I stay up waiting for the day that I never wake up
Hoping that I just open up my eyes and see The Lord standing right in front of my eyes but who knows when that day will come I just
So I just wander
Looking for a path I got good intentions man I swear I do
Some people just won't understand the things I do
So I pray God help me find the way...
This long cold road and I always stray away just young that's tryna get paid
Lord I notice you've gifted me with the ability to see the things that the blind can't see
For the blinds ones see the wrong things and they don't see the good in me and when I do sin they all on me
So lord forgive me I ain't perfect but I think this aint worth it no mo...
Why the poor man struggle the white man can't stay humble the black man can't stay outta trouble
It just ain't worth it to me...
Why can't the blind man just see
Lord you shouldn't have blessed me to see
Because I always deceive
The things that me the most to me
For I am simple man not tryna play with no gun in my hand but I'm possessed by some demons that always got me scheme'in....
So God send Jesus to me I wanna believe again that soon one day I will  live with no sin
that the blind will see
And I will be free.......

You honestly have no idea who the ****  I am and you don’t know a thing about me and probably  never will

I will never open up to you

Effort: 
“an earnest or strenuous attempt”
I put alot of effort into things…
I put effort into school, relationships,family,sports, and more… It’s gets STRENUOUS! 
But I keep pushing because I know sooner or later I will reach my goal and sooner or later there will be some to carry this load with me
She may not be perfect but she’ll be perfect for me…
My Effort has been challenged more then once it’s been challenged often actually but I can’t quit there’s ppl that depend on me 
Like my lil brother he looks up to me he needs me he needs someone to set him example or he would mess his life up
Me I have father he isn’t the greatest but hell tell me the truth sometimes it’ll hurt but I needa hear it…
He didn’t have the best father figure but to be where he is right now is amazing he could’ve fell into terrible things…
I promise ill be better then him i have the EFFORT to handle that…
School is starting to wear me down but I can’t give in I have to struggle to get these grades I can’t give in or ill fail i don’t wanna be a failure i wanna be far from that I have goals that are bigger then ****** dreams!
That’s why I call myself i_dreambigg
Because no one dreams bigger then me but I’m different imma make a dream a reality ! 
Best believe that !
I never hold something against somebody ill always forgive 
You could **** me over a billion times ill still come through for you cause im that guy 
Ill treat those how I want to be treated…

Trying
Why should I try?
When all it does is lead to lies!
And then later I just cry
I want it to stop
So I can chill with my pops
Maybe he'll stop kicking rocks
And moms will put down the pills
Then my brother will be a chill
Cause trying is hard and loving is harder
And trying to love someone who doesn't love you will leave you ill
Wanting to take pills
Because u cannot chill
So u start kicking rocks lik ur pops
Oh Boy don't  you want  it to stop
But just lay there and cry
Because that person lied

Yeah I love you but u take advantage of me u take all of my love for granted like im nuthin to yah...
It hurts hits me straight in the heart but I shrug it off likes its nuthin cause imma soldier I gotta be this world would eat me up i had to grow up fast where came from the streets is tough boy
Words from grandpa
U never kno what's out there for u never kno what's in store
I used to wear my heart on my sleeve so I went n bought a jacket so these ****** can't hurt me...
I just wonder why the love of my life does it to I hand her the gun n she basically shoots me in the back but Ill take the Bullet cause lik I said imma soldier !

I dream of the day I can see you smile with no pain hidden inside
I can't wait till I pull up to your 8 bed room mansion
If I could only have the chance to give back the same amount of love Back to you

We use to stay up late laughing about the struggles we've been through
I'm praying my wife has atleast one of your skills

Just let me adore you bae is it that hard
I just wanna hold you
Kiss you ill do anything to please you
I wanna spin you around and show everyone your beauty
When I look into your eyes it's like looking at the stars at night
I want you now and forever
Ion need no other dont you see your my one and only
Your looks are a distraction I get lost in your beauty
Your all I think about
I day dream about you all day
I strive for you....
My goal is you
Darling you shouldn't have to work a day in your life
Your body is my temple
I cherish your every touch
My weakness is you...