Others
they know there the path
they know the norm
that I don't know
they got the memo
that I didn't
they learned there role
that if forgot
they got a script made and written by society
that I did not get
they got the message and they understand
////
me
i know that feeling
of not knowing
of missing the memo
i hope i get
i do
one day
perchance
but
i like being curious
like being out there
but
i guess
that it will be good for me
that
i learned the norm
the memo
the script made and written by society
that
i missed
that what differs
from
me and them.

I'm tired
of doomscrolling
of seeing my life past my life go by
go by
by a screen
I'm tired that everything we do
has to be package in my screen
I have the urge to try to go way
from earth
and its evil roots
I hate that blogs and TV are reposting bad news
there spreading and
Spreading bad news like the plague
Because that what pays the bills
evil stuff
bad stuff
I'm tired of this
I'm tired of all of this
I'm tired
tried
tried

once i had a friend
i made a friend
he was my best friend
the best friend
forver
i love him
i loved him
he loved me
he loves me
he was with me forever
for 5
6
7
8
9
whatever
but then
I grew ***** in my face
I grew fatter
I grew skinner
I got bored
I grew taller
my friend went away
I made him away
we split
and we grew farther
I was
10
12
15
19
I was 30
and my friend we never
spoke
but
I still know him
as my best friend
Forever.

Turns out they were right
all the glitter
is not always gold
that some truths are better not told
that bad things
are more complex
then we think
that truth are more complex
that not everything is black and gray
that truth can be twisted
I give up
nothing I can do
the truth is twisted
and hate to tell you
that the truth

The smell of perfume hit me in the nose
its was an ice cream flavor
with a hint of vanilla
and powerful stench of
nostalgia
the scent was big and infected the room
I look at the bottle
it reminds me of her
It's like calling me
the bottle
that does not move
it calls me like a mermaid call
it draws me in
to my doom
the remembering is too painful to baer
I go back
with water in my eyes
I miss that smells
I need that smell
but it has gone
forever
that perfume
of ice cream flavor
with a hint of vanilla
with a huge hint of nostalgia

i wish i can go back to the good times
goo back to the prime time
when
public figures were not so dumb
when the worlds' health dint feel numb
i want to go back
when tech dint take care of us
Instead of our moms and dad
or whomever
I wish we all can go back in time
when society was not crumbing in our feet
when every thing dint came to disagreement
Where every answer was wrong
and every is wrong
when we didn't isolate
until the point of auto killing.
i wish can go back in time
to prime time.

Talking

As I do my work I look up to the class to escape for second

At frist hearing I hear

My teacher teaching

At the second hearing I hear myself breathing

Then I hear them

The classmates

My classmates

Not. My friends

Just people that I share a room with while getting lectured 7 hours of the day

There talking about plans of there day

Movies

Work

Homework test

Me

I know there not talking about me

It can not be

I did nothing to them

Except share a class

I don’t even know the

But nevertheless

They stare at me

While they talk and gossip

And I’m forced with the will of destiny

To

Unfortunately

stare back

As they talk.

We won’t born to be broken
We won’t born to be broken
And we are not born broke
We get broken
But that's life
We are born alone not die alone but to find the right person in the future
In the long run we find each other, brother
It just takes us more for some.
And just because we got stuck in hole in the rode
Is not that the rode is over
The rode nearly began
We are not born broken
We are not meant to be broke
We are not toys that broke and can’t be used again
We are indestructible
We are one of a kind
We are special
Because we Were born special
We are not  born broken
we are born gifted
We Were  born alone
We just meant to find each other
We are not broken
And we are meant to stay like this
We are gifted.
Your gifted.

Dear.. me
Hi!
You're probably wondering how or what are you in the future
Don’t worry,brother I don’t know
But we never know
You can never truly know until you know
I still don’t know
But I think you and me will know when we know
Maybe writing words in pages and digital pages will bring you joy
Maybe
Maybe not
Maybe we are sculptors, big fancy ones on tv and in the screens. The ones you said you can ever
Or maybe we are artist
But that’s is an umbrella term
Dear me
Don’t get discouraged
Or get split between words
We don’t know what makes us truly happy
Or that thing that will pay the bills
Or how we are paying it with
It ok not know
We are open to anything at the moment
Anything that brings us joy
We still don’t know what will be the definitive thing.
But that ok
We both will know
When we know
Let’s pray we actually know at the end.

Reflection
Who is this person I stare at ?
How is he?
I looked at him and only see his flaws
IS tendency I must admit
Too fat
Too skinny
Too shy
We, I
Constantly tend to nitpick everything he does
Every word he says
Every question he has
Every friends he has
I hate that I do that
Do I hate him?
I have a mental exercise I do
I look at the other side of the coin
I see what is wrong
But I can see the bigger picture
He’s not perfect
That for sure
But
I look at him and
See
How sympathetic he is
How caring he is
That he doesn’t care for the way he look but still takes care of his body
He eats
He sleeps
And every day I try to count my blessings
Instead of seeing flaws
What is this reflection I see
In the wall
Is he the prettiest of them all?
No.
No he is not
But every day he tries to be a better
A better
reflection.

beauty
Blonde are beauty
White skin like snow is beauty
blue eyes the shade of blue is beauty
Sugar white teeth are Beauty
but
apparently
so happens
that
Black Afro hair ain’t
so happens that
black, brown and soft brown ain’t because it’s 3 shades to dark
because
so happens that
brown skin like chocolate ain’t it
hair like black snow ain’t it
eyes like the milky way galaxy ain’t.
ain’t beauty
Society has one mold and if you happen not to fit then you ain’t worthy
that the skin, hair, eyes that you are bound with are not beauty,
says who.
open your
Eyes
and escape the mob mentality that have us
in chains.
This is not making progress.
because
black hair is beauty
black skin is beauty
black eyes are beauty .