I'm still unoriginal;
Never have I said a thing not said before.
2:10
And I wonder why it's taking me so long to get over you
And why your visage fills my vision every time I shut my weary eyes.
2:12
And I ought to take back every word I’ve said
Because I didn’t mean them, or at least I shouldn’t have.
2:25
I'm beginning to believe you'll never be the one for me.
2:26
And I realize you came to that conclusion long ago.
2:40
And I find it funny that somehow, even now
You keep me from my sleep and haunt my every dream.
2:45
I'm feeling rather sick
Of sitting on the sadder side of somberness.
2:58
It's nights like this that make me wonder if I'll ever be complete again.

Because I need
something
to scream back at my soul.

“Have hope; there’s someone out there for you. You just haven’t met her yet.”
Allow me to object. I met her years ago
And somewhere in the meantime she showed me what it means to love
And even to this day I feel her name engraved upon my heart.

When I stared into her ocean eyes
And I moved my lips to form “I love you,”
I felt it in my soul: the reason I was born
The purpose of my being, the thing that God intended.

But see, He didn’t make us into perfect-fitting puzzle pieces
(Despite all the idealists and Such Great Heights)
But I believe He destined me to fall in love with her
And He made her to fall in love with someone else.

So now I lie alone, to ponder inequality
And contemplate the ways I'll never be complete.