I was not starving,
Until I tasted you.
I have been ravenous ever since.

I jumped,
Thinking you would catch me.
When I fell for you
I fell to my death.

The whole **** world is living in fear,
Mothers and children always shedding tears
For the daddies that are dead or gone;
But so much is going wrong
That we can't put out fingers on it.
All the rich ones
Who, with silver spoons, birth their sons,
Don't care whats going on in the street
Where even babies are packing heat
Cause every night they're getting beat or hit.
And forget about other countries
Where wars are beyond beastly,
And every other day there's a bomb
Making sure kids don't get home to mom
Unless its in bits.
So we pray for New York, DC, and Paris, France
But no one's making a move, or taking a chance.
And what about places like Syria,
That aren't getting sympathy from media?
But even in the US we like to omit
The kids going hungry
That are treated like debris,
And now the drugs are everywhere
But no one seems to care,
So **** it.

You got that plastic smile
And that painted facade
Showin off your guile
You think you're ****** god
Your minions bow
To the poster child
To the spokesman now
For egos gone wild
But when you step off stage
And that mask comes off
You're just filled with rage
Cause you been slackin off
You stand for nothin
But you preach it all the same
Now people know you're bluffin
And its destroyin your fame
They're callin you fake
They're callin you out
It makes your heart break
Yeah it makes you doubt
If your friends are really friends
Or if its all a scam
If they're goin to all ends
To see that you sank instead of swam
So you're repainting your face
And com in back to your pulpit
Joinin a new race
Where you're no longer a culprit
But soon enough its all the same
A whole new group
Has figured out your game
Quick as if the last one  gave em the scoop
Now you're developin a rep
And kid it ain't a good one
Always behind half a step
Its been so long since you've won
So now you're lookin deep inside
Tryna figure out what's wrong
Tryna figure out what to hide
But you've just been lyin all along
Lyin to yourself
Lyin to your crew
But now you're dropping lies on the shelf
And becomin someone new
So when you look in that mirror
You'll like what you see
Now that person's gettin clearer
Yeah that person's breakin free

I want to travel the world
And make love in every country
Where I'd forgo each beautiful sight
Just to stare into your eyes.
I wanted to follow the stars
To a different home each night
But you've tamed my gypsy heart
And now the north star leads me to you.
You've caused roots to grow
On my once wondering feet
Til I was planted in front of you,
So happily stuck.
Flowers have begun to sprout
On every centimeter of skin
That you've caressed,
Each more beautiful than the last.
You've made me yours my dear,
Without asking.
And I've agreed,
Without telling.

You were there, outside my window,
In a brand new suit and tie.
I let you in, because I thought I
Was a mess, you'd wear with pride.
You, pulled my dress off
And laid me down, for the first time.
I let you in, because in my heart I'm
Just so naive.
You were there, inside my mind,
Still in that, sweet pink tie.
And you became, the twinkle in my eye,
And every single, star in my sky.
I, fell so in love with
You, my reason, and my rhyme.
And my dear, it'd be a crime,
If our love burned out before its time.
And darling you,
Are just so sublime
Standing out there, in that suit and tie.
But its been forever since,
You were out there.
Now you're only, in my mind.

He was James Dean,
My cigarette daydream.
He was wild,
And I was his flower child.
He was my secret,
And I was unfit.
But with that mischievous look in his eye
I never could say goodbye.

There are centuries in your cells
And galaxies in your soul.
A thousand rivers run, rampant,
Through your bloodstream,
And there are worlds waiting to be discovered
In your ever widening eyes.
There are mountains in your bones
And flower beds grow on your tongue.
Your skull holds countless caves
I yearn to explore.
There are dinosaurs in your mind
And stardust in your lungs.
All I need to know is within you,dear
And I ache to learn.

Bottle of blues in hand,
I've had to much to think.
I'm trying to understand
But I've begun to sink.
My mind races
Til I run out of breath,
I've lost my sanity, lost all traces,
I think I've thought myself to death.
Bottle of ***** in hand,
I've had too much to drink.
I'm trying to understand,
But in this bottle, I've begun to sink.

You're the heartbreak
I've worn with pride
And just a tinge of pain
Cause even though its been eternity
Since I've felt your touch
My heart still cries your name
And dear I'm in misery
Cause you played me
And put me to shame
Cause I was so in love
But to you it
Was just a game
When you were there
Outside my window
In a brand new suit and tie
You know I
Thought you were perfect
And that you could never lie
But God was I wrong
When I thought you were so innocent
God I was so foolish
When I thought you
Said only what you meant
I've never been so naive
In thinking someone
Was heaven sent
But like a flower
To the sun
To you I happily bent
When you were there
Outside my window
In that brand new suit and tie
You know I knew
In that moment
My love for you would never die

I'm a problem child
Unraised, but somehow grown
Returning every night
To a broken home
Where fists were mouths
So words broke bones
But somewhere within
A metamorphosis took place
And I took off
Left without a trace
So my scars
Could finally be erased
Now I'm sleeping on benches
Got nowhere I belong
Not looking for a home
I never stay anywhere long
I'm always on the move
Running away from what's wrong
Now I'm beggin the question
Is broken better than alone?

We were renegades
Born on broken
American dreams
Learning to love
With empty hearts
And eyes wide shut
Raised on highways
We were tramps
With voiceless screams
We conquered the world
With just the clothes on our back
But never got our cut
With determination in our voices
And stardust in our lungs
We went over and under
All at once
They called us trash
Though we were anything but

In five years time
We could be happy,
Laughing in the sun
And in the dark.
All my rhymes
Would be sappy,
About having fun
Or what we do in the dark.

In four years time
We could be exploring
Mountains in the day
And caves at night.
The sun could shine
Or it could be pouring
But either way
I'd want you to stay the night.

In three years time
We could be drinking,
Just so we have something
To talk about.
All that wine
Would stop us thinking
Til we want to do nothing
But walk about.

In two years time
We could be fighting,
Arguing with the stars
And with ourselves.
It would be a crime,
A wrong worth righting,
Lying to our hearts
And to ourselves.

In one years time
You could be gone.
My bedside would be cold
And I'd be alone.
But I think we'll be fine,
I think we'll make it.
But in one years time
You could prove me wrong.

Darling, I'm addicted to you
And this love we never knew.
Dear, our story's nothing new,
Its as old as rhythm and blues.
Maybe you're whats waiting for me
At the bottom of this bottle.
Darling, when I saw you I fell,
Far past the depths of hell
Into the beautiful cell
Fashioned by your love spell.
No one else can bring
Me to my knees without a battle.
Darling, you're something to behold,
With that music in your soul.
Dear, you're full of tales untold
And passion uncontrolled.
Maybe you're what's waiting
For me at the bottom of this bottle.
Darling, I love you,
Plain and true.

I was born with a messed up brain
One that makes me feel like I'm ******* insane
I defy all the rules
With my pen as my tool
But these people don't feel threatened
Cause they don't realize that a voice is a weapon
But I've got nothing up my sleeve
Its never been my aim to lie or deceive
I just preach my truth
To my loyal pulpit
Filled with mistreated youth
Too determined to quit
But now I'm stuck on this twisted path
Traveling down this starry road
Feeling like Kerouac
Cause now this road is my abode
The worth of my words
Is equal to diamonds
So they can't go unheard
No I won't sit in silence
Even with my mind in shackles
And my head filled with static
I'm winning my battles
With bizarre war tactics
So now happiness is my test
Cause my sadness is thicker than a kevlar vest
And I know that change is nothing to be scared about
I just don't wanna lose everything I care about
So I never forget to forgive
And I never forget to live
I'm done running now
Its time for me to take my bow

You've been the preacher
Baby I've been your pulpit
You've been my teacher
On just how to take a hit
I fall for you
You say you love me this amount
But its never true
You broke my heart way more times than I can count
So I'm moving on
I'm finally quitting you
I wrote this song
Just to tell you I am through
Now I'll fix my make up
And go out on the town
Its just a break up
I don't need you around
But you're a master
At heart manipulation
So its a disaster
To try and end this relationship
Baby you're my vice
I always crawl back to you
Its my pride I sacrifice
When I lie and say we're through

I am in love with places I've never been to
And people I've created in my head.
I lust for the furthest corners of the world
And the people with passion glowing in their eyes.
I dream of skyscrapers intertwined with mountains
And my city worn body in a country boy's arms.
I hope for a world where the city can kiss the pasture
And the boy can kiss the girl,
And their differences will only knit them tighter together.

The sun's gone down
And the searchlights are off,
Cause I've found that
There's more to see in the dark.
So I'm siting at the bar,
Watching him take his shots.
I'm searching for love
But I've never been so far off.
I wish I knew his name,
But I don't have the courage to ask.
Maybe I'll find what I'm looking for
At the bottom of this glass.

I have dreamt of you every night
Since I first felt the weight of your lips on mine.
To my heart's delight,
It seems like the universe's design,
For you and I to be together
Forever intertwined in love.

And so I found you dear,
With kindness in your eyes and fire in your heart.
Covering my love for you with thin veneer,
Pretending I didn't feel the kick start,
When I stared into your eyes
And felt our souls unite.

"What was it like meeting him?"
Asked gratitude
It was like every butterfly, congregating in my stomach.

"What was it like loving him?"
Asked joy
It was like living through every sunset over and over again.

"What was it like watching him leave?"
Asked despair
It was like losing everything, all over again.

Lights off.
Hands fumble for hearts
Missing, slightly, every time.
Grabbing.
Groping.
Never quite hitting targets.
Bodies intertwined,
But not interlocked.
Lips slipping,
Landing on cheeks
And noses instead.
Eyes scan,
But never meet.
Attempting,
Not achieving.

I have loved you for many years,
Even before I knew your name.
Your heart has called to mine for eons,
Whispering sweet nothings in my ears.

I have searched for you for lifetimes,
And been disappointed at every turn.
For no one I've met in any life
Has ever been half as sublime.

Now I've lost myself in you,
My gypsy heart has found its home.
You're the north star I've been drawn to,
There's no one else I want to pursue.

If I could write you a song
To make you fall in love
I would already have exhausted
Every existing note
And created some new ones just for you.
I'd master every instrument
And grow extra arms
So I could serenade you
With a symphony just half as beautiful as your soul.
If I could write you a song
To make you fall in love
I would already have exhausted
Every combination
Of our twenty-six letters.
I'd master every language
And grow extra tongues
So I could serenade you
With a symphony just half as beautiful as your soul.
If I could write you a song
To make you fall in love
It'd be a duet
Because you play too
And I don't like how my voice sounds
Without yours accompanying it.
We'd play together
So we could serenade each other
With a symphony just half as beautiful as our love.

I don't sling rock I sling rhymes
Though it's not illegal it's still a crime
Cause my words leave you wounded
Not from bullet holes but ears you bled
Cause you know the truth hurts
So everyone averts
Their ears and their eyes
And buy into the lies
Cause they're easier to swallow 
Than that cold ammo
That plagues my streets
And defeats
The home I once knew
Til nothing is true 
Cause that needle in your arm
Isn't doing just you harm 
This city's in our veins
And with all our aches and pains
It draws into one heart one head
So for each man falling over dead
We lose a critical piece 
Of what makes us unique
And fall into the stereotype 
That we're nothing beyond a crack pipe
But I've been this city 
I've seen what makes it pretty and gritty 
I've seen the truth in its heart 
I've seen the truth in our art
That's created this Eden 
But off that apple we've been feeding
Now we've fallen so far
It seems like we'll never even reach par
But in this ghetto I live
Hoping to see it learn to forgive
It's mistakes and my own 
So we can return to our rightful throne

For months now I've suffered,
Being unable to forget you.
Now I have realized
I do not want to.

Last night I dreamt of you again.
A lingering gaze and the hand
That slides,
Too far,
Down a back.
I dreamt of a grin.
Mischievous.
Shared only between us two.
Of blushing cheeks that long
To feel the graze of fingertips
And lips that quiver with loneliness.

I fell for you,
With all your beautiful tattoos,
And those stupid snakebites.
I fell for your strange voices
And your radiant smiles.
I fell for you,
The way one falls
For a stranger on a subway.
Even though I knew
I'd never see you again,
I fell for you.

Since the day you and I parted
I have wondered if there is,
In some other universe,
Another you and I,
Still lying there
Safe under your sheets,
Bodies and hearts intertwined.
I have wondered how many lives
I will have to live
Until my soul finds yours again
As it is wont to do
Because all the love in my heart
Will one day lead me back to you

My head is aching
And full of you
My heart's not quite breaking,
But God, it's painful, too.
When I think of what we've left unsaid
My stomach starts to turn
And with every memory of your bed
My eyes begin to burn.
My hands are at a loss for words
When they can't find yours to hold
And with your voice so long unheard
My ears feel lost and cold.
Each winter storm feels longer
Each summer, much less warm.
Each night the black is stronger
Each star has lost its form.
Mondays feel more blue,
Though every day is black and gray,
You took my rainbow with you
Every time you walk away.
I will my heart to forget
I will my mind to rest
I will my hands not to fret
And remind myself that,
For me, you may not be the best.

I was seventeen when we first met,
Pushed together by fate.
You kissed me on the cheek,
I felt the weight of your lips for weeks.
At nineteen you serenaded me
With that silly little song,
I still listen to it all the time,
Remembering how our voices sounded intertwined.
Now that you have kissed me
My heart is fully thawed.
I desire you forever mine
If you, my dear, are so inclined.

When you come to see me, dear,
Wear stars in your eyes
So I know you're true.
And when you speak to me
Keep honesty in your voice
So I believe in you.
When you come to see me, dear,
I'll wear my heart on my sleeve
So you know that I am true.
And when I speak to me
I'll have flowers on my tongue
Because I believe in you

You look so pretty in your glass house,
Stones in hand.
You look so silly in your glass house,
Thinking you could withstand
All the gasoline
Burning up those bridges you built.
I guess when you were fifteen
You weren't thinking about all this guilt.
You look so silly with that little kettle,
Making fun of the *** behind her back.
Those words stinging her like nettles,
Until, finally she cracks.
You look so mean standing there
Ruining lives without care

With tired, yet glittering eyes,
She watched her world spin
Slowly, then all at once,
Into a beautiful chaos
It would never recover from.
With broken fingers
She mended the lives
That fell apart around her,
Forsaking the cracks in her own
For they let the light in.
With cracked lips
She kisses the wounds
Of those who fall nearby
While hiding her own
Because scars remind us of our past.
With a full heart
And an open mind
She understands the world is unfair,
Yet life is beautiful.
With a beautifully crooked smile
She watches the sun rise
Because each day she learns
The world is perfectly imperfect.

I’ve heard your same seven stories half a hundred times
And I must have told you at least 50 of mine,
Although it seems like you’ve forgotten.
When you asked if you were laying too close
I felt my heart drop,
Again.
Of all the times I’ve offered my heart
And you’ve stood and watched it fall apart
Somehow that was the worst one-
Laying in your bed I’ve grown to know,
Realizing that you've let me go.

I built dreams with you
And breathed them in like air.
I thought we'd last forever,
Instead of just a second.
But you turned into carbon monoxide in my lungs
And I choked til I turned blue;
Which is how I stayed
Til, even though I was still in love,
You turned and walked away.

The exhibitionist
Taking every risk,
Putting everyone in danger
Just to be a little stranger,
Appearing more clear in its simplest form
Cause you're terrified just to conform.
So scared to lose yourself
That its affecting your health,
You're losing all your friends
Cause you'll go to any ends
To stand up and stand out.
So there isn't any doubt
That "nobody's you-er than you
And that's truer than true".
But you're false, you're fake
And it makes your heart ache
So now you're speaking out,
Cause there's so much doubt
That you're even you
Cause you don't even know what's true.

I don't want to weep anymore,
Let us leave that to the willow trees.
I don't want tears to fall any longer,
Let us leave that to the rain drops.
I want to soar,
Let me take that from the birds.
I want to shine,
Let me take that from the sun.
I don't want to look down anymore,
Let us leave that to the stars.
I want to hope again,
Let me take that from your heart.

It's poetry isn't it?
A caged bird.

I put my hand on your knee
Silently, with every laugh,
Hoping you'd catch my hint.
You offered me a ride
To my too close car,
Hoping I'd catch yours.
And because I get a sense of deja vu
Every time you're in the room,
I wasn't surprised when you kissed me.
"Thats enough for now".
You walked away,
With my heart wandering after you.

They said find what you love,
And let it **** you.
So when I found the man
Who made flowers grow
In my charred lungs,
I let them suffocate me.

From one
Who says, “Don’t cry.
You don’t want them to know”

And two
Who tells you
It’s your fault anyway.

To three
Who pretends that
You were old enough to consent.

And four
Who asks, “Was it
Really ****? I think you came.”

To five
Who doesn’t like that you said no,
So he ties you down
And does it anyway.

And six
Who grabs you by the throat
And tells you, “Stop fighting,
I’ll make you feel good”.

To those who think it’s good - yes -
Some think they’re doing you a favor

And they’ll tell you that
You want it
And sometimes you almost,
Almost , believe it.

Thank goodness there are numbers
Higher than one, two, three,
And, yes, even six.

Thank goodness they are not
All the same.

And thank goodness
Thank goodness
We can put ourselves back together
Without them.

Even wild horses couldn't drag me away from the future I see in your eyes.

There's something about you,
Like a Vonnegut tale,
A beautiful thing
With odd little quirks
Around every corner
And in every page.
A glowing light
That sometimes flickers
To black.
There's something about you,
My dear,
That's just out of reach.
So it goes.

Waking up dead
With an empty head
Not a single thought
To be had
They're all out today.
I'm overwrought
And under thought
With pretty lies
My love is bought
And then thrown away.
I've got my disguise
I've got my lies
They're indiscernible
To untrained eyes
It's like child's play.
Waking up dead
With an empty head
All that's in store
Is going back to bed
Its just not my day.

I cannot keep watering dead flowers.
I cannot keep tangling with powers
Way beyond my ken.
I cannot keep hoping for more.
I cannot keep fighting this war
And losing all over again.

As much as I miss you, dear,
I cannot keep watering dead flowers,
Not even an IV can save them now.
Why I'm still trying is unclear,
But I've been giving CPR for hours,
Trying to save this somehow.

I cannot keep watering dead flowers.
I cannot keep tangling with powers
Way beyond my ken.
I cannot keep hoping for more.
I cannot keep fighting this war
And losing all over again.

I never lost
Until I met you
You're my Waterloo

Welcome to Wonderland,
A place to feed your head.
Welcome to Wonderland,
Where you can only go in bed.
Welcome to Wonderland,
Where creativity abounds.
Welcome to Wonderland,
A place where your feet won't touch the ground.
Welcome to Wonderland,
A place to free your mind.
Welcome to Wonderland,
Where when you search, you find.
Welcome to Wonderland,
A place to feed your head.
Welcome to Wonderland,
Where you can only go when you're dead.

Remember when you were young?
Your eyes shone bright like the sun.
Had no worries, had no care,
And everything in life was fair.
Tears came only from bruised knees,
Not from broken dreams.
Your backyard was your kingdom,
Your sandbox the palace,
Your best friend the king.
You had no worries of broken hearts,
Only broken toys.
Mom was your role model,
Dad was your hero.
You were infinite
And full of promise.
Death didn't haunt your mind,
Cause you knew you'd never die.
Hell was a ***** word,
Not where you lived.
Unbroken hearts,
Unbroken dreams,
Unbroken promises,
Unbroken homes.
Remember when you were young?
Your heart was full of hope.

I am from New Jersey.
From the paradise of small towns
And the inferno of concrete jungles.
I am from truck tire playgrounds,
Porch Clubs, and the whistle
Of the Riverline.
I am from divorce.
From alcoholism and denial,
From broken doors and hearts.
I am from next to hell.
From pouring out full forties
For one's homies passed away.
From too many candlelight vigils
And sidewalks littered with fourth grade pictures.
I am from the garden state.
From cows, corn, and Clinton,
And tractors in the parking lot.
I am from tradition.
From pasta and seven fishes,
From "Mafiosa!" screamed in the streets
And "No WHOPs" pasted on storefronts.
I am from love.
From three parents and four siblings,
From six dogs and duplicate holidays,
And the smell of tulips and holly.

Why are all my flowers dead?
I water them every day.
Feed my sweat and blood to them,
But still they decay.
Why are all my flowers dead?
I'll water them again.
I'll hook an I.V. up to them,
Until they thrive again.
Why are all my flowers dead?
They've decayed just like my heart.
Why are all my flowers dead?
They've been dead from the start.