(“..pardon me while I burst..”) but

poetry is my drug -
I’ve injected my surfacing thoughts on many tables
                                  over many nights
my own reflection stuck in permanent glass..
but now I’m slowly running out of veined vanity

it was never mine to own anyway..

this world is a freebase for words
these words are tweaking on walls
those walls are crushing the wails
that wail is the fix for the whole world..

pretty boys, w/ their confiscated smiles:
                they walk along sidewalks pretending not to howl
                their thoughts into barricaded minds & then we
wonder just how much sincerity is left behind
                their calloused words, their shameless eyes
                all caught up in assumptions that
the world is theirs for the taking
skyscrapers are built in their honour
while below, the pavement's bruised by broken glass
                                          windows of the future,
                                          widows of big city memories

makeshift Sundays,

I’ve heard your aerial views of underground endless
moments wrapped in summertime perfumed permafrost
once too many times
                             you’re melting in a post-industrial candlelit day

while the atomic monster came (to take me back home..)

penetrate this city’s mind:
it’s
          divided
                   divine &
                             disguised..

title does not dictate behaviour:

your authority, throw me down on
broken knees but you still need me
                        achieved your dream,
                        but you still scream (at me)
obeyed your insecurities
unlocked the noose
& sprayed your words across walls
built
          to
                   divide us..

but it’ll never be enough
                               for you
                                for them

statues toppled, city ruins running rampant
in our veins, our minds washed away,
            rid of your poison now

a new day
a new dawn

                    separate me from you
                   cut the lock

                    this (friend)ship has sunk

in the span of sparse seconds, thoughts united &
won vs. maddening midnight
specials – our voices,
                                                 our choices
are now running further down the road..
our hands are leading,
our fists, breaking obscene visions that our visionaries

never even had.. r(evolution)
                                      happens everyday

my manifesto is shining w/
                          torn pages full of watermarked memories
                                                      watercolour poetries written late at night
                                                      barely sleeping dreams slowly seeping in

& freedom found me once again
free them from their sheltered grinning eyes
I lay so many nights mesmerized at
            the beaten thoughts
             my beating heart threw them all out on stranger streets than yesterday

                                                   driving down tomorrow’s permanent
                                                   highways we’ll always be left w/
                                                   another memory to steal from the
unjust
            banks
                        in our own
                                           backward backyards slowly etching out our brains
from plagued moments of “fame” protect the
fathers from their nameless namesakes left forgotten under the stars

                            abandon all hopelessness,
                            abandon all scars..

we all know that shelter is in the speed of light
so when you read your thousandth eulogy, ignore those
               aftershocks in your mind – your hands, they’ll
                                                 hold other hands forever & throw their own
                                                  sand in the air (a different season every time)
“welcome forget, forgive has already left..”

paralyzing highs & my eyes, they’ll realize (again) that
time stood still for far too long
                                       these rooftops where I left my belongings,
                                       some change for a thrilling night & maybe even
                                       a moment of daytime paradise to send off
this pair of dying “I’s”: so close to freedom

(I bet you I can scream at the shore from here..)