Daniel Samuelson

Daniel Samuelson Jan 2014

Are you still worth my every waking moment?
You used to be my saving grace, my salvation, my atonement.

Now it seems like every ounce of love you had for me has been replaced with hate,
And so I wonder: is every wishful dream of you a waste?

I swear that love (and lack thereof) need not define me
Because I find my heart and lovesick mind confining...

God, remind me of the days I wrote for reasons other than emotion
For something like the clouds, an iron fence, or even for the ocean.

I used to say I’d never write a love poem, not for you or anyone.
But now I’ve nothing left to focus on, seeing how my heart has come undone.

For once upon a time, love was something beautiful and blurred
Not intended to be reckoned with or outlined by my simple human words.

Working on getting out of this love-centered poetry rut. I ought to write on things more meaningful.

Daniel Samuelson Jan 2014

The Wind

In the absence of you, what have I left to pursue?
Everything I know is nothing but an unattainable end:
The hunt for perfection in what is flawed,
The search for beauty among the mundane,
The crusade for sanctity and sacredness in all that is profane.
Hence, everything I seek is only madness, and all I say is meaningless.
Simple musings of a man whose mind succumbed to a broken heart
Driven to insanity when he lost the only thing he loved.

Daniel Samuelson Jan 2014

Dreams

Every time I catch a glimpse of you
My heart just comes unglued
And all I hear is an echoing
“You'll never be enough for me.”

I’ve heard your flirty stories
Of empty kisses and their glories
And it makes me wish I had the same,
That I could love another and feel no shame.

I’m happy that you’ve found felicity
In the hearts of many boys, consistently.
And me? I feel I’ll be alone for quite a while
And I’ll not be causing any blushful smiles.

But... c’est la vie, you see.

As you always play it coy
As you jump from boy to boy
Do you search for glimpses of me
As I look for you in everyone I see?

Love, I hope your dreams are coming true.
And mine as well? Oh, mine are too.
Every nightmare that’s ever crossed my mind
Has reared its ****** head and come to life.

Daniel Samuelson Dec 2013

Clichés of the Heart, Pt. I

"If you truly love something, you must let it go."
I watch the dove fly from my open hands,
A flurry of wings, fear, and confusion.
It spirals above, and for a moment
It seems the world is too much
And it longs to be contained.
But it ceases its sad circle
Without glancing back.
It heralds its freedom
And wings away
To my dismay
As my tears
Begin to
Fall.

I wish it didn't hurt my heart to watch you spread your wings.

Daniel Samuelson Nov 2013

The Yearning

Sometimes I wonder if you ever think of me and, if so,
How you manage to brush me from your thoughts
And dream of someone else (I know I never could).
Vagrant minds procure no solace but in love, and
Only in its fair requital. Alas...
Nothing’s ever meant so much to me.
No one’s ever occupied my mind for
Every passing moment of my empty days.

Daniel Samuelson Nov 2013

Cadence

The final moments that I held you close against my chest
I felt my heart skip beats to match your cadence
And I knew that if you pulled away from me
My empty heart would cease to beat
For absence of a reason.

But you still said goodbye, and you left me pulseless.

Daniel Samuelson Nov 2013

Reflections, Pt. II

I’ve learned that happiness
cannot be found in the form of comforting words.
I’ve learned that the third time you told me you were sure
hurt me just as badly as the other two.
But I had to make certain.
I’ve learned that a part of me died that night
when you told me you wanted something else
and I held your hand one final time.
I’ve learned that love (at times) is hellish
and that Molotov cocktail of rejection and forsakenness
that came bursting from my heart
left a bloodstain on the love letter I would have given you.
I’ve learned that pain gives way to numbness
When the nerves inside your soul are severed.
I’ve learned that I miss you most in the mornings
when I awake to find you only love me in my dreams.
I’ve learned that I’m not worth the wait, the distance, or the pain.
I’ve learned that I’ll never truly get you off my mind.
Most importantly I’ve learned that happiness is often only real while unconscious.

A response of sorts to "Reflections (What I've Learned in College)" by Gambit. Thank you for the inspiration.