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Anka Mar 2019
Your heart isn't in your feet, but your feet affect your heart.
Anka Feb 2019
When you think of summer
Of those long, perfect nights
Patios and parties
Below strung fairy lights

When you think of summer
Warm air against your skin
Hands and bodies wander
Whispers full of sin

When you think of summer
There's someone by your side
Loneliness comes easy
But join me for a ride

When you think of summer
The loose, revealing clothes
The freedom we are given
When its over, who knows

When you think of summer
We spend nights counting stars
Loud laughter ringing soundly
Chasing each others cars

When you think of summer
The burning summer sun
The long 2 am car rides
An endless life of fun

When you think of summer
Feet sinking into sand
The bonfires been lighted
I'll hold you by the hand

When you think of summer
The sunset of our lives
We watch the blue waves crashing
As the summer sun dies
Anka Feb 2019
Even the sun can't keep everyone warm at the same time.

What makes you think you can?
Anka Dec 2018
I think in color-
Bright pigmented hues,
Yet I noticed lately
I'm left with dark blues

The blue of the ocean
The blue of the sky
Bruises of skin broken
Blue eyes when they cry

I waited forever-
For that and a day
When blackness took over
My life slipped away

I woke to a ceiling
So white that it hurt
I closed my eyes slowly
With my death - I'll flirt

My colors are fading
All I see is blue
When grey shades come knocking
Then I'll see them too

I feel the years passing
My time slips away
Obscuring my vision
Is tendrils of grey

I sit in silence
Cold and still as stone
On my face, a smile
From sadness is shown

I don't see in color
Least, not anymore
I hear as I ponder
A knock at my door

As I throw it open
My eyes open wide
Its a simple omen:
Time to say goodbye

I wave to the colors
Of long, long ago
With me on this journey
Only blue will go

I'm facing my fears
It clicks piece by piece
After all these years
I can feel at peace
Anka Dec 2018
Net
She's all soft curves
And jutting edges
Laugh full of warmth
Eyes frozen over

She's like the snow
She's beautiful
Seems so inviting
But she's so cold

She lies
She cries
Deceives
You love her

You're the fish
Her mask the net
And she's
The fisherman
Anka Nov 2018
Could you come back
And stay a little while
I want to see your face
And see you smile

I want to hug you tight
And not let you go
Just sit with my arms around you
For an hour or so

I want to tell you
All about my day
Everything that happened
Today and yesterday

I want to hold your hand in mine
To look into your eyes
I want to ask you questions
To laugh with you and cry

I want to hear your voice
And see your lips move
I want to brush your hair
Style it so you approve

I want to come back home
And see you in the kitchen
You'll greet me with a hug
And a box to put my keys in

I'll help you with the house
And you'll teach me different things
How to cut the carrots
And how to tie together strings

I will learn so much from you
And try to write it down
I know I won't remember
Everything you're saying now

I'll simply spend some time with you
It means so much to me
That you are here today
Right in front of me

I'll try to stay as long
As I possibly can
But either way I'll have to go
The next visit I'll plan

You walk me to your door
And kiss my brow goodbye
You say to me to visit soon
I promise I will try

I get into my car
You're waving to me still
I smile and wave back
Then drive slowly down the hill

Without me noticing at all
A month has passed, then two
So one sunny morning
I decide to visit you

As I'm getting ready
I get a horrid call
It's funny just how fast
Dreams can crash and fall

I'm on my way to see you
But not how it was planned
All of a sudden I'm glad
That I don't have to stand

A couple of days later
It's like nothing has changed
I walk into your house
Furniture's been rearranged

I've spent over a week here
Time keeps flying by, not slow
I'll visit you again
One more time before I go

As my feet touch the gravel
And the green grass on the ground
They carry me over
To where you're laying, safe and sound

In my hands some purple flowers
That I saw on my way here
Thought that it'd be fitting
So they can stay when I'm not near

I kneel down in the dirt
Bow my head to say hello
I tell you about my day
That seemed to be so long ago

I can remember your kind eyes
Still see your gentle smile
Your hands and skin so warm to touch
I'm still in cold denial

Tears are running down my face
And I can't make them stop
I leave my broken heart with you
My salty tears still drop

I place the flowers on your grave
My dearest mother, friend
Getting up, I walk away
Until we meet again
Anka Nov 2018
Late August mornings
The air is getting cold
Wake up, and pull me closer
The sun is rising slow

Slow, like a butterfly, when it lands on a blade of grass
Slow, like my eyes that open, once and then blink twice
There's no need to go faster, there's no need to rush
These late August mornings, lay still and enjoy life

Lay still and take it in; you're breathing, you're alive

Late August mornings
Feel lazy the whole day
Everything I planned to do
I might not do today

Today, life is perfect, no worries, no regrets
Today I plan to stay asleep and dream away the stress
I dream of pretty butterflies, of wind and scattered petals
These late August mornings, I get to feel alive

Sit there, and imagine, you're perfect, so is life

Late August mornings
Rays coming from the sun
Peeking through my window
Trying to wake me up

Wake me up from the perfect dreams inside my head
Wake me up so that I'll feel safe and sound again
Calm, and very happy, quiet all around
Outside I hear the crickets chirping, birds singing their sound

That moment is the reason I love this late summer month

Late August mornings
Coffee, rumpled sheets
Across the room, a pillowcase
Has landed by your feet

Feet that walked a hundred, a thousand million miles
Feet that carried you through everything you did in life
Nobody else will ever understand who you are, what you do
Nobody else will ever get what you had to go through

You stand there, please understand, you're who you need to be

Late August mornings
The breeze plays with my hair
The open window lets in light
With you, its cozy here

The way you said good morning, smiled and kissed my brow
The way you held me in your arms, I want to feel them now
Loved me unconditionally, but beauty has an end
I'm alone now, you're gone, I just have a head full of memories left

I wish you stayed for longer, but time came for you to go

Late August mornings
Like time came to a stop
I lay alone and think about
Nothing and everything

Everything I said, everything I didn't do
Nothing comes to mind of what I loved more than I, you
Not long ago, life was completely different
Changes will come and go, and you were one of them

You're gone now, and I miss you, a smile ghosts my lips

Late August mornings
It's time for me to go
Wish I could stay for longer
Sun came up long ago

Long time until I'll be able to do this all again
Long time until I'll be able to move on from this mess
But until next summer comes, I'll be here all alone
Until I close my eyes, and imagine you were never gone

Reality comes crashing, to imagine is a dream

Late August mornings
My bed is undisturbed
The sheets are straightened out
The floor has lost the pillowcase

The coffee cup is in the sink, the windows opened wide
The sun is up, the open blinds are letting in the light
Instead of lounging on the bed you can find me on the couch
Staring out the window, in my hands a cup of tea

Late August mornings...

They feel different without you; you are all I'd ever need
I lost my mom just over three months ago, which was about a month before my 16th birthday. This was the first thing I wrote about her, I wrote it on the day I turned 16.
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