Why should I rectify this gibberish when I see you micro managing madness with fistfuls of sadness I must confuse the bemused expressions who refuse the notion that gentle hypnosis is a back alley psychosis how nefarious when strangers reprogram a subconscious claiming electricity is tasteless even though I know this hell is faceless its a symptom of dodging complacency so before my mind goes let me free flow like a freak show even though I know I'm speaking hysterically into empty spaces where my downward gazes find hands like phases not a correct callous in sight but the night always reveals a mindful monster with pull string monotony and a silk stuffed voice box eyes like key hole perspectives and blue screen lock go ahead and mock this sincerity derived from a dive into pure obscurity these flaws rust this hysterical mechanical jaw now muted by the awe of virtual sunsets and chemical skylines dotted by dead satellites and styrofoam clouds choking birds now the words confess somewhere an electric wire congregation thins while insect empires binge on a world free of sky high predators still they live in shadows of suited institutions manufacturing delusion like it's a cure for reality

Smile for disorder

Interruptions come
mind put on hold for a time

Static from a lazy radio

Fear in that it starts to make sense

Maybe the rhythm perpetuates these hysterical thoughts

Something buried beneath dead time and reclusive

Morning birds remind one of sunlit obligations

Night madness a fading headache

Coffee with a smoke
the sanity sweets prevail
Find the mind and walking shoes

Drop the lint
Let gather in corners

Fill pants with vices and communication

No key or king found
scattered about and elusive
Full pockets make me panic

A pill for peace
sticks in the throat
None to be had
the water goes down metallic
Syrup thick and flu ridden

One too many and I'm out the door

Stream line crowd
install and plug in
Nausea for the observer
his face fell in with rest

Small voices with the loud ones
Deafening in their articulation

Please

Leave me be

Watch the space girl burn another mentality

Smear the mask and cry into tilted cup

The mind hurts and wishes for alien behavior

Never knowing how savagely human it could be

These eyes so fleeting seem distant galaxies compared to this world so abrasive

I see worm holes and star bursts in the pupils

Collisions and time created
world's destroyed
Hope restored

But solidarity remains elusive
I find it dusty and spiteful
We never stood a chance

You said you needed my soup

But I present my best and your faces melted onto my sneakers

I only had the pair so I now walk barefoot

I soon realized my predicament

This was an unknown land and I lacked public transportation

My space phone broke when I dropped the sky pool

So I chain smoke for signals
hoping for a reasonable excuse

Thumbs would be out but I have trouble trusting strangers

I make my way

Three fields of concrete
train track trance
Overalls with the greasy gloves
cold metal exposure

Finally I see an outlet mall horizon

Ten shops
two in working order

Past the thrift store with it's deceiving Lego sets

Reminding me of infinite childhood disappointment

Because the crucial pieces were always absent

Sneaker shop with the cross
Annoyed reception
See my ***** feet and gasp

Give me shoes I cry your Jesus demands it

My lack of religion horrified the shoe salesman

Who swore I would never wear his sandals

I say gods don't dictate kindness people do

I am acutely aware of my own hypocrisy

I laugh with the rest when presented with crocks

I hear their edible but a chew and a tooth goes flying

They throw me out the door saying I'm my own problem now

Now there's food for thought

As long as it comes fried and delicious I will hear myself out

I am an American after all

Parasite queens traversing my makeshift bulwark

Nefarious creatures straying from complacency

PLEASE LEAVE ME BE

wait...

Maybe you were never real and this pulse was inspired by lunacy

composing scenes full of painted expressions for easier navigation

Maybe time performed some primitive surgery

reassembling a collection of abstract hysterics for an exhausted ghost

Maybe the rain has a more sinister purpose for these crowded spaces

worlds briefly splattered with reflections rendering disbelief

Buzz strut with the edgy biology

high on fumes and nonsense anatomy

Watch it gloat inside a wooden smoke shack

A snake slides splendidly
silently sowing seduction
Gun strapped and glamorous

Laughter fills the spaces
still a soul needs comfort
Cry for the mother

But she is preoccupied

Thumbs aching from the scroll

Plastic and jaded from tweets and tinder

Wine and dine floozies
half starved from vanity
Still they snap before they eat

Pay the tab and leave them to their exhaustion

Cookie cutter units with the virtual reality escape pods

Trampolines for two pennies a leap
But a ceiling denies full potential

I came here with two specific purposes

I only wanted to buy some pants and eat Orange chicken

Unfortunately I've been cursed with a need for perceptions dissected

So I wander the rows dumbfounded

not by the excess or store fronts

But by the behavior and faces of so many singular souls mingling together

I would order from the Amazon

But I find my reclusive nature needs shaking now and again

Maybe the excess empire was too fast for diving

Next time I will just fashion my own fashion

What is a mirror without vanity?

Youth chemically plastered

smitten by Hollywood delusions

Eager limbs with a fine insect coating

What is time without thievery?

The years go and we are left with these empty spaces

Sometimes filled with television glow and robot trances

The kindle and cookies

Let the crumbs gather for the microscopic

What is life without a tilt?

Pour the paranoid another drink and nod at the bankrupt morality

Pat the cornered fiend and comfort his hate filled hindsight

observe a wasted generation

Hysterically hydrated and slumped

What is God without interpretation?

Mine is not yours

but I admire the tenacious taste of a salvageable salvation

I appreciate kindness in all forms

Whatever way it may manifest itself

A smile is a smile

What is a beginning without an end?

Find peace or guilt the path may be up too you

Sometimes the path may be chosen for us

It takes a strong mind
to reject their idea of happiness
For the sake of your own

A body that doesn't sleep
Makes for a mind that doesn't keep

Unhinged chaos shattered night silence
The elephant in the room finally caved in

This one bled
this one prayed
This one laughed
this one played

Crow strewn solidarity through a black and white perception

A childish world left to it's own devices

Wanting trees
Neglected joy
Parks for the ***** stained fantasy

A vacant lot
A vacant eye
A knowing nod
A cosmic sigh

Crash course slum
Head first tendency
Simple machinery
Mainline normalcy

A memory of simpler times
left shaking and hysterical

Ride the steam till morning
Grand plans in the a.m.
Shrugged off in the p.m.

Pick and choose if the body must

But it all leads back to insomniac blues

Voices fighting for space
I needed silence the most
I no longer recognize my face
I grow tired of seeing your ghost

I was lethargic in lullabies

spotlight saturated and speechless

concaved cushions and dim lit kingdoms

fell away inside a chemical nap

I came here hoping for clarity

I found the same chaos rebranded

Imagination measured in concrete stretches

factories inspire assembly line portraits

The painters where all noble fiends

sketching skies for pleasant company

Still these habitats prove overwhelmed

exhausted figures faint from consumption

Familiar anatomy
Familiar tragedy

Calming colors on a brickwork spread

I move through their pauses

A mind full of static
A pocket full of amphetamines
Artificial antics from plus sign suitors

While supplies last the mind will not grasp the severity of such resolve

Unless it's contrived and longs for the fringe

Accommodating dust damp bunkers and fallout nooks

Temporary ploys  
Projectile toys

What savage means for elation

Reality conducts seamless sickness

primitive surgery for existing

Confusion now for these faces and graces that perpetually stream

Conclusions now for a sigh that never speaks

I woke up laughing

tripping over notions of full circle lunacy

Reminding me why I never sleep

I can't handle the scrutiny when my mind mutinies and I begin indulging the delusion of a fun house constitution

Confusion....

When nicotine from a thoughtful fiend is like performing a poor rendition of empathy

...its a fleeting remedy for this elusive void constantly seeping

Voices crowd the ceiling and I have a feeling the expressions that accompany a dawn dazed confession will make this timeline lay low in hopes of a saner discovery

Brains full of pinball malfunctions this junction has no written direction or meaningful connection gleaming

We fall have crazed waiting for the day when reason ascends this fray and finds a world worth clarifying

We echo nonsense its just the consequence of gathering just to displace silence in some chemical pledge so our thoughts can hedge their bets

...never get caught on the edge of haste and uncertainty

You see...
Societies favorite formality is the one that requires smiles for savagery

...but peering into the mirror it is clear sanity has yet to show a flaw worth savoring

TV personas
did me in
Fled my home
no shame to it

Confusion now
darkness now
Light displaced
stained mirror travesty
No images reflected
why can't I see my face?

Wander to a place not so sane
hoping to collect my thoughts
They went nomadic you see
can't say I blame them
No animosity in my harbor
no spite for the stoking

I arrive
somewhere faded
Somewhere incoherent
concrete flood gates
Mud waters for pooling
no cleanliness here
Dirt crusted and **** crops

Homeless sings songs to his reflection
pocket mirror extended
Strange vibes under a bridge
sings sighs to me
When I ask for the privilege

Submerged shopping cart
flipped and rusted
Stagnant breezes
why does one wheel still turn?

Ghosts floats past
faces framed and familiar
Turns to me and mouths

"Moonless motion makes room for madness"

My flight was real
urgency now
My inhibitions laugh
Echoed off shadowed archways
never looked back
I'm still running

All this trouble

Because I could not comprehend a world's corrupt catharsis

I am a hollow sender

build you up and take away your face

I am a make believe Salvation

reflect your insecurities for a change

I am the worst kind of hallucination

peripheral sabotage

your blinks always come too late

I came here for a break

but these walls cannot feel this space

inside these confines we find a brain

chaos crusted but contained

They say I inspire strange

words like a fun house fantasy

yet my message sounds like an echo

The master blaster says I should write in space

that's a task worth taking for a free

shoot me up and I will never come down

I've taken on excessive pacing for some peace

the papers say I'm free for a time

coffee and nicotine fuel this latest craze

sometimes I feel the ghosts complain

my past is one too remember

Long gone are the days of mind benders and fine line headaches

sun spiked and eager

spun cookies and the red blue persuasion

These words build another maze

so I sit here displaced

The time tables cannot refrain
from chemical surrender

watch the molecular rearrange
far gone is it's composure

Sometime I will feel the rain

but holes dug still hinder what could amaze

my last lighthouse disappeared with my organization

and what was left of my mind

Plastic parts and string theories make some noise

Grind another grain mill and watch the wind swept fade

Small finds lead to future calamities

we shake in the shadow

Giants of excess spew pompous protest

We stole the bread for nutrition

but we find it hollow and guilt ridden

Scream for these corners forced
that state we don't really exist

A means to an end and another mansion breaks ground

Still

Broken home hero's die quick and without impact

White collars with the pill pop tendencies

Eat the fine cheeses and discuss the poor

Nod then chew without a clue about  whirlpool waste and desperation

trophy for the time bomb

He got drunk and killed a bystander

I would say innocent but who really is?

but his prison has a tennis court and the family has a scapegoat

Grease filled car ports expel wrappers and ignorance

Trip over the filth while they grin with yellow tooth

I need a vacation
I need inebriation
I need hesitation

Surely I would be drunk tank bound and fine slapped by fuzzy entitlement

leftover brain stew

I found it in the bottom of my ***

I'm not sure on its consistency

But I am sure it makes sense to me

That escalation was merely a product of miscommunication

thoughts and actions misconstrued

Anonymity amplified for the seekers can only lead to desperation and hysterical behavior

Animosity harbored can only bring sickness when we come faceless and wanting

Declare this head space unfit for sanity if you truly believe me monstrous

Who am I?

With pupils pondering tightropes and nails sufficiently chewed

I will surely be my own undoing

You stood there

Mind
Fully
Manic

Your DNA

A testament to life's serendipity

What images do you contain?

What fringe fueled ****** led us here?

My madness was only emphasized by yours

A recipe for catastrophe and we feel no limitations

our respective delusions collide

Stifled inhibitions cannot claim knowledge

Break away moments and we swallow clarity cold

Finally we find a seed for planting

Toxic nutrition and the stem shines sickly.

In our haste we forgot to let in the sun

We watched the leafs fall quiet

I know it broke me

which botched bloom broke you?

Here are some mishaps from mainlining madness

The stars now seem sinister..

they hang from twine on a crowded skyline

like so many peepholes for a pervert god

I could never live up to these fantasies now mass produced

I DON'T HAVE THE ANSWERS

I'm not sure what constitutes base line normalcy

When considering a suited institutions interpretation of reality...

Lines perpetually blur into an infinite numb

Did free will give us the devices for denying our own mechanics?

How do you reconcile a mind retired from wondering?

Are these crowded spaces nothing more than sad faces displacing silence?

and how much enamel was lost...

in pursuit of despondency?

Ponder a fond portrayal

like we don't all cling to crumbling foundations

You may find me accidentally existing inside a stranger I never intended

You may find me blissfully malfunctioning..

break down illuminated by fluorescent hums

Some concrete charades for gray days full of time

Now and then...

I can pretend my plight for silence transcends the rational

We wore these sublime stained expressions so proudly

Tossed some mud and dodged the predators

We had truly achieved chemical nirvana

Short switch and the ignition burns fast

Make believe bombs for a make believe world

bright lights from an old time explosion

Blue green skies fully disrupted

Wrought with pinstriped lines and popped cloud clusters

Abstract and animalistic patrons for this viewing

we came down for a time

but soon realized there never was a good reason

Cannon loaded and funky we shoot back into space

Mismatched farewells with the grudge filled quirks

We populated the moon because we left a trash heap

Blotting anyone who arrived for curiosities sake

Soon we had a nonsense circus that floated with a lack of gravity

we found the space monkey

he  was driven insane from potassium deficiency

still he turned into a smile when offered a crutch for his madness

Why find a remedy when you can perpetuate profound insanity?

One kaleidoscope for the world's viewing

look down and witness the action

We watch trying to comprehend such animosity

Progress left with the dinos
fossilized and forgotten

Spontaneously combust and an arm chair is left smoldering

View through tilted physics and sky high perception

Laugh and back slap for bets won

that war was avoided

this one is inevitable

Shall we estimate this year's hunger?

Shall we rationalize all these downward hysterics?

I think I will stay moon strapped and confused

No urge can be conjured to make that trip back to earth

With a lack of God up here for complicating

We may have found the secret for peace

we never did come down

why?

why not?

indeed sir

Indeed

I wish I could remember the face
sky high homeless
Spins the route
screaming at nothing
Suited satans
move it over
Indifferent hands

Dim room decadence
piano bar
Sand crusted
coke crusted
Make them laugh
make me fly

Swamp excursion
out of the way
Into the night
No time for a plan
Strange actors
strange parts

Remember the plot
elude the destination
Made it intact

Handgun wedding
unsure relations
Nervous for love
nervous for hate
Questions
so many questions
No correct answer
no reasonable explanation
Tried excuses

Slow sigh
accept the body
Discard the mind
Ride the mental
stop the ride

I die twice pursuing saner circles

I ride a wanting wave when life speaks lunacy

Found myself accidentally proposing to ghosts on the subway

Never real

Light speed fleeting

Found common ground in contorted concrete

So many lives fighting for meaning

Surely I can mingle in this hysterical crossfire?

I lost it inside a fabrication
I lost it inside an amphetamine

Never knew the quick fix for a trick switch relapse

Never could conceive the means for blissful navigation

Some capable capsules designed for the stream line

Makes paranoia comply for a nervous showdown

Compulsive colors for a stranger skull

repulsive renditions for your ink and freak

I've never been so certain...

That when I sleep I weep for a world that never ceases

Stomach pain for days

Scraped the bottom of another wonder

Found its emptiness worth pause

Everything is so far away from me

I'm not nearly paranoid enough to ponder a theory

Where master heads perpetually pull strings

However

I am cynical enough to consider these mishaps human nature

An organic trajectory towards the ridiculous

Not born out of contrived chaos

More so the combined effort of makeshift moments

Constructed from an ever elusive fear deep in the DNA

brought into frame by this frenzied free will

How does one accommodate a mad world?

What is the appropriate reaction...

when they say YOU are this madness personified?

How do you traverse faces naturally inclined for objection?

Who said we should come here?

Who dare say we shall go?

The global coalition of closet queens scramble to make meals for Pence

A man who resembles a recalled children's doll

Toxicity in the plastic and he refuses to be house broken

The white house maids have already stepped on his piles

Corn fed and ignorant he turns red in his embarrassment

The scared racists scramble for that giant trash pile in the sky

clinging to their chicken fried lovers

fearing they may be mistaken for a gay man

Watch the child king place a rusted crown on old world hate

Progress was a train wreck

We found the cargo inside a slime pond

I mingle with the rational on occasion

I met my last girlfriend at an anti pipeline demonstration

Black gold chokes the life of rural pleasantries

They only wanted to carve out their peace of progress

but now it will ruin the natives and dissolve these drinking fountains

In America we don't throw journalists in prison

we just slap them with a lawsuit

Broke down they wrap around the bread line

Spoken word and selfless soup put on the shelf

This air blows cold and these leaves crack sinister

The news says hate crimes and bullying are on the rise

Peruvians run the corner store around the way

I went to buy tobacco and Laffy taffy

Their window shattered and crude spray paint over the entrance

apparently mistaken for ISIS

they stand confused and scared

just wanting the same things you and I do

happiness and health

security and a future for their children

A perpetual state of fear
A mind numbing angst

These are the tools we have going forward

Just in case nobody says it

I love you all

and you are always welcome at my table

I found a stow away deep in my skull

my chemical pathways interrupted

I feel unhinged but I see the reasoning

Infinite faces perpetuate uncountable frames

So many the ground chokes from the excess

The master heads came saying they need a reduction

Some souls wasted space so we ship them to their respective gods

Heads not in approval

Surely my God wanted it

Tree top excursions
Suggest dusk has finally come
Home comfort calling
But I misplaced my time

Make my way slowly
City lights grow distinct
Narrow paths for crossing
Rub shoulders with shadows
Acknowledge their presence
Ignore their motivation

The innocent seem so sinister
When the day succumbs to night

A distant figure flickers
Caught by cherry smoke
Coat tails scrape for escape
Urgency in the footsteps
Jay walk for comfort
Not knowing its danger

Chain link detour
Concrete echoes confrontation
Violence shatters my silence
Sounds of hate
Sounds of sadness
Observe a conclusion
A crumbled life line
A spent conscious  
No breath left for lifting

Statue stiff for survivals sake
Hoping for a hurried perception

There is no vanity in desperation

Voices cry from a cold hollow
Asking my place in all this
I say do not fear
For it is only momentary

Some days are easier than others

The problem with knowing your brand of madness fondly

You no longer have a scapegoat for the bad days

The mirror is ever present as you question this irrational thought or that one

Growing momentum with each doubt you unwillingly fine tune your calamity

When you feel the weight of full corners its time to ride

But these avenues perpetuate loneliness

So you wait for that old feeling to pass
or indulge a chemical distraction

Pushing aside times thievery you say morning will come clear and content

But your sun beams shine cold in a summers heat

Last night's crutch gathers inside the stomach

You expel acids and dark matter
splattered on white tile shine

Wiping off your mask you position it hurriedly

Knowing a casual observer isn't hard to come by

Rinse and repeat this world turns to a mad song

But it is yours

A body full of habits

Most of them nonsense

A world full of madness

Act accordingly

My sound broke so I'm suspended in silence

That's okay because these ears hear too much

I sit here head throbbing
Westside window perception
chipped paint with the dead fly

The can man collects his cart
shoes need mending
Soul needs comfort

Bags of treasure
he has it gladly
Rattles down my street
off for a penny
Only an empty echo
scrap for a malt beverage
Sometimes life is that simple

I have a four pawed companion

It's not mine but sometimes he knocks on my door

Which is just fine because I can barely handle myself

We sit in quiet

Watch the tree sway and garbage gather

He stayed away tonight
cold weather being the culprit I hope

No time for the calls at my windows
I know she only wants madness
and I am exhausted

People come

Checking on a body to make sure it was in working order

They say I will give them cancer from worry

I appreciate the intention
I resent the implication

I fear love

but was never cold enough to deny it

Sidetracked sunbeams break through a shaded heaven

Their curiosity claimed the dark

Illuminating an astounding sequence

Industrial excess now lost in a vast indifferent green

It's structure resigned to an organic reclamation

Man made contraptions
corrupted with time

Man made rust
A fine coating for these blooms

Lives once spoken for

Buried beneath earth and root

Leaving only remnants for these spaces less traversed

Tread on brickwork once shadowed with motion

It's wind weaved patterns suggest no recent confrontation

Now only a rains persuasion may reveal its meticulous layering

Footsteps fall and the microscopic scatter

Leaving only an imprint for indication should another soul stumble here

An old man fell victim to pacification
I still see him laying there
body twisted and spent

I remember thinking how undignified he looked

How undignified we all look
when an abrupt transition to violence consumes us

Hysteria in the masses leads to now
leads to whirl winds
leads to fear and pointless chaos

Then we are left with nothing but a burnt out shell
As fragments of are carefully contrived realities begin to crumble

The worst part?

We stand there in the aftermath beat down to indifference asking how did this happen?

Reach for the mirror

It appears the fatalist has won the day

What way is that to live?

Compose yourself carefully

your reconstruction may replace a proper requiem

A clock reaches ******

notice the tenacity and accommodate its ticking

The reflection renders exhaustion

so much energy for a worlds acceptance

one pliable pause may replace this madness

anticipate something more than just existing

I've seen the faces after free will falters

how the sighs replace the seasons

hollow expression like a dime store display

Inside the minds

A parasite proves rational

This hysterical need for the perpetual head nod

Knowing a shake may shatter the shallow shambles you call solidarity

Short circuits cultivated while womb wrapped

Fine tuned at birth by a world's hysterical rotation

Make for minds with a high functioning fragility

We succumb like rust under a chemical horizon

Beautiful shells

Completely absent of inward potency

No comfort came calling

only these cluttered confines now saturated with silence

No acknowledgement that you are real

only discarded contraptions piled haphazardly

They reach into the sky

As if searching for a reason splattered in the cosmos

No remedy found upon arrival

Only an indifferent observer demanding our place in it's kingdom

With merely superficial succulents as frame of reference

We have no clear answers for articulating

A car full of crazy

each mask fully functional

Wine stained logic with the auto pilot motions

I only wanted a new copy of "The Plague"

I gave my last one to a stranger who ask me my thoughts on the human condition

Somehow traffic sticks and I'm left with a stagnant wave that cannot be traversed

My passengers are all professionals in their respective fields of strange

I'm not sure where I found them or how they gained entry

They told me when we first met

"A vehicular persuasion can be potent"

I nod like I understand

With only pocket lint powder and tree's

surely they will have no words purchased

They ask me this and that like I have a clue

With two days no sleep and an unshakable humming of the eardrum

I am on the brink of bronchitis and padded squares

finally we arrive and I leave them to their nonsense

they all went next door to a pool hall

I bought all the Camus I could

I left them there for discovery

Outskirts Denver
highway panic
Road pac man

Find those walls kid's
it's past time
Four should do
but the roof is optional

Pull in
one car
Three puddles

No accountability here
no sane mind
No innocent persuasion

Red light haven
Named panorama
shape shifters
Cracked blinds
cancelled glances
One room
infinite timelines
Leave ours with the others

Complaints may be filed with the doorman

He has remastered the plastic smile


I was derailed temporarily

A rhyme and a reason took my composure

I'm back now

virtual and completely unhinged

Although I'm not sure on my physical

I smile for these more absurd moments

Speed by citrus sale and we beg for vitamins


Ramble for a slow heart rate and I feel my frenzy

They say I'm a mean person

Pluck a bloom for decoration

never mind it's microscopic objections

they say my mind needs medications

the why's and why not

lost with my childhood fun house

I may weave new blankets

sell them to natives small pox free

Currently my thumbs are in a perpetual stage of mutiny

I attempt to starve them into submission

Their resolve proves stronger than mine

I raid the pantry


Delicious delusion

How you propelled my recent episode

funk blaster and the legs mingle

cry into tilted cup and drink indignation

I came for these more sublime moments

stuck in a wave of blue nostalgia

familiar faces propped on nonsense anatomy

smile for the default expressions

with new shoes of the finest canvas

I was feeling quite nice

Somewhere along the way I lost myself

This house was not mine

unknown walls divide strange spaces

Fake paradise festers
cornered and contrived

Closer examination reveals plastic leaf and dusted hedges

my disappointment knows no bounds

boom box throw back and we run out of batteries

The musicians where too faded for orchestration

Sometimes we lose the plot

Sometimes it's elusive nature proves more worthwhile

When free will falters..

madness makes moves

Eyes reassemble for nonsense

Their only crime was observing

A broken system makes monsters mandatory for existence

Some people find it easier to become beasts

The saint may swoon....when savagery becomes easier than presumed

Some find it out of shear desperation

When an indifferent world contorts you into that primitive state

Fang and claw exposed with terrified eyes

A chest full of concrete

A brain forced into despondency...

turn the dial and you only hear static

Sanity sequestered inside coma mechanics...

anticlimax by way of numbed timelines

I would pray for you

But we both know...

the sky is already crowded with echoes

Goodbye

Sitting on this couch

I witnessed my best lamp turn into a goat

in these moments

With no troll for physical intervention

I truly fear me own chemistry

I had to go

It's a strange turn of events when ones mind can no longer be trusted

Even stranger when it comes so abrupt and uninvited

like an old friend with sandbox obligations

Fear in that I have no idea when I actually came unhinged

Relax

Retrace your steps

Find a time when these images actually made sense

When the sky had a less sinister muse

when life echoed humble

When stomach pain was a dull ache

now I sit here without a proper clue as to what comes next

Waiting for this shaken stutter to articulate properly

however with no soul for communication

I must finally face my own reflection

the last time I was here

I saw myself turn into an old man and decay properly

So fear resonates when I step onto cold tiles

I look into the mirror

my eyes say

"where have you gone?"

Don't do drugs

I rarely do

This was a reminder why I usually say no

I came out here hoping for a clue

I found satisfaction
I'm feeling quite nice

I fell away from the rest
lost in a man made haunting
I still felt the joy of transparency

That last moment of ecstasy is where true inspiration lies

However it's fleeting through such  chaotic vision

Sometimes the wires hanging for communication unravel from neglect

Out here in these forgotten spaces breathing comes easy

One can forget his nature and succumb to a more primitive state

In this form simplicity reigns
walk with ease
Sun tinted and dusted
Nature's natural weave woven

But free will is such a beautiful mishap

So to sacrifice that gift for the sake of slow motion seems cowardly

An ignition falters in light of these new procedures

I come back down to earth once in awhile

Sitting here now I feel the humor that caused my last collapse

Watch the complex complicate for the sake of boredom

The strings attached breathe simplicity

So strange these creations
We make them hurriedly
Excusing lives lost for comfort

I came here hoping to unwind

but this carbonation hinders my side step

I hear the hum of the suburban atrocities

I care not for your new satin curtains or white picket fences

Why does your happiness have to be mine?

I have no interest in your self pasta steamer

I feel only joy and confusion that your yoga cancellation is the biggest bad of your day

So I look out of my corners wishing for an escape

In the distance that sanctuary already long forgotten

I see the pines and lack of hate communicated

I ease out of the flesh boxes and word salads

Make my way back to that high point where I roam with that universal flaw

That too much of oneself leads to unhinged behaviour and flight in the most hysterical

Time is a ******

A habit made ancient and unwavering

The proof is merely a paused perception away

Scraped off glass like it never was

left sideways and forgotten

shrouded by shrub and pine

maybe it was merely nerves reacting

maybe it was never free will inclined

What decides I'm me and your the wings?

Why did my free will take me down this road?

Why did my car collide with your flight?

I keep driving

My momentum is now a distant hum for your ear

feathers plucked and scattered

I wish you knew my life
I wish I knew your best

It may seem trivial for some

This feeling of guilt for your departure

But when does haste conclude?

When does empathy begin?

With its potent sting and sensible view

easy for the outsider

I smile for you and your distant sighs

but here and now

With four doors and nothing but highway rhythm

I feel a slight panic

I keep it steady out of habit

my mind never needed this much free time

I think about that bird

I think about where it came from

I think about who may have seen it's flight that day

How many miles traversed?
How many clouds scattered?

I think
I think
I think

Calm hand for the matrix

digital persuasions static responses

Talk show host for nobody

Desert air broadcast and the paranoid keep digging

Why does this nowhere box hum with purpose?

with no direction for its current

surely somewhere dead space shines bright

highway lights and insect genocide

I wonder if they ever know

no lines for the feeding

wires cut at birth and an eye stays vacant

A stagnant crowd for navigating

watch the faces express the expressionless

puddle splash and the *** growls deeply

never seen with calm sight only misplaced anxiety

Fall behind Apple cart and another immigrant starves

don't mistake that tye dyed painter for the sky

she is nearly finished with her masterpiece

the clouds seem real but the rain never falls

with this knowledge I make ground for hydration

Hay trucks driven for a racist farmer

he paid well but inspired nausea

prairie dry with the Yankee cassette tapes

he spent his entire life on the same one hundred acres

yet he claimed worldly insight into why he deserved and others didn't

Some folks on the road inspire hope and happy

An alarming amount prove sinister and spiteful

made it home but I'm not sure why

this space is known and these streets sufficiently trampled

Concrete nineties insignia
tree house trash pile
Home warmth and comfort

this will do
this I can manage

You down there

Elegant and cozy inside your dumpster divinity

I can see the pain painted boldly across your faces

Each scar and crack tells a tale of times indifference

Yet you wear them like a badge of honor

Sifting through the remnants your eyes glimmer with knowing

like these collisions are meant to be

You fell into one another never having a clue

Hate and fluid swapped

On to the next one

I see you flow out of sight

Into corner clubs and shopping centers

Emerge some time later clutching pies and stomach

***** into the gutter and nod at the monotony

Humans harbor hungry hysterics
Small pain for huge comfort

The bars fill one by one

These rainy days make for awkward gathering

Nobody knows anybody but human nature insist we share common spaces

Walls fill and stools turn
***** fueled banter
Listen and never learn

long gazes propped on the elbows

Faces filled with contrition and self loathing

Avert your eyes skyward please
It's peace may soothe for a time

Humble and elastic

Like that chewing gum in the urinals

Watch it bend and contract
Product of a misplaced perception

I prefer these roof top views

My constant sky gazing may be cause for concern

Better I can see the tragedies coming

But we all must come down at some point

Tooth grinding rhythms
spun dizzy by solitary kings
Watch the dollars climb

Enamel lost for moments like these
sanity on the counter top
No conclusion in it's beginning

Swollen mouths slowly splattered
spill mad plans at dawn
******* for organisms
sleep with procrastination
No walls broken
no justice served

Familiar biology is the culprits crutch

Written word is the madman's haven

See through it all in these strange silences

Hollow glances for the caregivers
who paint these spaces gray  

Knowing nods for the wallflowers
Who melt into plaster backdrops

A sound subconscious falls short
Collect the notions for motion

But haste makes for unresolved sunsets

Lost time on a sideway
a good find for the straggler
Dusted off and put to good use

A path well trotted
A ride well worth it

No time for cruel gazes
no time for criminal persuasions
Master plan lost in red blue cruelty

Crumpled mass underneath the arches
resigned and malnourished
Hoping for a sane tomorrow

Wish it luck

Knowing no soul deserves indifference

Life rides come random in these moments and this passenger was car sick

Taking moments for consolidation helps make time tolerable

No sense for the creator who builds castles without walls

No sense for the observer who watches world's die

Here is your mind
complete and confused
Push it back in place
pray it's not refused

I bend branches in pursuit of nostalgia

I collect glances like a glass jar habitat

They light tiny spaces

while a lack of oxygen conspires the *****

No mercy in a world where free will falters

A childish curiosity killed the glow
A Steady display now dim and stuttered
A momentary depression on discovery

Curbside funeral

resigned for the sake of memory

Ponder patterns weaved by a concrete choked charade

We have what we need but hurry for another anxiety

institutions for conclusion fall short under an indifferent heaven

Conviction reassembles

stationery like statuary

human conditions climb the clutter

Your centuries were numerous

Now contained with disdain inside cardboard cutouts

The dusk dances and shade shifts

Under muted skies

Stagnant shadows elongate

Derelict distinction now a contorted silhouette

ridiculous renditions conspire another fiction

We scream for clarity with clinched jaw

This room is full of beasts

Some fiends displaying a mechanical grace

constant in their pursuit of a perfect numb

Convenient gods selling a discount lobotomy..

saying it will help reclaim silence in a crowded skull  

Some souls were left suspended

minds consumed by slow motion

fleeting bliss rapidly expiring

bodies in limbo


When free will falters..

madness makes moves

eyes reassemble for nonsense

Their only crime was observing

I've seen this all before...

reruns from a dizzy dawn

This room is full of beasts

Some fiends displaying a mechanical grace

constant in their pursuit of a perfect numb

Convenient gods selling a discount lobotomy..

saying it will help reclaim silence in a crowded skull  

Some souls were left suspended

minds consumed by slow motion

fleeting bliss rapidly expiring

bodies in limbo


When free will falters..

madness makes moves

eyes reassemble for nonsense

Their only crime was observing

I've seen this all before...

reruns from a dizzy dawn

Insect rivalries disrupt microscopic tragedies

Their tiny objections echo through the infinite


Muted chaos mingles with cosmic clutter

All is lost when stars prove sinister

like so many peepholes for a pervert god


Madness makes moves...

I see eyes reassemble for nonsense

Their only crime was observing

So many sad faces and I'm sick like a benadryl boomtown


Scenes full of primitive make believe

Haphazard halos and plastic queens

They disperse for stranger tilts

fluorescent hums and cancellation

Torn between vanity and breathing



Raised on R ratings and nicotine

Box forts in the junk pile

Yellow sky and rat king stances

Footsteps shrouded by loud speaker urgency

Where do they go?



Time runs low on another freak show

left in shambles by habitual slow motion

Pluck the remnants of distinction

pure intentions may rearrange promiscuity



We are only human

We are only a collection of frantic omissions

These distractions come potent

These observations become motives


Excuse this mind that remains remote

pondering sickness and considering ghosts


One last party for obscurity

One last dive into the spill

I never wanted your minds or graces

I only wanted this banshee to stay still

Life told me I **** at making people happy

But I'm great at making them think

Clockwork declares my trajectory tenacious

Never has it seen such animosity towards existing

My sincerity is matched only by electricity extinguished for better imagining

My demons come from seasons spent consumed by a dripping faucet

Its my only consistency in this perpetual spill

The waves crash into porcelain

I hear it above everything

handheld seas and garbage bird dawns

I'm left wading with sharks

Emphasized spirals of sickness

My condition is nothing special

The mind fuzz declare my brain addled

I still pay the bills but always with a sane display

fearing the snug plug of an electro shock embrace

My imagination is measured in concrete stretches

0rgy arcades and gun powder prisms

liquor lounges with dim lit kings

I no longer linger here

I'm ripped apart by casual tragedy

Surely

This adaptation we consume will prove fleeting in its distraction

Thoughtful fiends ever receding

I choke when I remember there is no such thing as an innocent grace

My perceptions have always come in the depths they do

How would I know if they were truly askew ?

What is base line reality?

Everything is hilarious and nothing makes sense

I stray into suspension

Between despondency and awareness

between survival and empathy

I never claimed purity

I only have a brain full of obscurity

Still

So often I trip over shocked expressions

Limbs in rigid stances

Bodies rejecting mortality

Fine tuned urgency interrupted by the occasional sigh

I'm losing it and I don't have the answers

Muted madness

finally speaking

A radio full of ghosts

quietly weeping

A reasonable robot

will never be found

What is lost

can never be profound