i am the western culture,

i am misunderstood

cos i am different.

i am the irony of century-old tradition.


i am an alien

the one that gets to be looked at twice

i have become their fears

i am the stranger

i am the western culture

i must be misunderstood.

i wept for the moping owl

that had blood dripping form her eyes

then at midnight she’ll always cry

“your demons are out why don’t you follow suit”



I’ve always known this night-bird

for the darkness she and i shared

my shows had also known her

together darkness was our only scar



i loved the dark scribbling of poe

that demons may come and demons may go

on the illusive road of Eldorado

like blood melted in December’s snow



no one is ever there you see

behind the garment of your lovely fear

whatever you think is whatever will be

Goodbye Owl, for dawn is near.

there's a part of me that stays hidden.
the true me.
i hide it from her. for her sake.
if she knows,  i fear i might lose her.
id rather appear predictable to her.
i'd rather be boring to her.
there's a type of darkness that lurks within me.
if she saw it saw
she'll crave for it.
she'll be tempted to take it out of me.
she'll be forced to change me.
and she'll lose me, and i, her.
i don't think she's ready yet.
i don't think my virus is all in her yet.
she has to be too far gone to know who i am.
after all, love is all about losing oneself to another.
she makes me vulnerable to everything.
but i don't think she's ready for my kind of love
for my kind of love is exhausting, it ***** everything up like a vacuum cleaner.
it's like a disaster, and earthquake rather.
my kind of love is rare. it's pure, and it's deadly.

i let her **** me.
slowly at first.
i felt the life leaking out of me into the thirsty ground.
it was painless.
she killed me so well i wanted her to do it again.
i ask myself
how did i get here?
how did i make her my self control?
the question are useless now.
i'm trickling to my last bit.
i've tasted the euphoria of death.
i have taken death by surprise.
she is not the murderer.
i am.