i wish the stars would stop whispering in my ears
all the things
i wanted you to know

i wish the wind would stop bringing the memories
bittersweet moments
and with them the smell of your perfume

i wish the moon would stop telling me
she saw the way i looked at you that night
when your fingers were in my mouth
and chills were running down my spine

i wish the sidewalks would stop reminding me
of the places we have been

i wish the cold would stop making me miss you
your warm breath when you kissed my neck
and the heat of your fingers when they ran through my hair

maybe i'm a coward for not saying i love you
but for now

i'll let the stars
the wind
the moon
the sidewalks
the cold haunt me
and secretly wish
they'll bring you back

my lips remember things
yours wanted to forget
and it's hard to fall asleep at night
when even in my dreams
you don't love me back

your perfume haunts me everywhere i go
intoxicating me
sweet scent in the air
reminding me of everything we were and could have been

for some reason
i like sleeping with the windows open
the wind,
gently touching my face
playing with my hair
the cars,
singing me to sleep
and the moon,
kissing my chest
if i listen close enough
i can hear the whispered words
traveling
echoing through space
and if i close my eyes hard enough
i can feel the unsaid words
it's a reminder of all the life outside
and all the life inside me
i smile
shut my eyes
and hope
that in my dreams
the windows are also open

there's a lot i'm unsure about
friendships
god
what i want out of life
i look in the mirror and face a complete stranger
i write poems that won't make sense tomorrow
about feelings i won't remember ever experiencing
all i know is
between every word i write
t h e r e   i s   l o v e   f o r   y o u

i can't tell if you're not the same you once were
or i'm the one who has changed
all i know is that
i don't feel your fingers when you touch me
or your taste when we kiss
your body doesn't bring the heat
that used to keep me warm at night
i reach for your hand
but it doesn't seem to fit mine anymore
"what has happened to us?" i wonder
looking into your eyes
searching for an answer
i can't find anything
but emptiness

that was the moment we stopped being lovers
and became strangers

my body is the night sky full of stars
all of them are scars
and if stars are the souls of those who are gone
the scars in my body are pieces of me that slowly died

my body is a starry night
you can find constellations
begging to be seen through lenses of a telescope
begging to be gently worshipped and loved

i'm thinking about you
far away in another country
different street lights reflecting on your eyelids
different winds getting to run their fingers through your hair
different sunrises getting to kiss you good morning
i'm thinking about you
i feel so far
then i look up to the sky
it makes me think of you

shining brightly
soft and sweetly
just like you
you remind me of the moon

i know her name echoes in your mouth
hides between your teeth
when you're touching me
i keep telling myself
i shouldn't stay
but darling
how am i supposed to leave
when my tongue craves your taste?
i'll never be your lover, i'm aware
but for now
the swing of your hips
and your hands around my neck
can keep me satisfied

tonight i will push liquor down my throat
let the memory of every single freckle on your face fade away
and wish i had never learned what love was