I had a father once
one who committed one too many sins
so I don’t know why it surprised me so
when there was finally one I could not forgive

was this not his legacy all along?
irresponsibility and negligence and abuse
and never knowing right from wrong

I am a victim of my fathers demons
my mother even more so
his fists and his ire and his indifference
pummeled us and refused to let us grow

why was I so surprised
after a life time of deviancy and ire
that my father would be the same creature he is
bathing everyone else in his fire

The feast began when I was eight
I remember the mildewed room
I could hear my mother down the hall
With the poisons she consumed
Laughing, oblivious

I remember the nails that grazed down my back
As i tried to concentrate on her soothing laugh
I remember trying to leave afterward
To the door, still open a crack

I didn’t dare acknowledge it
The beast cowered beneath my blanket
And hid itself from view
It’s claws that night were bloodied with my youth

The meal continued at the age of 11
Shopping at a nearby strip mall
The beasts eyes followed me through the aisles,
Hunting me, when I was still so small

Once I was cornered, it spoke to me
Loud and roaring
I recoiled back
I didn’t dare acknowledge it, I ran
and it laughed with the rest of its pack

The gourmet carried on at the age of 15
When a too familiar hand caressed my sisters leg
The only sounds that night were her screams, and then my fury
And then my beg
We had to acknowledge the beast then

The feast persisted well past maturity
And now i age day by day
I still feel their eyes
But their claws seek younger prey