Those names you called me,
That shame I felt.
It's a cycle of fear,
And humiliation.
You put me down,
Then try to bring me up.
You're jealous, overzealous, and sinful, 
You're just a beast in human form.
I try to run but just fall down,
For the path is rocky at best.
You chase me down, 
And pull me back in.
Say you love me,
Think it will fix everything.
Make it all okay,
Just forget all the problems.
My life isn't my own,
I'm on your leash.
My decisions are yours,
My actions monitored.
You say I can't be friends with him,
That's not okay.
I can't go to the movies, 
You're not there.
Lies, deceit, and broken promises,
Chaining you down in a pit of helplessness.
I can't leave you,
I'm scared to.
You threaten, hurt, and cry,
It's not your fault, right?
Right?
I'm not sure anymore.  
You say you'll **** yourself,
If I leave you'll end it all.
You put that weight on me, 
It's dragging me down.
I'm tethered to a pole, you're beating me down. 
Sending me spinning around, 
Just to send me the other way.
This needs to end, 
The pain needs to stop.
I'm leaving,
I'm done. 
Goodbye, 
So long.

Mitchell S. Bartlett

I'll be your Oathkeeper, your Sweet Memories, your Star Seeker. I'll unlock the Sleeping Lion within you with Oblivion and show you the Way To The Dawn, then pull you back with this Bond Of Flame. Don't become Heartless, or a Nobody. If you fight for me I'll fight for you. Ill Master this Valor using the Wisdom of the Final hour. Come unlock the World That Never Was with me. Come be my Kingdom Key

Mitchell S. Bartlett

Today, I’m sorry,
Yesterday, I was rude
This fear of losing you is sending me reeling
Right around this trailing cylinder
Holding my thoughts
Feelings
Emotions
Locked tight in my heart
You hold the key
Just a jester telling jokes
I make you smile
Laugh
Maybe even cry with joy
You see me for who I am
And I see you
I wear my heart on my shoulder
So I don’t go and lose it
My lungs on my shirt
My ribs on my jeans
I store my words in my shoe
Hoping I’ll stamp them out
Before they leave my mouth
This world is my mistake
I shouldn't get involved
I’m lost in the sanity of this voyage
It seems so right
Its taking me somewhere I don’t know
A destination of hesitation
I wait for your response
Praying it comes with a fraying voice

Such a gentle thing,
Wrapped up in a sheltered fortress.
I want to bust my way through your walls, 
But I'd rather you'd let the gate fall down.
So I could walk on through,
And love you like we used to.
These walls covered in tapestries of memories,
Thoughts and opaque opportunities.
I want to create you a window, a stained glass world.
It would never fade, 
Or fall apart.
This castle is yours, 
You built it from the ground up.
Stone walls and a vision of what you wanted,
You built something strong.
With passages leading in, but a moat to keep others out.
You put piranhas in your pit, to devour all those you didn't care for. 
I managed to get past once, 
Twice,
Now I'm asking for one more chance.
Let down your drawbridge, 
Let's make a new addition.
We'll make a dungeon for the sins, 
And a treasure room for the memories.
We'll have a prince,
And a princess.
There'll be a dragon in the keep, and a phoenix in the study.
We'll have a modern medieval life, 
With all the jesters, peddlers and jousting. 
You can be a queen, 
And I'll be your king.
I'll build us thrones in the foyer, 
And a grand hall in your heart.
No room shall be locked,
No secrets kept hidden.
Now I'm waiting outside, 
Singing you a lullaby.
I'm throwing stones,
And wearing a mask to the ball.
I'll be your modern time Romeo, just for you, my Juliet.

Mitchell S. Bartlett

A faint noise in a current of forgotten happenings
Some unknown feeling I fight for to keep myself together
Time out to determine the source of this pulsing sensation
Alone to a day met in an alley
Vocalizing a pain I've known for a while but refused to show
Falling apart to the rhythm of solitude
My world just isn't the same
A spark forgotten long ago that held us together
I'm bleeding from the outside in and wiping the dirt into the wound
Good times left undone as we spend lives apart
Hosting feelings of gratitude and self-worth
I'm not gracious but hostile and volatile
A bomb waiting to blow apart
My timer set to minutes
I speak my mind but its gone in seconds
I've torn my sleeves off send my heart with them
I left my pleadings at home lest they come out as despair
My words come as murmurs in the wind
Taken away as they reach you
Faint sounds of a time left unspoken
Etchings of moments that have yet to pass
Crystal ***** show what is to be but mine is an opaque abyss
Just sit back and wait for whatever happens next
I can't change the past but maybe the future
Just sit back and wait

Mitchell S. Bartlett

I miss you
I love you
You broke my heart over again
and I can't recover this time
It hurt so much I can't
replace that feeling of trust
I gave you my all
and you gave it away
you gave it to him
in a bed of lies
lies told to me
and her
you didn't cheat
you just slept with him
while I
was in your arms
not in your heart
never in your heart
he slept with you
while he held her heart in his hands
it was an accident right?
just a mistake?
how could it be
just happenstance
only a misjudged position that led to pleasure
you hurt me
so badly
but
i miss you
i love you

I've lived my whole life in a book
Just wanting to get away from this world
Wanting what I read
What I imagined
What I dreamt life could be

I've lived my whole life in a book
Picking every word apart
Dissecting every sentence 
Looking for a key
Something to let me in
Into a place better than what I was supposed to call home
 
I've lived my whole life in a book
Reading every line
Memorizing every paragraph
Every page
So when I left what I was comfortable with, I still had some of it with me

I've lived my whole life in a book
One of my creation
One to keep reality away
To keep the shadows of life from closing in
Looks like I only have a few chapters left

I tried to live my life in a book
It worked pretty well
At least until it ended 
With the story drawing to a close
The plot coming to an end
The final page must be turned
In order to start another epic

My book is finished
But not to worry
For I have so many more
However this time
I think I shall create my own
For this is my story
And I'm not about to let you
Write one for me

Mitchell S. Bartlett

I cheated you
I broke you
I hurt you
Now I'm sitting in this cell of white
Thinking of all the times I've bled you
Arms cut red
I caused your pain
I hate myself for it
You mean too much for me to do that again
Sitting by these walls of white
I think I'll try harder
To earn you
To keep you
To protect you
You call me your Hero
But when have I ever saved you
So far I've only caused pain
I'm changing
For the sake of "Us"
I'm losing my mind
In this building of white
Wondering when I will hold you again
I see you when it's black
I feel you when it's red
I hear you when it's white
These colors dancing around my head
Reminding me of your torture
480 times I've felt your pain
4 times your heartache
3 times your tears
I've killed you over and over
It's high time I lived up to what you call me
And be your Hero
My visions going black now
So I'll see you again
In this facility of white

Lighting up my life in that subtle smile of yours
You are my hearth and my health
The love of my life and the answer to my prayers
You're my babygirl and my guardian angel
We'll stay young forever and never tire of the silly things
Piercings and tattoos, we're the odd ones out and we love it
Spiders and Butterflies all in one

For all the things that aren't 
And all the things that are
This is
That wasn't
And those 
Might not even be

As if one could be two and three could be none
Existence is nothing save appearance

My reality is broken 
I came into being 
Knowing things for certain 
Until I was proven otherwise
After that
My reality was a pile of thought nots and never were's
My reality never really was

A being of endless possibility
In a world of fall flat imagination
I dream to live
I dream of being
I dream the days into years
And those years will never stack up
We'll be in groundhog day forever
Your reality
I'm living it

In my world
Paper cuts bleed worse than a stabbed back
Broken bones ache worse than a shattered conscience 
My reality 
Is now

I'm in a world mirrored twice to the opposite of what you used to know
I'm in a world so twisted and ******* up that the only way to stop it is with a cork
This reality
Is real

So for all the things that are
And all the things that aren't
This is
That wasn't 
And those
Might not even be
This is
My reality

Mitchell S. Bartlett

These words etched into my mind
Beating sense of meaning
Pulsing into a rhythm of bliss
Bleeding out when they're broken
They're veins in my body
Living with me
Derived from my feelings toward her
I can't help but lose control
They own me
Now more than ever
I tried not talking
Not eating
Not sleeping
It made things worse
Those words just beat stronger than before
Like a fire that refuses to die out
I throw stones at them
Only to get boulders thrown back
Its a one way street
A one sided victory
These words rule me now
I'm sick of them
Yet I still think them
These three words
Control my everything
Those three words
Are my everything

I won’t say much about how I was raised
Except this, it was horrid
Bugs flying every which way left me mortified
Up until my death bed I will be aggrieved
Crawly bits going over my feet
How did I end up in that situation?
Why was I in the pit of disgusting things?
Oh well, you see, I’m out now
So I guess that’s all that matters
Just a bmp in the road
Yet, now it seems I see things
At night in my dreams I wake up screaming
As a snake wriggles across my chest
And millipedes writhe down my throat
That life apparently wasn’t good for me
Not in the least bit slightly
My mind aches from nights spent awake
Praying on the side of my cot
Hoping the badness would go away
That the monsters would stay out
But to no avail
Why did I end up this deranged?
Why am I so sick in the head?
You can blame my upbringing
And all the things that haunt me
But for now
I’ll pretend I’m fine
For I can’t wake up otherwise

This is it
The last time I try for love
Its been evading me thus far
Seeming to come close
Just to move father away
Its a difficult road
Bumpy, Crooked, and Long
I just want to take the easy way off
Run off the path
But I can't rush it
Not now
Just one more time
The last time

To gain-l
ess virtuEs (
undone storie
s
that tell lies to their child
ren and spread
       demons in the
ir wake)

Trappings of souls in wHite. Threaten our days

Until all that’s
left; rather diminutive
findi
ng passion in Th
e cold (under dure
ss
  gathering riche
s in frost heaves
upEnding mound
   s of dirt) to reach a g
oal

Gratitude multiplies under the weiGht

Of longing and
b
l
i
s
s
    Our hearts a
che for restitution
Hardening un
der your tOuch (reaching
    A point of n
o return, yelling, tur
ning
Plotting i
n our graves)

Today is the end of everything Together

From beast to beast; ash to ash
Forming lost words from recess, Sunken into the abyss
Contradicting what you know to be true
The lies are made of tears, falling kindly on her shoulder.
Fret not, thy beautiful rain maker
Worry not, for the pleasure is mine
To comfort and support the making of your diamonds
You may be unwell but

It’s my job to care for the deprived
Be to the distance as the distance did to you
Stay strangled from the world, taking homage for its sins
Live in the shadows of your own heart
Fret not, for thine is a beauty lost
Worry not, for you can simply live
To grade and perform unlike others
You may be unwell but

From daemon to daemon; crust to crust
Forming time into your mind, buried in the sand
Controversial to those deeds forced upon you
The lies are made of tears, dropping Heaven onto her shoulders.

To the sea,
To the sky,
To the vast earth at our
Feet
I bid you a thanks, for gifting me your
Beauty
Shining bright, holy, lively
Full of aimless wonder, glowing with positives,
Amid the strangled uneasiness

You give new purpose, gaining strength in hordes.
Fly above head, filling my sight,
With clouds, specks, stars,
Emptiness
Yet beautiful in its own right
Bearing oceans of wealth,
Not money, but courage
Enough for everyone, amidst the array,
Breathing longing for your embrace.

Waves painted turquoise, hefting
Barrels of torrent, crest, chopping
Heavily away
Towards
Unheard words, whispering seashells
Into my ear, I hear your voice, calling
Beckoning for me, I walk, I run, tripping
Over myself
To get to you

I praise your beauty
For it lightens my heart
For it eases my mind

I need lies
For I am sick of the truths
Untold revelations revealing indication.
To be told
As the leaves fall.
That one is up, Instead of down.
Would you feel as though
You’ve been lied to, prayed victim, insulted
Made a fool of your own.

Devices, trivialities, trinkets, and goodies

O deities keep us occupied, with times undone
Encompass us with stars of our lights
And reveal our destinies, and shape our futures
Lie to us in fashions, stones that tell the wrong
And foretell undoings, wrong-ings and corruption

Hang your false pretenses out, to dry and fade
Bind us in iron cuffs, braces, shackles
Tell us not the truths of the world
But the lies of your lives.

She's standing alone
Wondering when the day will come when she
Hears his voice again
Feels his touch on her skin
And she
Yearns for his love
His acceptance 
That one thing only he
Can give her
He's sitting alone
Thinking about the day when he can kiss her
That day when he gets to 
Hold her in his arms
He misses her touch on his chest
That
Way she whispers his name
So loving
So honestly happy
They're two of a kind
Just kids being kids
Really teens 
Not wanting to leave those
Innocent childhood memories behind
They're killing time
Wasting days
Throwing away the thought of 
Growing up
Now
They're spending their days in each others hearts
Looking
Searching for that one thing they both want
Finding it when they look in the others eyes
They found love in two children that
Haven't yet happened
They dreamt of times when
It was all that would matter
Those two kids refusing to grow up, found love in each other
Now they're killing time, wasting days, refusing to grow up together

Could you paint me better off?
Clean my minds slate?
Pull my strings
Control my emotions
Will you seize my day into your own and furrow my brow?

You’re me
You should be able to
So why can’t I?

Would you nail in my loose screws?
Dig up my skeleton from the closet?
Pour my heart down the sink
Or break it over the counter
Will you count the suffocations tonight and pull the pillow from my face?

You’re me
You should be able to
So why can’t I?

Can you pull me from the crawlspace in my head?
Ground my thoughts into dust?
Pillage my safety
Leave me defenseless
Will you throw my disarray into the trash and dump me in the backyard?

You’re me
You should be able to
So why can’t I?

Dare you play with my conscience?
Sleep lonely on my spine?
Uncover my sarcophagus
Placate my pain
Will you befriend the dominions and wash away the stain?

You’re me
I’m you
So why can’t I do
What you can, too?

Death,
Comes slowly at first,
Riding a ******* steed.
The night,
The darkness,
Stringing sickness about.
Beckoning him to your door;
Giving him free reign.

He will come for you,
For your soul,
Your heart.
Leaving only pain.

For those around you,
It is but a silent whim.
Whisking away
A loved one;
Carrying you higher into the Heavens,
To face your judgement

Be it by gas,
Or blade,
Be it by a method unseen.
His horse will come,
And ridden by Greed
For death has been slain
By a Sin unbeknownst