Gratified and mutilated
upon the river I came
I bathed in the water
sopping,sponged and soaked
cleaner than clean
scrubbed to white bone
bliss of cleanliness
of purity
in this one moment,
Head under the water
deeper and yet deeper
blissfully clean
I let go...

Like ghosts we pass each other
moments of who we were evaporated
a nod,a smile,a glimpse on occasion
only feeling when we argue,
bouncing bitterness off of each other.
We are great friends though we tell
as we drift back to our individual shadows...

Thrive in the wind
blood rushing,soaring above myself
below the godlike sky
in between I float and soar
spinning,in control
I am,I am,I am
a part of this
the bigger part of me
the best part,the only
in tune and free
at last...

For laughter I came here
for the same I stayed
'til it became vitriolic
and unfunny
my shape shifting to suit
uncomfortable and not recognised
I shed the farce
and walked away..

You sang me a song
and then took it back,
Held me like a fragile bird
then let me go.
It's cold here
in the sun by myself,
glaringly,blindingly,beautiful,
This bird knows not how to fly
and wants to go home...

When did you return
come back to stone
forgiving all
for giving nothing
taken
ground down,
mortar and pestle
to powder
brittle again
and in a breath
you go again
from yourself
adrift to the wind.

but I had to go mad
to become real
a diagnoses of mirrors
permission to feel,
I miss the drugs
when I swallow the medication
mind numbingly beautiful
with veins like seaweed
wavering in water
salty
thirst never quenched
I crave it like he does.